Three-part Harmony

Early in our marriage, my husband and I decided we wanted to avoid conflict over each other’s annoying habits. So we each listed three of our spouse’s habits that bothered us most. We decided in advance that we could only bring up small differences that each of us could overcome with a little thought and effort.

We chose actions such as hanging up wet towels, turning clothes right-side-out to be laundered, remembering to kiss each other before we parted, and dating regularly.

We promised each other we would work on these three little things as long as the other person would allow all the other annoying habits to go unnoticed. In this way we were able to please each other in small ways and to avoid tension over the unimportant.

After we mastered the first three requests, we chose three more. Now, in thirteen years, we’ve improved ourselves, learned those things we appreciate about each other, and become more united in our marriage.

It’s also a good idea to report on three habits or practices of our spouse that we really appreciate.—Ellen Gabrielsen King, West Jordan, Utah

Photography by Phil Shurtleff