For Mothers of Young Children
Moms Facing Uncertainty: You Never Walk Alone
Facing developmental delays with my toddler showed me how much the Savior loves and strengthens us.
Photograph from Pexels
I always imagined motherhood would consist of running late to soccer games and having meaningful conversations on road trips. Instead, I grab cheap hamburgers on the way to speech therapy to be eaten quickly in the parking lot before sending my little toddler off to a session. Twice a week. For over two years.
When he said “eat” for the first time, I burst into tears of joy. (He was requesting a cracker!) It might sound silly to get emotional, but moments of accomplishment were magnified because it took hours of therapy and conferences to get us to that point.
I sincerely wish dealing with developmental delays was always jam-packed with joyful moments like this. But I experience many more moments of concern. Between tests and retests and therapy, my mind is always wandering. I often ask myself the same questions: “How will he be prepared for school?” and “Will his peers make fun of his lack of communication skills?”
I have wept over my son. I have wept over our progress. I have wept over unanswered questions and the long journey we still have ahead of us.
The perfect motherhood I envisioned has slipped through my fingers and been filled with lots of challenges. I have spent countless nights in desperate prayer with Heavenly Father, begging Him to help my son and to enable me to trust Him. I always hoped for a sudden miracle that his speech would magically improve overnight. But I was also frustrated and didn’t understand why I had to experience this, when so many mothers didn’t.
“I’ll Talk with You”
On one particularly stressful day, tensions were high in our home and I lost my temper with my son. To calm down, I sat him on my lap and started to rock him in our rocking chair. Typically, I’d enter my repertoire of Mother Goose songs and sing (horribly) to him until we both calmed down. This time, however, the words of a primary song from the Children’s Songbook sprang to mind:
If you don’t talk as most people do,
Some people talk and laugh at you,
But I won’t! I won’t!
I’ll walk with you. I’ll talk with you.
That’s how I’ll show my love for you.1
Tears filled my eyes. The words in the song accurately described some of the simple decencies I prayed my son would receive from his peers every day.
I imagined the Savior understanding and conversing with my son. Even when verbal communication wasn’t possible, I imagined Christ communicating with him through the most foundational connection—love.
Sister Michelle D. Craig, First Counselor in the Young Women General Presidency, once said: “Jesus Christ sees people deeply. He sees individuals, their needs, and who they can become.”2
Where many might see a challenge or a burden, Jesus Christ sees through the lens of adoration and devotion. He knows our struggles and our circumstances, and He walks with us. He and Heavenly Father are with us in those seemingly small and simple moments, and They always choose to love us perfectly.
And as that Primary song continues:
In that moment, on that little rocking chair, I decided I would too.
Despite this trial, I would choose to love others like my Savior loves. That might mean cheering for my little one when he learns new sounds. Perhaps it’s showing up day after day to drive him to speech therapy. It might look like advocating for him and resolving to be kinder and more compassionate to everyone, no matter their circumstances. Because that’s what the Savior would do.
My favorite title for Christ has always been “Advocate.” He reminds us to “Lift up [our] hearts and be glad, for I am in your midst, and am your advocate with the Father” (Doctrine and Covenants 29:5). Reflecting on the role of the Savior as our Advocate with the Father inspired me to think about ways I can advocate for my loved one in righteous ways.
We Do Not Walk Alone
This experience on the rocking chair reminded me of how our Father in Heaven is so aware of our needs. In that moment, I was feeling so alone in the overwhelm of parenting, but He ensured that the Spirit brought those specific lyrics to mind. And I was led to remember the Savior’s mission to stand as an Advocate before the Father for those who have followed Him.
He continues to represent and sustain me—a mom who feels like she has no idea what she’s doing half the time. He offers me grace in my shortcomings. He’s patient with me and forgives me, even when I get frustrated. He also loves and advocates for my son. He rejoices for him and with him.
As we reach for Him, Christ will walk with us through moments when our expectations go unmet. When we receive heartbreaking diagnoses. When we face our lowest moments and depths of despair. And especially the good moments too. His advocacy is available to every one of us—from the tired mother to the lowly baby.
I am humbled to know that the Lord’s hand was outstretched to a struggling mother on a little rocking chair that day (and every day since.) Although my trials have not ceased, I know that whatever I face, I do not walk alone.