We can’t control what others choose to do.

Life can seem unfair when you suffer the consequences of other people’s decisions. After all, you’re trying to use your agency to make the right choices—so why aren’t they? Here are some helpful things to keep in mind when you’ve been hurt.

1. It’s OK to feel sad.
   
   • Even Jesus cried when sad things happened. (See John 11:35.) Ask Heavenly Father for comfort and help. If you feel sad for a long time, talk to an adult you trust and ask for help.
2. Focus on what you can control.
   
   • You may not be able to stop your parents from getting a divorce, for example. But you can choose to focus on saying your prayers, helping your siblings, paying attention to healthy relationships, and setting goals for your own future family.
3. Remember that you have a divine identity and purpose.
   
   • You have a grand life story—one that began before this life and one that will continue long after this life is over. You are the child of heavenly parents! These challenges are only a small part of who you are.
4. Jesus Christ can help you find personal peace, even when those around you aren’t peaceful.
   
   • Life is a stormy sea, and it’s easy to wish that God would calm those storms for us. But sometimes instead of making the sea calm, He calms us, the sailors! Keep praying, reading your scriptures, listening to uplifting music, and trying to find peace in the ways that you are able. Someday you will have more ability to choose your surroundings, and things will get better.

Also—and this is really important—if somebody is hurting you, especially physically, tell an adult you trust about it right away. Keep asking for help until you get the help you need. You deserve love and respect, always!

Find more ways to move forward in faith in “When Other People’s Choices Hurt You” in the July 2023 FTSOY magazine.