“Go and Do; Then You Will Know,” Ensign, February 2018
Young Adults
Go and Do; Then You Will Know
The author lives in Arkansas, USA.
I wanted a clear confirmation that I was marrying the right person, but an answer didn’t seem to come.
Illustration by Karla Alcazar
As a young single adult, I was terrified of marrying the wrong person. Knowing that the Holy Ghost guides our decisions when we are living righteously, I expected a strong answer from the Spirit telling me whom I should marry. I felt that receiving that kind of witness from the Spirit would calm my fears.
After dating a young man for over a year, I fell in love with him. I made my decision to marry him and then asked for a witness from the Holy Ghost. I prayed, fasted, and went to the temple but received no answer. My first inclination was to increase my obedience. So I worked on being more faithful in my Church calling, asked for a priesthood blessing, and increased my temple attendance.
Months passed, and no clear answer came. My fears and anxieties grew. I began studying many talks on receiving revelation. I finally came across a talk given by Elder Richard G. Scott (1928–2015) of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles that helped me understand why I hadn’t received an answer:
“When [Heavenly Father] answers yes, it is to give us confidence.
“When He answers no, it is to prevent error.
“When He withholds an answer, it is to have us grow through faith in Him, obedience to His commandments, and a willingness to act on truth. We are expected to assume accountability by acting on a decision that is consistent with His teachings without prior confirmation. We are not to sit passively waiting or to murmur because the Lord has not spoken. We are to act.
“… If, in trust, we begin something which is not right, He will let us know before we have gone too far.”1
These words of wisdom from Elder Scott gave me the courage to keep moving forward.
But the closer the wedding day came, the more I panicked. The night before, my prayers went something like this: “Heavenly Father, I am getting married tomorrow and I am scared to death! I still don’t know if this is the right thing to do! I have done all that I can to be worthy to receive guidance from the Spirit. Will You do Your part and help me know if I should go through with this?” I still felt no answer as to whether it was right to marry my fiancé, but I felt an assurance that Heavenly Father heard my prayers, loved me, and wouldn’t let me go astray without letting me know.
We were married on January 2, 2010, in the Salt Lake Temple. Soon we found out we were expecting our first child. We were thrilled, but at the time I was a full-time student involved in student government, had a few Church callings, and was battling severe morning sickness. My husband graciously did all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, and errands. He also provided me with encouragement, entertainment, and humor.
One particular morning I was very discouraged and ill. Rather than rest, I had to go to school to take an important exam. I was depressed physically, mentally, and spiritually. With tears rolling down my cheeks, I prayed and pleaded for help that I might endure the day.
A few minutes after I ended my prayer, a sudden peace flooded my heart and body. Through the power of the Holy Ghost, I was able to see the past few weeks with different eyes. I saw my husband in a way I had never seen him when we were dating. I saw what a tremendous blessing he had been to me and how much I needed him by my side. Deep gratitude and love filled my soul for my husband as well as my Heavenly Father for giving me the confirmation I had been seeking. A voice then came to my mind telling me that I had married the right person.
Since then, I have received similar confirmations from the Spirit, reassuring me again and again that marrying my husband was not only the right thing to do but also the best decision I have made. I know that Heavenly Father hears and answers every prayer in His own time and His own way. I know that as we live righteously and seek His guidance, He will guide our path in selecting an eternal companion. He truly loves us and knows what is best for us.