“Marriage,” Topics and Questions (2023)
Gospel Study Guide
Marriage
The potential for wife and husband to be united for eternity
Many people look forward to marriage with great joy and anticipation. There is something uniquely beautiful and hopeful about marriage. Those who are engaged to be married are excited to begin a new life with the person they love more than any other.
After we marry, we have to work to keep that marriage healthy and strong. It takes work, patience, humility, forgiveness, and dedication that lasts long after the wedding day to build a happy, enduring marriage. But the effort is well worth the reward. Through sacred ordinances and covenants made in the house of the Lord, a marriage relationship can last for eternity. A temple marriage is also called a celestial marriage. President Russell M. Nelson has taught that “celestial marriage brings greater possibilities for happiness than does any other relationship.”
Section 1
Marriage Is Central to God’s Plan of Happiness
We are part of God’s eternal family, and before coming to earth we lived in heaven with our Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother. There, we were taught about a plan that would allow us to learn and grow. As part of that plan, we came to earth in families; these families can help us progress and become more like God.
Marriage is central to God’s plan for His children. The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that marriage is “an institution of heaven first solemnized in the garden of Eden by God himself, by the authority of the everlasting priesthood.” When our families are sealed for eternity through that same priesthood power in the house of the Lord, we follow the eternal, God-given pattern that was established in the premortal life.
One of the reasons God established marriage is so we can better learn from and care for each other. Strong marriages lead to stronger families, which help us fulfill our eternal purpose. Stronger families can also lead to stronger communities here on earth. Marriages founded on the principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ can help us grow and experience some of our greatest joys in this life. They can also help prepare us for eternal life with our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.
Things to think about
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Elder Ulisses Soares said: “There is no superiority or inferiority in the marriage relationship, and neither [spouse] walks ahead of or behind the other. They walk side by side, as equals, the divine offspring of God. They become one in thought, desire, and purpose with our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. … [Such couples] walk together with respect, gratitude, and love, forgetting about themselves and seeking each other’s well-being on their journey to eternity.” Think about your own “journey to eternity” as part of God’s plan. How would walking “side by side, as equals” with a spouse help you on that journey? If you are married, what can you do to show greater respect, gratitude, and love as you make this journey with your spouse? You might also plan something specific you will do for your spouse. Record your impressions, and then act on them.
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Elder D. Todd Christofferson spoke of those for whom marriage and some of its associated blessings are not a current reality:
“Some of you are denied the blessing of marriage for reasons including a lack of viable prospects, same-sex attraction, physical or mental impairments, or simply a fear of failure that, for the moment at least, overshadows faith. Or you may have married, but that marriage ended, and you are left to manage alone what two together can barely sustain. Some of you who are married cannot bear children despite overwhelming desires and pleading prayers.
“… With confidence we testify that the Atonement of Jesus Christ has anticipated and, in the end, will compensate all deprivation and loss for those who turn to Him. No one is predestined to receive less than all that the Father has for His children.”
What do you find in Elder Christofferson’s words that might help you or someone you know who has not received the blessings of marriage or who is not experiencing those blessings right now? How does God bless “those who turn to Him” in their time of “deprivation and loss”?
Activity for learning with others
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Read Doctrine and Covenants 121:36–42 with your spouse or others, and discuss how this passage relates to marriage. President Gordon B. Hinckley counseled: “I am satisfied that if we would look for the virtues in one another and not the vices, there would be much more of happiness in the homes of our people. There would be far less of divorce, much less of infidelity, much less of anger and rancor and quarreling. There would be more of forgiveness, more of love, more of peace, more of happiness. This is as the Lord would have it.” Discuss how remembering that marriage is a central part of the plan of happiness can help us follow President Hinckley’s counsel. Then you could share ideas for finding more happiness in marriage.
Learn more
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Genesis 1:27–28; 2:18, 21–24; 1 Corinthians 11:11–12; Doctrine and Covenants 42:22; 49:15–17
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“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Gospel Library
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Gordon B. Hinckley, “Living Worthy of the Girl You Will Someday Marry,” Ensign, May 1998, 49–51
Section 2
Because of Temple Ordinances and Covenants, Marriage Can Be Eternal
In 1843 the Prophet Joseph Smith dictated the revelation now recorded in Doctrine and Covenants 132, which included the doctrine of eternal marriage. This doctrine is that marriage, if sealed by priesthood authority and the Holy Spirit of Promise, is valid both on earth and in the eternities. Eternal marriage is also called celestial marriage or “the new and everlasting covenant of marriage” (Doctrine and Covenants 131:2). It is made possible through a priesthood ordinance called a temple sealing. This sacred ceremony takes place in the house of the Lord.
Eternal marriage creates a covenant relationship between a husband and wife and the Lord. The covenant of eternal marriage is necessary for exaltation (see Doctrine and Covenants 131:1–4). If we are faithful to this covenant, our marriage and family relationships can last forever.
Things to think about
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Read Doctrine and Covenants 132:19–20, and ponder what these verses teach about the marriage covenant. Sister Julie B. Beck taught: “A man and a woman who enter into the full partnership of a covenant temple marriage share equally in the blessings of that covenant if they are faithful [see Doctrine and Covenants 131:1–2]. The Lord has said that their covenant will be in force after this life, and together they are promised power and exaltation [see Doctrine and Covenants 132:19–20].” How could the promised blessings of a covenant marriage help a married couple stay committed to each other when things are difficult?
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God wants us to have not just any marriage but an eternal, covenant marriage. Elder Bruce C. Hafen taught: “When troubles come to a covenant marriage, the husband and wife work them through. They marry to give and to grow, bound by covenants to each other, to the community, and to God.” President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, while serving in the First Presidency, said, “Great marriages are built brick by brick, day after day, over a lifetime.” Look at the accompanying image of a brick home, and think about the “bricks” that would make up a strong marriage. You could read President Uchtdorf’s conference message “In Praise of Those Who Save” and reflect on the counsel he gives to husbands and wives. What “bricks” might you lay over the next several weeks to strengthen your marriage or to prepare for a strong marriage?
Activities for learning with others
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Our efforts to strengthen our marriage have far-reaching effects. Our marriage affects not only us and our spouse but also our children and their children, throughout eternity. In his message “Fruit That Remains,” Elder Matthew L. Carpenter spoke of the importance of preserving the “fruit” of our marriage covenant and compared it to carefully preserving fruit in bottles. He taught, “If we make and keep covenants with God, the blessings associated with our covenants can extend beyond this life and be sealed upon us, or preserved, forever, becoming fruit that remains for all eternity.” You might consider reading or listening to this message while enjoying some preserved fruit together. Talk about how to nurture a marriage to produce “fruit that remains” beyond this life and throughout eternity.
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Most married couples have difficulties from time to time, and sometimes an eternal marriage may seem out of reach. But President Hinckley counseled: “The cure for most marital troubles does not lie in divorce. It lies in repentance and forgiveness, in expressions of kindness and concern. It is to be found in application of the Golden Rule.” If you are experiencing challenges in your marriage, talk together about how remembering your covenants might help you make changes you would like to see. Choose something that has been a difficulty in your marriage, and work together to resolve it (the Church’s Strengthening Marriage guide has many ideas that could help). Seek help from a trusted individual (such as a Church leader, therapist, or marriage counselor) if needed.
Learn more
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Russell M. Nelson, “Celestial Marriage,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2008, 92–94
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Marcus B. Nash, “The New and Everlasting Covenant,” Ensign, Dec. 2015, 40–47