“Questions and Answers: Feeling Alone,” New Era, Mar. 2014, 42–43
Questions & Answers
You might be surprised at how common this feeling is. But that doesn’t make it any less hard. Try to surround yourself with good people and uplifting activities, even when it’s difficult. Sometimes just focusing on activities, like Mutual nights, school games, or aerobic activities, can help take your mind off your trials.
Remember that Heavenly Father loves you and that you are never truly alone. So be sure to pray and study the gospel. Never give up on your relationship with Heavenly Father, because He never gives up on you.
Also remember that the Savior understands our lives completely and knows how to help us (see Alma 7:11–13). As we turn to Him, He will give us strength to overcome our challenges through the enabling power of the Atonement. Consider learning more about the Atonement and how it can help you in times like these (see page 6).
Sometimes it also helps to find someone to talk to, like a parent, leader, or trusted friend. Although your exact circumstances may be different from theirs, parents and trusted leaders can help us learn from their similar experiences and give good advice for the future.
If your feelings of loneliness last a long time or get worse, it could be a sign of a more serious issue, like depression. Be sure to talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling. There’s absolutely no shame in getting help (see Jeffrey R. Holland, “Like a Broken Vessel,” Ensign, Nov., 2013, 40; lds.org/go/lonelyNE3).
Turn to God
It’s normal to feel this way; it’s a part of life. You have to pray constantly to have the Spirit with you. His mission is to comfort us, and through Him you’ll know without any doubt that the Savior has gone through your sufferings. Even when nobody seems to understand, He understands, and He won’t leave you alone. If you’re having a hard time, remember that there’s a purpose to it and that Heavenly Father won’t leave you to handle it on your own if you turn to Him.
Mariana L., 17, Quebec, Canada
Fear Not
When I feel like nobody understands what I’m going through, I remember the hymn “How Firm a Foundation,” especially verse three: “Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed, for I am thy God and will still give thee aid. I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand” (Hymns, no. 85). This message serves as a constant reminder that my Heavenly Father loves and cares for me.
Rachel F., 13, Arizona, USA
Stand in Holy Places
If you pray diligently and prayerfully study the scriptures, you’ll understand you aren’t alone and you’ll come through this trial stronger and more faithful. Listen to the Spirit’s promptings and always remember to “stand ye in holy places, and be not moved” (D&C 87:8).
Kellen L., 14, New Mexico, USA
Seek Peace
When I feel alone and that nobody understands me, I try to always remember that my Heavenly Father loves me. When I think this, it brings peace and makes me feel like I’m not alone.
Allison H., 14, Oregon, USARealize
You’re Unique
What often helps me is realizing that I’m unique. By making this a positive thing, I can feel better about myself and not get so frustrated when people don’t understand me. They just think different from me, and Heavenly Father has made them unique as well.
Jeshua M., 14, New Zealand
Reach Out
When I struggled with this, I found that as I served others and shared the gospel, my joy was hugely increased. The Lord understood me, and He comforted me and was proud of me. As I have gained a testimony of the happiness and comfort that comes from sharing the gospel and showing others they are loved—even when I need love myself—my life has become brighter and my desire to serve even stronger.
Sawyer I., 16, Tennessee, USA
Talk to Someone
Talk to your parents and Church leaders. They may not have gone through exactly what you’re going through, but they can understand. Don’t be afraid to let them know how you feel; it’s one of their roles as parents and leaders to help you.
Beka W., 15, Texas, USA
Focus on Others
I try to turn my attention away from myself and toward the needs of other people through service. I’ve found that in forgetting myself, I’ve felt happier and more included. I know that service can bring you closer to God and closer to others. If you feel alone, go out and serve.
Aza M., 17, New Jersey, USA
Remember God’s Plan
Remember that your Father in Heaven has a plan specifically for you. Everything you endure has a purpose and can be used to strengthen your testimony if you turn to Him and the Savior for help.
Ethan I., 15, Washington, USA