Youth Voices
My Eating Disorder vs. My True Identity
For a long time I struggled with an eating disorder called anorexia nervosa, where you eat less and less and worry about gaining weight. It affects you mentally—you start to feel guilty for eating and don’t understand your body’s needs. It didn’t help that I constantly saw unrealistic standards online or at school, and I compared myself to my family and others around me.
My eating disorder was definitely something I hid. But my mom noticed the changes in my eating habits. She sat down with me and gave me as much time as I needed to tell her what was going on. There were a lot of tears, but I think the Spirit helped guide her to know I needed help. Together, we made a plan and started gently working through it.
During that time, I also decided to get my patriarchal blessing. I wanted to know what my life could be like outside of the darkness that I was experiencing. I came in asking God, “Who am I?,” “Do You love me?,” and “Why am I here?” The first thing the patriarch said was an answer to those questions. My blessing helps me learn about my true identity and what God has in store for me. Whenever I read it, I feel the Savior’s love for me and remember what I can become with Him.
Even with the support of my patriarchal blessing, my family, my Heavenly Father, and my Savior, it took me a long time to process the feelings I had about my body. It’s still hard sometimes to accept myself for who I am and the way I look. But because of my dark times, I am starting to appreciate the growth and light that come from recognizing my true identity. I’m a daughter of Heavenly Father. I’m a disciple of Jesus Christ. They look upon me with love and encouragement, and that matters more than anyone else’s opinion.
Annalise B., age 17, Georgia, USA
Enjoys working at her hospital internship and creating art and music to honor God and His creations.