Listen Carefully and Prayerfully

Carefully listen, observe, and discern in order to understand the true intent of students’ questions, feelings, and beliefs.

Suggestions

• Create an environment where students feel safe to discuss concerns.

• Prayerfully listen to the Spirit and to your students in order to better discern how to address students’ questions.

• Ask questions that invite students to share how they feel about their concerns.

Additional Resources

The Preach My Gospel manual offers the following advice:

“When you listen carefully to others, you understand them better. When they know that their thoughts and feelings are important to you, they are more likely to be receptive to your teachings, share personal experiences, and make commitments. As you listen, you will be able to more effectively adapt your teaching to their needs and interests.

“Especially listen for the whisperings of the Spirit. As others share their feelings with you, thoughts or ideas may enter your mind that are directed by the Spirit. You will also be able to understand what others are trying to express. . . .

“Sometimes people’s concerns are like an iceberg. Only a small portion is visible above the surface. These concerns can be complex and difficult to resolve. For this reason you need to follow the Spirit and respond in a manner best suited to the situation. Pray for the gift of discernment and follow your impressions. Heavenly Father knows the hearts and experiences of all people (the complete iceberg) and will help you know what is best for each person.

“When you help others resolve their concerns, first seek to understand their concerns by asking questions and listening. Rely on the Spirit to help you know how to help them resolve their concerns” (Preach My Gospel: A Guide to Missionary Service [2004], 185, 187).

President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency taught, “You and I can do better if we do not stay long with what our students see as the source of their doubts. We must listen long enough to show that we care, that we understand, and that we are not troubled by what troubles them. But their problem does not lie in what they think they see; it lies in what they cannot yet see. . . . And so we do best if we turn the conversation soon to the things of the heart, those changes of the heart that open spiritual eyes” (Henry B. Eyring, “And Thus We See: Helping a Student in a Moment of Doubt” [evening with a General Authority, Feb. 5, 1993], 4).

Respond with love and a desire to help.

Suggestions

• Be genuine as you seek to understand students’ needs. Respond to them with sensitivity and compassion, and let them know that their questions are important to you.

•  As students counsel with you about their questions and their efforts to seek guidance from the Lord, express gratitude for their trust in you.

• Avoid being rushed in your responses.

Additional Resources

President Thomas S. Monson counseled, “Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved” (Thomas S. Monson, “Finding Joy in the Journey,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2008, 86).

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles related the following story: “A 14-year-old boy recently said to me a little hesitantly, ‘Brother Holland, I can’t say yet that I know the Church is true, but I believe it is.’ I hugged that boy until his eyes bulged out. I told him with all the fervor of my soul that belief is a precious word, an even more precious act, and he need never apologize for ‘only believing.’ I told him that Christ Himself said, ‘Be not afraid, only believe’ [Mark 5:36], a phrase which, by the way, carried young Gordon B. Hinckley into the mission field [see Gordon B. Hinckley, in Conference Report, Oct. 1969, 114]. I told this boy that belief was always the first step toward conviction and that the definitive articles of our collective faith forcefully reiterate the phrase ‘We believe’ [see Articles of Faith 1:1–13]. And I told him how very proud I was of him for the honesty of his quest” (Jeffrey R. Holland, “Lord, I Believe,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2013, 94–95).

Determine how and when the question might best be answered.

Suggestions

• Discern the best time and place to answer questions. Concerns of general interest could be addressed in class, while those specific to a particular student may be better answered at another time.

• Invite students to share their concerns with parents, priesthood leaders, or others who will help build faith.

Additional Resources

Jesus Christ taught this doctrine:

“Therefore, verily I say unto you, lift up your voices unto this people; speak the thoughts that I shall put into your hearts, and you shall not be confounded before men;

“For it shall be given you in the very hour, yea, in the very moment, what ye shall say.

“But a commandment I give unto you, that ye shall declare whatsoever thing ye declare in my name, in solemnity of heart, in the spirit of meekness, in all things.

“And I give unto you this promise, that inasmuch as ye do this the Holy Ghost shall be shed forth in bearing record unto all things whatsoever ye shall say” (Doctrine and Covenants 100:5–8).

Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught members of the Church how they can respond to criticism or attacks on their faith. The principles he taught can also apply to teachers who are learning to respond appropriately to students’ questions:

“As we respond to others, each circumstance will be different. Fortunately, the Lord knows the hearts of [others] and how we can most effectively respond to them. As true disciples seek guidance from the Spirit, they receive inspiration tailored to each encounter. And in every encounter, true disciples respond in ways that invite the Spirit of the Lord. . . .

“Questions and criticisms give us an opportunity to reach out to others and demonstrate that they matter to our Heavenly Father and to us. Our aim should be to help them understand the truth, not defend our egos or score points in a theological debate. Our heartfelt testimonies are the most powerful answer we can give. . . . And such testimonies can only be borne in love and meekness” (Robert D. Hales, “Christian Courage: The Price of Discipleship,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2008, 73–74).