Our Shared Struggle to Feel Like We Belong

Have you ever walked into a room and felt everyone’s eyes shift in your direction? Or worse—felt like no one noticed you at all? I have. Those situations can be hurtful because within all of us is a yearning to belong.

The gospel of Jesus Christ brings us together. But sometimes our differing circumstances can make it hard to feel like we belong. Among the many individuals who make up the Church, there are new converts who might be trying to find their way. On page 44, I share how my perspective on belonging and fulfilling the Lord’s expectations of us changed.

There are also many like Jodi and her husband, whose struggles with infertility or other trials can make them feel like they don’t belong. Read her story on page 46.

In digital-only articles, Rachelle shares how welcoming members made all the difference when she came back to church. Eric teaches that we’re all needed in the body of Christ, and Aspen shares how to belong and thrive at church as a more introverted person.

The Church is full of people who don’t feel like they belong. You might be one of them. But we all can do our part to make every member feel welcome. Because belonging isn’t a matter of circumstance—it’s a matter of who you truly are and who you are striving to become like. As children of God, we all belong in Christ’s Church.

Sincerely,

Brian S. King

Advice …

From young adults on belonging

“It’s OK to feel like you don’t belong at times, but remember that we are all unique and that’s why we fit.”

—Estefany Sofia Correa Unas, Alberta, Canada

“Remember that the real purpose for going to church is to follow Christ.”

—Paula Sáenz, Buenos Aires, Argentina

“Because I grew up with brothers who are the very definition of different (both are nonverbal autistic), I can relate to those who are decidedly unique and be friends with those who might be overlooked. Everyone can learn something from everyone else, no matter who you are or what stage of life you are in. You have something to contribute, and God loves you just as much as He does everybody else, which is a whole lot.”

—Stephanie E. Jensen, Washington, USA

“Being a convert to the Church has made me appreciate the little things with friends. I have in return become that friend for an investigator to invite, support, and enjoy the company of someone new. You may just be the support they needed. For me, they helped me hold onto choosing the right path.

“So be that friend. You don’t know; they may just be the friend you needed.”

—Hikairoa Mohi, Waikato, New Zealand

From Church leaders

““I don’t believe I’ve ever met anybody who didn’t want to belong to something that made them feel worthwhile, that made them feel that they had value.

“When people wonder, ‘Is there a place for me?’ it may be any number of things behind that. And now they ask themselves, ‘Do I fit? Do I belong here? Do they really need me?’ And I want to say emphatically, ‘Yes.’

“I think of the metaphor of Paul, which I love very much, about the Church is the body of Christ. And he says we’re baptized into that body, and he says it’s one body. Many members, but one body. …

“When a person feels isolated, I don’t deny the reality of the feeling and why it’s so natural to feel that way. But each of us, whenever that sense may come upon us, need to stop and think, ‘Jesus Christ died for me. Jesus Christ thought me worthy of His blood. And He loves me, He has hopes for me, and He can make a difference in my life. His grace can transform me. And maybe this person sitting next to me, ignoring me or even wanting to move away, maybe he or she doesn’t. But that doesn’t change the reality of what Christ feels toward me and the possibilities I have in Christ.’”

Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “Is There a Place for Me?” (Unity in Diversity video series), ChurchofJesusChrist.org.