I had been thinking about suicide for a long time. I didn't believe that there was a chance for me to not only get help and get sober, but be a good person. I just wanted to die. I was ashamed that this football player, this NFL guy that brought my parents so much joy, had now brought them so much sadness.

It was one of the biggest games of the year. We were playing Nebraska. First play of the game, they hand me the ball off at the 2-yard line, and I take it 50 yards. And then we drive down, and I score a touchdown. That drive, it was just a cool, cool experience. I was invited to the NFL combine, and then I got a call from Andy Reid, saying that they were going to take me 240th pick, in the seventh round of the draft. That year, I had a really good year playing for the Eagles. Towards the end of the season, I could barely walk. You know, my knees were hurting. My head was hurting. My shoulders were hurting. My body had just given up. I was so banged up that after games I would start taking pain pills to numb the pain. That progressed into taking it for practice, and from then on I believed that I couldn't play without pills. My vision of who and what I wanted started to become clouded. I started to take more pills. I was hiding this from my wife and hiding this from everyone around me. Through a series of events, my wife had found out that I was lying, and so she kicked me out of the house. She started to tell me that she was meeting with a lawyer, that she was getting papers written up for us to get a divorce. I couldn't believe it. I didn't know what to do. I tried to get sober for a while. I failed every time. I thought maybe heroin was a good idea at this point and maybe I should just start using more. That was the answer in my head at that moment. I had 180 pills, and I just remember thinking, "What's the use?" So I took all those pills, and I just remember waking up in a hospital. At that moment, I got on my knees and I prayed. And I don't really remember what I said, but I asked, "Can you help me, please, if you're there?" And I started to feel the love of Heavenly Father and the joy that I had never felt before. I remember the weight that was lifted off my shoulders. I started to feel some peace, that I was going to be OK. I found this hope, and it grew. From then on, my relationship with Heavenly Father was constant. I knew that I needed Him. The only way for me to find peace was a power greater than myself. Now I have an opportunity to show my kids, like my father showed me, what hard work is, what love is, how a relationship with God can strengthen a family. I can show them that with help, anything is possible.