I Believed in Jesus Christ, but I Wasn’t Sure If He Truly Knew Me

By Jad Holland

As I worked as an extra on a popular Christian television series about Jesus Christ, I got an answer to a prayer.

Even though I’ve grown up in the Church, I’ve still had to learn to love Jesus Christ and understand who He is to me. When I was in my 20s, I decided to make sure I had a strong gospel foundation—and then build on it.

I wanted to know for certain if Jesus Christ knows me personally—if His Atonement really does apply to me.

Around the time I was struggling through some of these things, I saw an opening to act as an extra on a popular TV show about the life of Jesus Christ. I applied immediately. This was an opportunity I couldn’t miss.

Turning to the Lord on Set

“OK, everyone, we’re going to do it again,” called out the man in charge of the extras.

A groan went up among the masses of people surrounding me. Creating this show turned out to be a lot more complicated than I’d expected. We’d been there for almost eight hours, shooting the same scene repeatedly, and the directors weren’t happy with the shots. All of us extras were more than happy to be there and see the actor portraying Jesus bring our Savior to life. But still, eight hours was a long time to sit and perform the same scene.

While we waited to start another take, I looked out over the crowd, wondering how many religions and nationalities were represented across this wide multitude of people. It was an incredible sight, knowing so many of these people had traveled far to be here today.

And all because they loved Jesus Christ.

“Action!” someone shouted, and we started again.

Only a few minutes later, the cry of “Cut!” went up again, followed by another announcement that we were resetting back to starting positions. The crowd murmured their discontent, but we prepared for another take.

It was frustrating to have to get in and out of character so many times, and I was nervous that we would be running through this scene until nightfall.

That’s when an older man stood up and shouted, “We’re all followers of Jesus Christ. We all believe in Jesus Christ. We’re trying to do this by ourselves, and it’s not working. We need to pray. We need to ask God for help, because just trying to do this by ourselves is clearly not working.”

He began to pray out loud.

Suddenly, all five hundred of the extras were praying, each in our own language and in our own way. Even the cast and crew stopped and joined us.

So I decided to pray too.

My Prayer of Faith

As I knelt to pray, I thought about my own struggles and my own need to know that the Savior knows me and really can help me throughout my life. I prayed to Heavenly Father for a miracle not only on set but also in my life. I prayed to notice and feel the Lord’s hand.

When I finished, I lifted my head and looked around. Everything I’d been worrying about seemed to become still, and I felt a profound peace. As I watched all these Christians in their different roles, I felt like I was taken back to Jerusalem, like I was there to hear the teachings of the Messiah.

I felt the Spirit speak to my heart that the Savior knew me personally, the same as He knew every person around me.

I felt what Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles reminded us of when He said: “I believe the Savior Jesus Christ would want you to see, feel, and know that He is your strength. That with His help, there are no limits to what you can accomplish. That your potential is limitless. He would want you to see yourself the way He sees you.”

Realizing this changed my faith for the better.

That Was the One

When the cast finished their prayer, we began to shoot the scene again, and the moment “Cut!” was called, we all knew this final shot was the take they needed.

Production moved on, but nobody forgot that sweet experience of kneeling together. We had all chosen to be there because we all loved Jesus Christ, and our faith had produced a miracle!

That day, I went home feeling in my heart that my prayers had been answered. I knew that Heavenly Father had blessed me with a knowledge that He and Jesus Christ love me, see my efforts, and are supporting me. I could feel the Savior’s power driving me forward and lifting me up.

If you want to better feel Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ’s love and power in your life, ask. And then act in faith—the Spirit will lead you to the answers you’re seeking.