Because of how long this had been a problem and because of how long I had struggled with it, I felt like He was disappointed in me. I thought, "Celestial kingdom, no way. There's no way I can do that, you know. The prerequisites are so specific, and 'no unclean thing.'" For the longest time, I thought, "That's not for me." And every time I would indulge in pornography, I would feel that shame and that guilt and kneel down and pray and say, "I don't want to do this," you know. "Please help me." But that's not enough. "I read my scriptures. I've served a mission. I've done these great things. Why don't I feel that healing power?" I guess I was just expecting it to heal me without any, really, effort or faith on my part. [MUSIC PLAYING]
The person on the edge of addiction or who seems to be addicted may be the one in the greatest despair and who thinks there is no hope. This person has moral agency. This will require extraordinary help. It's not all willpower. And the nature of that help will depend upon the nature of the individual case. But there is hope because even at this point, they still are sons and daughters of God, blessed with moral agency, which is the capacity to act and not be acted upon. When the Lord set the conditions of mortality in process, He had to give us agency to learn from our experiences, and He had to allow opposition. And some of that opposition is terrible. When we agreed to this life in mortality, we agreed to be subject to a lot of mortal experiences, including temptation, including health difficulties and other kinds of opposition. Expecting the Lord to remove opposition is expecting Him to remove His plan of salvation. And we shouldn't say, "God allowed this to happen to me." What we should say is "Why did God allow me to come to mortality?" And if we ask the question that way, we have our own answer. And I remember the first time I really kind of prayed for that help. It was kind of a prayer of desperation where I said, "I don't understand the Atonement, and I just need help. I can't do this myself, and I want to have faith in that power. And I can't do it anymore." And I really started to feel strength that I know wasn't my own. If we ask, He'll get the help. He's not going to remove the circumstances, because the circumstances are dictated by the plan of salvation and opposition in all things that we encounter in mortality. But He stands ready to assist us, and the Atonement reaches that kind of problem. The Lord suffered not only for our sins, but He experienced all of the afflictions, temptations, and difficulties that we have in mortality so that He has, as the scriptures say, descended beneath it all, that He could know how to succor us in our afflictions. Faith is not just wishful thinking. Faith is a principle of action and of power. As we act in accordance with the teachings of Christ, then the power, by the Spirit, comes into our life to do and become what we could never otherwise do or become. Jesus Christ suffered for this so that I could go through it, so that I can have this experience, and so that I could learn and grow and become the man that I'm supposed to be because of it. The Atonement of Jesus Christ is everything for me right now. It means I can be whole again. It means I'm complete. I'm not worthless. I think that's probably a big thing, is that I have hope, like, whereas before, I didn't really have a lot of hope. When I forget who I am, when I forget that I am a child of God, I think that I have to go it alone. But when I remember that God loves me and that I am His son and that Christ died for me, I remember that I don't have to go through this alone. Our Heavenly Father does live. There is a Savior, a Redeemer, Jesus Christ. He is actively involved in our lives to the extent we permit. And His grace is sufficient. It's infinite in its reach, in its scope. It's in Him. He has that power. He has overcome all things, and He has full right and power to bless and assist us in any way we need as we turn to Him. And I share that witness by the power of the Spirit that testifies of Him and of the Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. [MUSIC PLAYING]