Q. What should I teach my children about bearing their testimonies?

Susan Zmolek, mother of five and Stake Relief Society education counselor:

I think it would be wise for parents to teach their children what a testimony is, why it should be shared, and when to share it.

To members of the Church, a testimony is a very personal expression of what one individual knows to be true, specifically bearing witness of the divinity and mission of Jesus Christ, of Joseph Smith’s calling as a prophet, and of the present prophet’s divine calling. The General Handbook explains: “Every encouragement should be given to the bearing of brief, heartfelt testimonies and the relating of faith-promoting experiences. Preachments; travelogues; long, drawn-out narratives of experiences; and routine, repetitious statements should be discouraged” (General Handbook of Instructions, no. 21 [1976], p. 23.)

Children cannot learn these true principles just by listening to the varied expressions of adults in testimony meeting. Parents need to use family home evening and private conversations to teach children about testimonies. An easy way to begin is to ask—perhaps at bedtime—what a testimony is. Parents have a responsibility to help their children enlarge their understanding, year by year, until they know what is appropriately included in a testimony.

A six-year-old can learn simple concepts—for example, that it is not appropriate for him to bear his testimony every fast meeting. A child can understand that the phrase “I love my Mommy”—however pleasing the thought—is not a testimony of the gospel. A child can also learn to say what is in his heart, rather than use routine expressions which lose meaning through repetition. If taught since childhood, a youth can understand the difference between a faith-promoting experience and what “really went on” at camp.

Children can also learn why they should share their testimonies. They can learn at an early age that they should bear testimony because the Holy Ghost prompts them to say what they know to be true. Ideally the agenda of a fast and testimony meeting is directed by the Holy Ghost. Parents and teachers should therefore be cautious in challenging their entire family or class to bear their testimonies at a meeting. Children should never be taught to bear their testimonies because of peer pressure, or to impress grandma, a boyfriend, or an idolized instructor.

When should a child bear his testimony? Many children mistakenly believe that fast meeting is their only opportunity to bear testimony. By example, parents can show them many other private opportunities. If parents frequently bear testimony to particular gospel principles in the course of family conversation, children likely will also express their feelings in conversations about the gospel. If dad relates at the dinner table how he bore his testimony of living prophets to a coworker, his children will be encouraged to share what they know with their nonmember friends. Parents can also provide regular opportunities to bear testimony in family home evening.

As in all gospel teaching, parents should strive to teach correct principles positively. They can emphasize what the child is doing right, even as they are working to enlarge his understanding. They can allow him to learn how to bear testimony, in the privacy of home. In this manner, a child will learn how and when to bear testimony in private conversations and in more formal church meetings.