Lesson 6 Class Preparation Material

Marriage between a Man and a Woman Is Ordained of God

The family proclamation begins with the solemn declaration that “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” ChurchofJesusChrist.org). Have you ever considered why prophets, apostles, and other Church leaders continually teach this truth? As you study this lesson, consider how exercising faith in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ can help you in your approach toward marriage.

Section 1

How does knowing Heavenly Father’s perspective on marriage help me understand His plan for me?

In recent years, views on marriage have changed in many societies. What are some opinions you have heard recently?

Not long after the Church was organized, Leman Copley wanted missionaries to preach the gospel to members of his former religious group, the Shakers. The Shakers rejected marriage, instead believing in a life of total celibacy. The Prophet Joseph Smith asked the Lord about this and other beliefs and received a revelation.

Study in Preparation for Class

Read Doctrine and Covenants 49:15–16, looking for what the Lord declared about marriage.

As used in verse 15, ordain means to order, establish, or appoint by virtue of superior authority (see Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, “ordain”; consider making a note of this definition in your scriptures). Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles emphasized the importance of marriage between a man and a woman when he taught:

A family built on the marriage of a man and woman supplies the best setting for God’s plan to thrive—the setting for the birth of children, who come in purity and innocence from God, and the environment for the learning and preparation they will need for a successful mortal life and eternal life in the world to come. …

… It is [God] who in the beginning created Adam and Eve in His image, male and female, and joined them as husband and wife. … Each individual carries the divine image, but it is in the matrimonial union of male and female as one that we attain perhaps the most complete meaning of our having been made in the image of God—male and female. Neither we nor any other mortal can alter this divine order of matrimony. It is not a human invention. Such marriage is indeed “from above, from God” [see Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison, ed. Eberhard Bethge (1953), 42–43] and is as much a part of the plan of happiness as the Fall and the Atonement. (“Why Marriage, Why Family,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2015, 52)

Marriage according to God’s law is the most sacred relationship that can exist between a man and a woman. President Howard W. Hunter explained:

Man is not complete without woman. Neither can fill the measure of their creation without the other [see 1 Corinthians 11:11; Moses 3:18]. Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God [see Doctrine and Covenants 49:15–17]. Only through the new and everlasting covenant of marriage can they realize the fulness of eternal blessings [see Doctrine and Covenants 131:1–4; Doctrine and Covenants 132:15–19]. (“Being a Righteous Husband and Father,” Ensign, Nov. 1994, 49)

Those who enter into and keep the new and everlasting covenant of marriage can obtain the highest degree of glory in the celestial kingdom (see Doctrine and Covenants 131:1–4). This is where we “realize the fulness of eternal blessings,” also known as exaltation or eternal life. (You will learn more about the new and everlasting covenant of marriage in lesson 10.)

Recall what you have learned in previous lessons about the nature of eternal life. Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught:

The Father’s plan provides us the way to inherit eternal life, the life our heavenly parents lead. In the plan, “neither is the man without the woman, [nor] the woman without the man, in the Lord” [1 Corinthians 11:11]. The very essence of eternal life includes the eternal marriage of man and woman, which is an essential part of becoming like our heavenly parents. (“The Plan of Salvation: A Sacred Treasure of Knowledge to Guide Us,” Ensign, Oct. 2015, 29)

Ponder in Preparation for Class

How would you explain why marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and essential to His eternal plan?

Section 2

What if I don’t get married in this life or my marriage ends?

Due to various circumstances, some people never marry in this life despite their righteous desires. For some who do marry, their marriage ends in divorce. President Dallin H. Oaks of the First Presidency addressed these circumstances when he taught:

Some who are listening to this message are probably saying, “But what about me?” We know that many worthy and wonderful Latter-day Saints currently lack the ideal opportunities and essential requirements for their progress. Singleness, childlessness, death, and divorce frustrate ideals and postpone the fulfillment of promised blessings. … But these frustrations are only temporary. The Lord has promised that in the eternities no blessing will be denied his sons and daughters who keep the commandments, are true to their covenants, and desire what is right. (“The Great Plan of Happiness,” Ensign, Nov. 1993, 75)

Though some eternal blessings may not be fully experienced in this life, happiness and fulfillment are not on hold for those who are not married. (This topic will be discussed further in a later lesson.) Everyone can experience lasting joy and meaningful growth and make needed contributions now as fully active participants in God’s plan and kingdom.

Ponder in Preparation for Class

What would you share with those who feel like their opportunities for happiness and eternal life have been forfeited because they are not married?

Section 3

How can exercising faith in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ help me overcome fear and experience joy in marriage?

Think about questions or concerns you or those around you have about getting married. Elder Quentin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles addressed one reason some people delay their efforts to marry:

Some postpone marriage until education is complete and a job obtained. While widely accepted in the world, this reasoning does not demonstrate faith, does not comply with counsel of modern prophets, and is not compatible with sound doctrine. (“Choose Wisely,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2014, 47)

The adversary often amplifies fears, mortal reasoning, or distractions that can keep people from pursuing marriage. Some people experience fear before or during marriage because they have witnessed challenges that come from divorce. (In upcoming lessons, you will learn principles that can help you strengthen your marriage and prevent divorce.)

What can help you approach marriage with confidence?

Study in Preparation for Class

Read Proverbs 3:5–6; 2 Timothy 1:7; and Doctrine and Covenants 6:36. Consider how these teachings can apply to how you approach marriage.

President Jean B. Bingham, Relief Society General President, taught:

Sometimes we are afraid to trust because we don’t understand God’s absolute love and desire to help us. But when we study Heavenly Father’s plan and Jesus Christ’s mission, we understand that Their only objective is our eternal happiness and progress [see Moses 1:39]. (“That Your Joy Might Be Full,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2017, 86)

As individuals marry and as both spouses continue to exercise faith, Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ will continue to guide and bless them. Elder Hugh W. Pinnock taught while serving as a member of the Seventy, “God was vitally involved with [Adam and Eve’s] marriage, and he is just as concerned and should be just as involved in every marriage today” (“Making a Marriage Work,” Ensign, Sept. 1981, 37). Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ want to help you succeed in building an eternal marriage.

Record Your Thoughts

President Bonnie H. Cordon, Young Women General President, noted, “We must each ask: How do I keep centered and lean not unto my own understanding? How do I recognize and follow the Savior’s voice when the voices of the world are so compelling? How do I cultivate trust in the Savior?” (“Trust in the Lord and Lean Not,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2017, 6). Record your thoughts about President Cordon’s questions as they relate to marriage. Also consider if there is anything holding you back from pursuing (or more actively pursuing) an eternal marriage.

Want More? (Optional)

How can marriage help my spouse and me become who God intends for us to become?

In the video “Renaissance of Marriage: To Become as One” (2:35), President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency explained how being married to Sister Eyring has helped him “become every good thing [he] ever wanted to be.”

Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught about how marriage according to God’s law can help us overcome selfishness and realize our potential in “The Divine Pattern of Eternal Marriage” (Ensign, Sept. 2020, 34–41).

How can I overcome any fears I have about marriage or resist unnecessarily putting it off?

In his talk “Be Not Afraid, Only Believe” (evening with a General Authority, Feb. 6, 2015, ChurchofJesusChrist.org), Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles noted some of the fears young adults have about marriage and reasons for delaying it. He also shared how he and his wife Patricia moved forward in faith in marrying each other.

In what circumstances might divorce be justified?

At the time of the Savior’s mortal ministry, there were some Jewish leaders who argued that divorce was justified for even trivial reasons. The Savior addressed their mindset and taught about the sacred nature of marriage (see Matthew 19:3–9). In his talk “Divorce” (Ensign or Liahona, May 2007, 70–73), President Dallin H. Oaks addressed circumstances in which divorce may be justified. He also provided counsel regarding how to avoid divorce.