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Transcript

Hi, I'm Cambridge Kaylor, and that video clip was me. And that sport. You saw is equestrian vaulting. So it's gymnastics and dance on the back of a moving horse.

And it's a beautiful sport I fell in love with as a child.

And although it looks pretty extreme, It’s actually one of the safer horse disciplines out there.

And I spent ten years training in that. sport to become an international competitor.

Also, during that time I was a ballerina.

I did a little bit of gymnastics, I did cheerleading, and I was also a member of my high school diving team.

So I saw myself as an athlete and a horsewoman. But on June 21st 2005, I was training with my team and miscommunicated. With my partner on the horse, went for my aerial. Dismount off and hit my partner with my leg.

It changed my rotation in the air and I landed in a position that broke my back and severed my spinal cord. I became. Permanently paralyzed. From the waist down. I lost all feeling in control of my legs.

And my dreams for the future. Were crushed. My life drastically changed. I remember when the doctor Broke the news. I had a couple of Questions for him. The first. Was, will I be able to have children? And the second, can I ride horses again?

Now, I knew the first one. He said Yes, no problem. You can have children in the future. Great.

And then he just kind of gave me a blank stare for the second.

And luckily, my coach was there at the time, and. She not really sure what the answer was herself. Said Yes, Cambridge, you'll be able to ride again.

And that provided a little bit of hope and.

Comfort for the future.

But it was quickly replaced by fear.

I remember

just shortly after my first surgery having nightmares.

I'd be walking around doing things with family and friends like I had done before, when all of a sudden I would freeze

and my legs would collapse from underneath me. And I was left stranded.

I'd wake up and see my family and ask them, What are we doing here?

Hoping not to get the answer. I thought I was hoping they would say, Oh, you. Broke your leg, Bri, or.

You had really bad food poisoning.

I wanted to hear something other than the truth.

I wanted my paralysis to be a nightmare I could wake up from.

So I started therapy. And I remember the first first week of therapy.

Practicing with my physical Therapist. We were working on my balance.

And I sat on the edge of the mat.

With him. I wanted to see how long I could sit up on my own without following.

And I sat there working on my balance and I thought to myself.

Just last week, I was balancing a handstand on the back of a moving horse. And here I am. I can't even sit up on my own. Who am I?

I’m not Cambry Kaylor.

I'm a crippled version of what I used to be.

And who's going to want to be my friend or even date me when I go to college in the fall?

Surely no one. That knows me as a paraplegic. Just the people that knew me before.

So I thought, how am I going to get my old life back? I have to walk.

The doctor said it was impossible and scientists were. Still researching. Methods to hopefully one day cure my spinal cord.

But I figured I had to walk. I had to see my peers eye to eye and be at their level again.

So I did some research of my own and I found a personal trainer who taught paraplegics to walk. With braces and canes so you could be upright and walk.

So I spent nearly two years training.

Learning to walk again, and at my peak, I was able to cross about 50 feet in 5 minutes time.

So you can imagine as a sophomore on campus.

I didn't get very far.

And I was taking naps throughout the day just to keep my energy to be able to walk. And I would turn down social. Engagements and not hang out with friends. And fear that I was going. To slow them down. I didn’t want to be a burden. And every time I walked,

I ran the risk of slipping and falling and injuring the two extremities that I can use. And I thought. What am I doing? This isn't bringing me any joy.

I certainly don't have my old life back.

What am I doing? And I realized in that moment.

That I didn't have to walk to be happy.

I wasn't going to get my old life back. But I could create a new life full of happiness.

And that's what I was searching for all along, was. To be happy. So I went back to the place that made me the most happy. And that's the stables. I went back. First.

As a coach and love it. I still coach. I love it so much. I thought that if I could help others do dance and gymnastics on the back of a horse, that it would fill that horse. Part of my identity that I used to have, I didn't get on the. Horse hardly at all. Because I was afraid that I really wouldn't be able to do anything.

But one day my mom's. Writing partner didn't show. Up, and she asked me to sub. In and ride the horse.

I said yes, even though I didn't really want to. I was afraid. Like I said, I didn't want to get on and look like a fool because I couldn't even get the horse to move forward.

What commands with my legs could I give them?

And I didn't want to fall off. I didn't want to look like a fool.

But I got on the horse. I didn't fall off. We walked a little bit. We trot it a little bit. And then we ended in a figure Eight and I went home on cloud nine.

I thought, Oh, this piece of me has come back. I have part of my identity back. And I was so excited until I had this little bit of fear thinking, what if it was just an anomaly? Like, what if you just imagined. That that really didn’t happen? So I decided I had to figure out ight then and ask my mom to take my horse back to the stables with me. So we went back to the stables, put her in the cross ties,

and I went to go get the equipment. For her to get her ready.

My mom at the time found some friends and ran over and talked to them and I decided to get my horse ready by myself. So I went into the tack room, grabbed my tack. Brought it over. It's my horse and started brushing her down.

Put her pad on. That was easy. I went back to the tack. Room to grab the saddle, however.

And where do you think I found the saddle on the top saddle rack,

of course, two feet above my head.

So I looked around the tack room and found a pitchfork.

I grabbed the pitchfork.

Carefully, put the sharp end down,

and the other end I wedged under the saddle and pulled it to the edge,

grabbed it from the rack,

and then realized I couldn't put it on my lap because my wheels would get in the way and I would just be stuck there.

So I put it on the only logical place I could find, which was my head,

shoved it on my head, put the pitchfork down

and went out to my horse.

Put it up on her back, cinched her up.

Got the bridle on. We were ready to go.

By this time, my mom's friends had left, and she came over to see what she could do to help.

So we brought the horse over to the arena.

And when we got into the arena, we. Looked at each other and realized we didn’t know how I was going to get on the horse.

Her instructor had lifted me earlier.

And now we were the only two people at the barn. So my mom's at Cambridge.

You know. I know you just got her tacked up, but why don’t we come back. Another day when your brothers can help get you on, or. The instructor can come back and we'll get you on? I thought.

Are you kidding me? I just hacked her up on my own. This is. I'm writing.

So we looked around the arena and I saw some dirt. Some more dirt and even more dirt.

And then there was a fence.

So we put Opal on one side of the fence and I came over to the other side of the fence and thought, I'm strong enough I could do this.

Sure.

I grabbed on to the first. Rung and pulled myself up onto it. It was a lot harder than I thought it was.

My legs were just kind of dangling dead weight there. And I could hear the back of my mind, The nurses from my initial rehab. Telling me, Cambry, don’t ever sit on a hard surface because you could get a pressure sore. That takes weeks or even months to heal. Do not sit on a hard surface. I will keep climbing.

Got to the next rung and I must have been sweating profusely at this time and really right in the face because my mom looked at me and said. Cambrai, this is ridiculous. You're going to get hurt. Let's go home. I looked at her and said. Mom. I'm already paralyzed. What more could happen?

She didn't say much more. I climbed up, got over to. My horse, pulled myself through.

Grabbed my leg.

Pulled it over.

And sat upright on my horse.

We walked and trotted for about 2 minutes and ended in a figure eight.

It was real. I had that part of my identity back. So grateful.

Although I'm sure my horse got a good. Laugh as I climbed up that fence.

And laughter is something. I tend to use frequently because my life is just. A series of awkward.

Moments experiences. The most awkward one I can think of actually happened my sophomore year of college when I enrolled in an anatomy course. And as required, you have a lab with the anatomy.

And in the lab they have carefully dissected cadavers and they put them on huge trays on tables so that the students can learn.

And they're very thoughtful to have it at a height that when you're standing, you don’t have to lean over and hurt your back.

However, I don't stand. So I saw about this much of the cadaver and the TR.

Had a brilliant idea to grab the office chair.

Bring it out and crank it up to the top so I could beat. Hull like everybody else. Great.

He swooped me out of my chair, put me in the big chair, and then pushed me over to the table. I thought this guy was awesome. I was about to, like, bake him brownies or something because this was great.

Until I leaned a little too far.

And the wheels gave way and I landed in the cadaver. Yeah, not on the cadaver. In the cadaver. Cadaver juice all down the front of me.

Thankfully, I had goggles on.

Horrific.

I did not laugh at that moment. It was disgusting. It took a couple of months. Later, after the. Smell had finally gotten out of my hair and off my clothes, I threw them away.

It was horrific. But I did learn from that experience that maybe awkward. Horrible, unpleasant things can be funny. In the future. Now, when I first meet people or people first meet me.

They have a bunch of questions, right? I'm different. So they asked me.

How I got hurt. And they'll ask me, Can I live on my own? Can I drive a car? Do I miss doing the gymnastics on horseback? Yes, to all of those things. And then I get this question.

What if you could go back to that day and change it. So that you never got paralyzed?

Would you do it?

Well, 18 year old Cambridge would say yes in a heartbeat.

Yes, please. However, now,

looking back at all the experiences and lessons I've had since that day,

learning to love and accept myself regardless of my physical appearance.

Learning to find what makes me happy. And go after it, regardless of what.

Obstacle is in the way.

And to find humor in awkward and difficult situations.

It’s taught me to look at the big picture. And believe in God's plan instead of my plan.

Living with paralysis. Has taught me so much that I wouldn't change that day.

And it's those experiences and lessons I've learned that I can return to when I'm going through something difficult. I don't get that. Job that I really wanted or I got A poor grade or whatever it. Is that happens. I can look back and see where I've come from and what I've been through.

And it’s my hope tonight that all of you can take my experience

To help you when you're trying to find hope,

when you're struggling with something that you can remember. Me came the girl that fell. Off the horse and found a way to get back on. Thank you.

Living Beyond “What If?” | Cambry Kaylor

Description
Cambry Kaylor was a promising equestrian vaulter with dreams of competing internationally. At age 18 she suffered an accident while vaulting, leaving her a paraplegic, but that didn’t stop her from achieving her dreams.
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