A Living, Growing Thing

Little problems in marriage can grow to become destructive wedges if we do nothing to keep them in perspective. My husband and I have found this to be especially true when we have slacked off on having dates or spending one-on-one time together. The less time we spend together, the more those petty annoyances—little thorns in the garden of marriage—take on unrealistic importance. It is better to concentrate on the roses: the beauties around us in our day-to-day life.

Sharing time together, particularly on dates, enhances our ability to overcome those little annoyances. But with the demands of rearing a family, employment, Church callings, community service, and a multitude of other obligations, it is all too easy to let date time get crowded out if we don’t stay vigilant in emphasizing its priority. We also find other ways to spend time together. After nine children and more than 20 years of marriage, my husband and I still sit side by side at church, in the car, and wherever else we go. We are still each other’s favorite companions. But that didn’t just happen. It requires thought, determination, and work to make time for each other on a regular basis.

An eternal marriage relationship, like faith, is a living, growing thing and needs to be nurtured. Our weekly date is a good base from which our marriage can grow.—Valerie Wright, Bluffdale First Ward, Bluffdale Utah Stake