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James 3


James 3

The Words We Speak

Three teenage young women smiling and laughing together.

The words we speak have power. Can you think of experiences in your life where you have felt the power of words, either for good or for bad? In his epistle, James taught the importance of controlling our speech. This lesson is intended to help you evaluate the words you speak and how your words are impacting your efforts to become more like the Savior.

The power of words

Look at the pictures below and imagine the conversation that the individuals might be having. Think about the impact that the words we hear and use can have.

A mother argues with her teenage son while they stand in their kitchen.
A young woman and her mother using a tablet and scriptures probably study and having a conversation.
  • What is the last thing you can remember someone saying to you that either helped or hurt you?

  • What is the last thing you said to someone that strengthened or encouraged them?

Consider if you have said anything recently that may have had a negative effect on someone. As you study the teachings of James, look for truths that can help you better understand the power of words. Pay attention to feelings, thoughts, and impressions that motivate you to speak more like the Savior.

The tongue is like …

James emphasized the power of the words we hear and speak and compared the tongue to many different things. Read James 3:2–12, looking for what James compared it to. Draw a simple version of one or two of James’s comparisons in your study journal, pondering how our words can be like what you are drawing.

Read the following list to see if you identified the same comparisons.

Writing on a piece of paper with a pen or pencil. 1. Answer the following questions in your study journal:

  • How can these comparisons help us better understand the power of the words we hear and speak?

  • What other comparisons might you add to describe the impact of the words we speak?

Referring to James’s powerful teachings, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles shared the following:

Official Portrait of Elder Jeffrey R. Holland. Photographed January 2018.

Obviously James doesn’t mean our tongues are always iniquitous, nor that everything we say is “full of deadly poison.” But he clearly means that at least some things we say can be destructive, even venomous—and that is a chilling indictment for a Latter-day Saint! The voice that bears profound testimony, utters fervent prayer, and sings the hymns of Zion can be the same voice that berates and criticizes, embarrasses and demeans, inflicts pain and destroys the spirit of oneself and of others in the process. …

… May we try to be “perfect” men and women in at least this one way now—by offending not in word, or more positively put, by speaking with a new tongue, the tongue of angels. Our words, like our deeds, should be filled with faith and hope and charity, … so desperately needed in the world today. With such words, spoken under the influence of the Spirit, tears can be dried, hearts can be healed, lives can be elevated, hope can return, confidence can prevail.

(Jeffrey R. Holland, “The Tongue of Angels,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2007, 16, 18)

  • What did you learn from James’s comparisons and Elder Holland’s statement?

One truth we can learn is that followers of God strive to use their language for righteous purposes, not to spread evil.

Reflect for a moment on how you have seen language used for both good and evil in the following situations:

  • in texting or social media

  • at church on Sundays

  • at school with your friends

  • on a team or in a club

  • at home with your family

  • What experiences have you had that illustrate the powerful effect words can have on people, for good or for evil?

Jesus Christ was “a perfect man” ( James 3:2) and our example in all things, including the words He spoke. Remembering what you know about Him, imagine how the Savior might use His words if He were in the situations listed previously.

Writing on a piece of paper with a pen or pencil. 2. Answer the following question in your study journal:

  • What differences might you notice between how you imagine the Savior would use words and what you commonly see and hear in these settings today?

The language we hear and use

Through His prophets, the Lord has taught us what we should and should not say.

Ponder your communication (in any form: texting, social media, speaking with others, and so on) as you read the following 10 statements adapted from For the Strength of Youth ([booklet, 2011], 20–21). Evaluate your language using a scale from 1 to 5, with 1 meaning “I need a lot of help” and 5 meaning “I’m doing really well.”

  1. I try to use clean and intelligent language.

  2. I use uplifting, encouraging, and complimentary language.

  3. I speak kindly and positively about others.

  4. I do not insult others or put them down, even in joking.

  5. I strive to avoid gossip of any kind and avoid speaking in anger.

  6. When tempted to say harsh or hurtful things, I leave them unsaid.

  7. I use the names of God and Jesus Christ with reverence and respect.

  8. I address Father in Heaven using reverent and respectful language.

  9. I do not use profane, vulgar, or crude language or gestures.

  10. I do not tell jokes or stories about immoral actions.

Think about the language you choose to use, and ponder what you could do better.

Writing on a piece of paper with a pen or pencil. 3. Answer the following questions in your study journal:

  • What are one or two things that could help you more carefully choose the words you speak and hear?

  • In what situations do you especially want to improve?

  • What strategies might help?

  • How might your efforts help you become more like the Savior?

Optional: Want to Learn More?

How do our words reflect who we are as individuals?

Elder Robert S. Wood of the Seventy taught the following:

Final official portrait of Elder Robert S. Wood of the Second Quorum of the Seventy, 1999. Called as president of the Boston Massachusetts Temple, 2009. Released from Second Quorum of the Seventy October 3, 2009 at general conference.

Our words and external expressions are not neutral, for they reflect both who we are and shape who we are becoming. …

What we say and how we present ourselves not only betray our inner person but also mold that person, those around us, and finally our whole society. Every day each of us is implicated in obscuring the light or in chasing away the darkness. We have been called to invite the light and to be a light, to sanctify ourselves and edify others. …

When we speak and act, we should ask whether our words and expressions are calculated to invite the powers of heaven into our lives and to invite all to come unto Christ. We must treat sacred things with reverence. We need to eliminate from our conversations the immodest and the lewd, the violent and the threatening, the demeaning and the false. As the Apostle Peter wrote, “But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation” [1 Peter 1:15]. The expression conversation refers here not only to speech but also to our entire comportment.

(Robert S. Wood, “The Tongue of Angels,” Ensign, Nov. 1999, 83–84)

How can we positively change the language we use and hear?

The video “No Cussing Club” (4:56), available on ChurchofJesusChrist.org, shows one young man’s efforts to help others avoid bad language.

4:56