“How to Help Someone Searching for Answers to Gospel Questions,” Liahona, December 2021
Ministering Principles
How to Help Someone Searching for Answers to Gospel Questions
The search for answers is personal, but it doesn’t have to happen alone.
Everyone has questions. Questions are a part of how we understand the world around us. God encourages us to ask questions and to seek answers (see Matthew 7:7). This process is an essential part of life’s journey to learn and become more like Him (see Doctrine and Covenants 93:36). As part of that growth, we will all face questions that challenge us. When this happens, it can help to have the support of others.
A Church member in Texas, USA, shared this experience:
“During Relief Society one day, a sister I had never seen in church before shared how she felt like women in Relief Society were hypocritical and exclusive. After the meeting, she left so fast I couldn’t catch her.
“After church, I went to her home. I introduced myself and said I appreciated her comments in Relief Society and wanted to hear more about her concerns. She talked, and I listened. I expressed my love for her and her family and asked if I could visit her again.
“I took the assignment to serve as her visiting teacher. Over time, as I came to understand her concerns better, we began talking about her doctrinal questions. Her children started coming to church. Then she started coming with them. I admire her courage and perseverance. She has become one of my dearest friends.”
Here are four suggestions for how you can help someone who is struggling with his or her questions.
Ideas for Ministering to Those with Questions
1. Love above all. If someone is struggling with a question or has come to a different conclusion than we have, they still have the need for love (see Luke 10:25–37).
Those who are having a difficult time will turn to someone they trust. Loving others and building meaningful relationships can put us in a position to minister when they need us. It also opens the door for someone who wants to return but may feel uncomfortable coming back (see Luke 15:11–24).
(For ideas on strengthening relationships, read “Building Meaningful Relationships,” Ensign or Liahona, Aug. 2018, 6–9.)
2. Listen with humility and compassion. We limit our ability to help others with their questions if we too quickly assume that we understand rather than patiently listening to understand. There are many reasons someone may be struggling. Some have questions about doctrine. Others have questions about policy or history. Some simply wonder if they fit in the Church.
Humbly listening and asking questions will help us understand the complexities of their situation so we can give better answers, and it can help them be more open to our answers if they feel we have truly heard them.
(To learn how to listen better, read, “Five Things Good Listeners Do,” Ensign or Liahona, June 2018, 6–9.)
3. Persist in faith and recognize this may take time. The questions that truly challenge us are rarely resolved in a day. So we shouldn’t put additional pressure on ourselves or those we want to help by feeling like we need to “fix it” in the moment we learn of their concern.
If we really want to help, it’s important that we are prepared to walk a long road with them so they know that when they get to the end of that road, whatever end that may be, we’ll still be there (see Hebrews 12:12–13).
4. Encourage them in their journey. They need to know we have confidence in them and faith that God will answer their prayers as they seek His direction. But ultimately, this is their journey. We can love and support them, but the process of growing through trusting God and turning to Him for answers is one that each of us must experience for ourselves and cannot do for another (see Mormon 9:27).