Understanding Stress

Developing Resilience under Stress

New experiences (like joining the Church or attending a new school) are exciting. But they can also make you feel nervous. You don’t know quite what to expect. Over time you will learn to meet these challenges, and you will grow in the process. Adapting to stress in positive ways develops emotional resilience.

Service missions are no different. Sometimes a service mission feels like a wonderful spiritual adventure. It seems like a challenge you can handle. You calmly move forward with faith. You realize that much of the nervousness or worry you experience is temporary. You take courage in knowing you will adjust with time. You grow spiritually and have the opportunity to develop new skills. Experiences you once feared often become more manageable. You even come to love aspects of missionary service that once felt overwhelming. You rely on the Spirit. You grow in confidence and find joy in your service.

At other times, however, you may face unexpected problems. Some experiences are more difficult or unpleasant than you anticipated. You might wonder how you can succeed. Instead of feeling motivated to try, you might become anxious, irritable, exhausted, or frustrated. You might have physical symptoms like pain, upset stomach, sleeplessness, or illness. You might have trouble learning or connecting with people. You might feel discouraged or want to quit.

Four Levels of Stress

The symptoms of stress are like gauges on a car’s dashboard. They remind you to slow down, get fuel, or check the engine. They remind you to fill up your spiritual “tank” and look for new solutions. According to the following chart, when missionaries are coping well with stress, they are at the “green” level. When they become anxious or have trouble, they are at the “yellow” level. If they continue to feel stress, they are at the “orange” level. And when they feel unable to function because of stress, they are at the “red” level.

Over the course of your mission, you may experience different levels of stress at different times. You may feel “orange” today and get back to “green” tomorrow. This booklet has suggestions and tools that may help you stay at—or get back to—the green level.

		Signs You Are at This Level	What to Do
Green		Signs You Are at This Level Confident, happy Ready to meet challenges Recovering quickly from setbacks Getting along with your leaders Feeling the Spirit	What to Do This is the ideal. At this level, you are handling the everyday stresses of missionary service. You are learning and progressing. Continue to work hard and trust in the Lord.
Yellow		Signs You Are at This Level Tense, worried, insecure, anxious, unprepared, unable to sleep well Having trouble getting along with others Having difficulty feeling the Spirit	What to Do It is normal to spend some time at the yellow level. Be kind to yourself as you cope with challenges. Be patient as you learn new skills, such as mindfulness. These skills will help you become stronger and increase your ability to serve. Continue to pray and serve with faith. Look to the scriptures and conference talks, your service mission leaders, and this booklet for help.
Orange		Signs You Are at This Level Exhausted (physically and emotionally) Ill (upset stomach or other symptoms) Easily angered Deeply discouraged Unable to feel the Spirit	What to Do No one enjoys being at an orange level of stress, but this is not a permanent condition. Pray for guidance as you study scriptures and apply the suggestions in this booklet. Contact your service mission leaders if you stay at the orange level for over three days. They will help you.
Red		Signs You Are at This Level Feeling persistent and intense depression, panic, or anxiety Feeling hopeless Having trouble eating or sleeping (can lead to illness) Feeling overwhelmed and unable to continue Feeling as though you have been abandoned by God	What to Do If you are at this level, contact your service mission leaders, family members, or stake president for help. Ask for a priesthood blessing. Take some time to write in your journal or ponder the suggestions in this book. Pray about them. You might request a break from the things you find most difficult about your assignment. Speak with your service mission leaders to help find the right service changes for you.

You can become a useful servant of the Lord no matter what your challenges are. Try to use the ideas in this booklet and move forward with faith. Consider the experience of Sister Xochilt Oteo, who served in the San Diego Service Mission:

“When I began serving at Catholic Charities, I was excited but apprehensive. We were asked to teach a preliteracy class to immigrants and refugees. I felt I was in no way capable of teaching an English class to people from all over the world.

“We didn’t have translators in our class, so communication was limited. Sister Pennock and I spoke through pictures and hand gestures. In my first class, I was terrified! I didn’t have any idea what to do. But when I gathered my class, a surge of calm rushed through me.

“I felt the Spirit of the Lord. My job was simple—serve each student, who had left everything behind to come to the United States, and help them learn how to write their name and general information and have a basic conversation in English.

“We kept going. Months later, we were in the San Diego Temple as part of our assignment, when we overheard sisters talking about refugees coming to the baptistry that day. To my utter joy, one of those coming to the baptistry was one of our former students. We didn’t even know she had joined the Church.

“Our hearts were full and our eyes were wet as Sister Pennock and I knew we had done our part as service missionaries in blessing the lives of our students.”

Demands of Missionary Service

Serving “with all your heart, might, mind and strength” (Doctrine and Covenants 4:2) is an invitation from the Lord to bless your life. But missionary work is not easy. The demands of missionary service fall into several categories:

General (see “1. Developing Resilience under Stress”). During your missionary service, you may experience many changes and transitions. Your familiar ways of coping may not work as well on your mission. At times you may feel awkward and you may struggle. You may wonder how to help other service missionaries who struggle.

Physical (see “2. Developing Physical Resilience”). You may be on your feet much of the day. Your work may be physically tiring. Just the newness of the situation can be fatiguing.

Emotional (see “3. Developing Emotional Resilience”). You may feel anxious about all you have to learn or do. You may have trouble unwinding. You may become discouraged, get bored, or feel lonely.

Social (see “4. Developing Social Resilience”). You may need to get to know new people quickly. You may talk to strangers and interact with new leaders at your place of service.

Learning and Work (see “5. Developing Mental Resilience”). You may need to learn new skills to complete your assignments. You will need to plan and manage goals. You must also adapt to changes and solve all kinds of practical problems.

Spiritual (see “6. Developing Spiritual Resilience”). You will stretch to strengthen your testimony and avoid temptation. Strive to feel and recognize the Spirit. At times, you will need to take correction, repent, and face your weaknesses and regrets. Be humble, and rely on the Lord more than ever before. As you do these things, you will grow and progress.

“We need not be dismayed if our earnest efforts toward perfection now seem so arduous and endless. Perfection is pending.”

President Russell M. Nelson (“Perfection Pending,” Ensign, Nov. 1995, 86)

Meeting the Challenges of Your Service Mission

Many of the challenges of a service mission cannot be reduced. You will need to learn new things. You must obey the rules and get along with other people. You must do assigned work competently and leave your comfort zone to try new things.

However, you will have many resources that will help you meet the challenges of your new service role. This booklet will help you find and use these resources. Also, remember the importance of prayer, scripture study, the guidance of the Holy Ghost, and helping others. The most important thing you can do is rely on the Savior and His Atonement. He is the ultimate source for dealing with the stresses of service missionary life.

What Should I Do Next?

Study and apply the information in the next section “Using the Challenge Log.” As you do, you will be guided to sections in this booklet. These sections can help with your specific concerns. Read those sections now. Come back to other sections if you need them.