Gospel Living

Feeling shy?

18 Mar 2024 | 2 min read

Here are 9 ideas that can help.

Most people feel some degree of shyness in their life—whether it’s a temporary dread of public speaking, or a persistent anxiety that makes social interactions hard.

For example, this month’s For the Strength of Youth magazine had a story about a young woman named Jessica who decided to serve a mission, even though it was really hard for her to speak to people.

“The wonderful thing about Jesus Christ is that we don’t need degrees or extensive résumés to serve in His kingdom and be strong disciples,” she testified. “If we are humble and sincere in our desires to serve, Jesus Christ will take us exactly as we are, where we are, and give us the necessary help and strength to serve Him.” ¹

Here are some things to try when you feel shy:

Pray. You are a child of God, and so is everyone else. Heavenly Father wants to help you.
Breathe. Sometimes when you’re scared, you forget to breathe deeply enough. Taking slow, deep breaths can help you calm down.
Smile. Sometimes when you’re feeling shy, other people may think you don’t want to be their friend. Smiling tells them that you are nice.
Try. When you are in a situation where you’re feeling shy, you need to leave your comfort zone. Start small, and work up to harder things.
Assume the best. If someone doesn’t act like you hoped, maybe they are dealing with challenges you don’t know about. Give them the benefit of the doubt.
Practice. Think about what you will do and say before you get into the situation. You can even practice with family or friends.
Start small. Focus on one or two people at a time. Try smaller conversations, even in bigger groups, until that feels more manageable and then try talking to more people at a time.
Help others. Think about and help others around you. Remember, someone who seems unfriendly may be shy just like you!
Don’t give up! It may take a while before you learn to overcome your shyness, but don’t stop trying.