“A Surprising Stress-Fighting Tool,” For the Strength of Youth, Aug. 2021, 6–7.
A Surprising Stress-Fighting Tool
Is life stressing you out? Here’s something that might help.
Illustrations by Corey Egbert
When life feels chaotic, it’s a common strategy to duck for cover and shift into survival mode. Especially if we’re feeling stressed out or anxious. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, then-Second Counselor in the First Presidency, once talked about this in terms of trees and airplane turbulence. In both examples, when times get tough, the best solution is to slow down. Trees grow slower in years without ideal conditions. That’s why some growth rings are smaller. Similarly, airline pilots decrease speed when air becomes bumpy.
“The wise understand and apply the lessons of tree rings and air turbulence,” President Uchtdorf taught. “They resist the temptation to get caught up in the frantic rush of everyday life.”1
Taking steps to reduce a frantic pace makes a lot of sense. Here’s something that really helps, though it might not be obvious at first glance:
Setting goals can help you slow things down.
The Ups and Downs of Goals
Some people love setting goals. They have big dreams and plenty of drive to get there. But others find goal-setting to be intimidating and stressful, especially when life isn’t running smoothly. Considering President Uchtdorf’s advice, trying to set goals might feel like one more thing that you just can’t manage. “Sorry, universe! It’s time to slow down, and that means no new goals!”
Here’s the intriguing part, though. When things are unpredictable and hectic, that’s actually when setting goals can help you the most—and not just in terms of “getting stuff done.” The very process of setting and pursuing goals can help you feel less anxious and more at peace. That said, there are a few pointers to keep in mind.
Reducing Chaos Bit by Bit
One strategy to keep in mind is to avoid trying to do too much at once. President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency has taught: “Most of us have had some experience with self-improvement efforts. My experience has taught me this about how people and organizations improve: the best place to look is for small changes we could make in things we do often. There is power in steadiness and repetition.”2
Goals that are too big or that will take a long time to accomplish often feel hard to act on here and now. However, there’s a sweet spot in timelines for goals, and that’s right around 7 to 10 days.
Breaking your big goals up into roughly week-sized chunks has a lot going for it. For one thing, it eliminates the panic of the overwhelmingly large expectations we put on ourselves. And then there’s the discouragement we often feel when we fall. Smaller timeframes can reduce those feelings.
A week is also a short enough period for you to see the light at the end of the tunnel. You know what you need to do here and now. And before you know it, you’ve finished off one piece of a bigger goal. And then another piece. Once you start making progress, a few successful weeks turn into serious momentum. And that’s where something powerful begins to happen.
Greater Peace, Smaller Bites
Let’s say you have a big goal ahead of you such as applying for college or university. For some of us, the many steps this requires can feel overwhelming.
But you only need to tackle one bite-sized chunk at a time. For this goal, that might mean starting with choosing at least two schools you want to apply to.
Over the next week, all you’d have to do is identify those schools. Then, in week two, perhaps you decide to research the college application timeline for those schools. During week three you might talk to an academic counselor or start outlining college application essays or other written requirements.
This momentum can pick up steam rather quickly. Things suddenly feel doable. That once-daunting goal is now not nearly so scary. In fact, you might feel excited!
This process works with any big goals, no matter whether they’re spiritual, social, physical, or intellectual.
Children and Youth and You
The best part about goal setting is that you’ve already got an incredible resource in your back pocket. As you use Children and Youth to learn and grow as the Savior did, remember that any big goal you might have—like serving a mission, running a marathon, or learning a language—can be broken down into smaller, week-long steps.
Steady and manageable growth in balanced areas of your life leads to greater peace, not greater stress and hurry. You’ll be able to slow down with your increased focus and then enjoy life a bit more—one week at a time.