“When Will I Stop Feeling Guilt and Shame?,” For the Strength of youth, Mar. 2024.
Strength to Overcome Sin
When Will I Stop Feeling Guilt and Shame?
Sometimes it may seem easier to feel hopeless about yourself than to feel the love the Savior has for you—but as Nephi knew, it doesn’t have to be that way.
When you do something wrong, you might have thoughts cross your mind that you’re a failure. That you should have known better. That you’re not worth loving.
Deep down, you know that none of those things are true. You’ve learned about your worth as a son or daughter of God, and you know that repentance is real and possible. But still, after you’ve sinned or made a mistake, you might be tempted to punish yourself more than anyone else would with thoughts of guilt and shame.
Even some of our favorite scripture characters felt this way at times.
Even Nephi?
After writing about his father’s passing, Nephi wrote, “Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins” (2 Nephi 4:17–19).
This is Nephi we’re talking about—the same person who rescued the brass plates from Laban, made a bow from scratch in the wilderness, and built a ship without ever having built one before. He had a testimony of the Lord’s goodness; even so, he felt inadequate because of his sins and weaknesses.
So what are we to do? If our Book of Mormon hero struggled with feelings of guilt and inadequacy, what can we do when we feel the same way?
The Key Is to Focus on Jesus Christ
Nephi’s story didn’t end there. The key for Nephi was to shift his focus from himself to Jesus Christ.
As Nephi is lamenting, he says, “Nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted. My God hath been my support” (2 Nephi 4:19–20).
After this shift in mindset, our scripture hero is no longer focused on the anguish he feels from his mistakes. Instead, he rejoices in his Savior! Nephi says, “Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation” (2 Nephi 4:30).
Like Nephi, you can find mercy, forgiveness, and peace through Jesus Christ. You may not feel like you can give yourself grace, but there is One who will. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said, “The grace of Christ offers us not only salvation from sorrow and sin and death but also salvation from our own persistent self-criticism.”1
So when you feel so low that you don’t see a way to overcome your sins and mistakes, know that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ have never stopped loving you. Put your focus on your Savior, and He can help you overcome both your sins and your guilt.