Riddles and Jokes

Why did the lady go outdoors with her purse open? Because she expected some change in the weather.

What is the hardest work some people do before breakfast? Getting up.

Where will you find the center of gravity? At the letter V.

What is the best way to make a fire with two sticks? Make sure one of them is a match.

Two leopards in the zoo had just finished eating their lunch. One sat back and sighed with contentment: “Mm-mm-mm! That just hit the right spots!”

If you were surrounded by twenty lions, fifteen tigers, and ten leopards, how would you get away from them? Stop the merry-go-round and get off.

I have cities with no houses, forests without trees, rivers without water. What am I? A map.

How can two people stand two inches apart without being able to touch each other? Close the door between them.

What is the only nail a carpenter hates to hit with his hammer? His fingernail.

What city is for telegraph operators? Electricity.

What is the coldest row in the theater? Z row (zero).