“Lesson 23 Class Preparation Material: When Blessings of Eternal Marriage or Children Are Delayed,” The Eternal Family Teacher Material (2022)
“Lesson 23 Class Preparation Material,” The Eternal Family Teacher Material
Lesson 23 Class Preparation Material
When Blessings of Eternal Marriage or Children Are Delayed
Many people experience delays in receiving their righteous desires for marriage or children, and these delays can bring discouragement, worry, or heartache. As you study this material, think about why we can trust that the Lord will fulfill His promised blessings for our eternal families if we are faithful to Him. Also consider why we are all needed in the Savior’s Church and in God’s plan, whatever our family circumstances are.
Section 1
What if my circumstances don’t match those described in the family proclamation?
Church leaders teach ideals of family life. They also recognize that not everyone experiences these ideals. For example, in the family proclamation, prophets teach that some “circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation” in fulfilling sacred family responsibilities (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” ChurchofJesusChrist.org).
Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles acknowledged that faithful Church members experience a variety of family circumstances:
There are so many, young and old, who are loyal and true to the gospel of Jesus Christ, even though their own current experience does not fit neatly inside the family proclamation: children whose lives have been shaken by divorce; … divorced women and men who have been gravely wounded by the unfaithfulness of a spouse; husbands and wives who are unable to have children; … single women and men who, for various reasons, have been unable to marry. (“The Eye of Faith,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2019, 36)
President M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught:
More than half of adults in the Church today are widowed, divorced, or not yet married. Some wonder about their opportunities and place in God’s plan and in the Church. We should understand that eternal life is not simply a question of current marital status but of discipleship and being “valiant in the testimony of Jesus” [Doctrine and Covenants 76:79; see also Doctrine and Covenants 121:29]. …
… All those who accept the Savior’s gracious gift of repentance and live His commandments will receive eternal life, even though they do not attain to all its characteristics and perfections in mortality. (“Hope in Christ,” Liahona, May 2021, 55)
Some people might wonder why Church leaders continue to teach about ideals of family life when many Church members do not experience these ideals.
Sister Sharon Eubank of the Relief Society General Presidency shared some of her experience and insight as a single adult:
Being single myself, I get how this feels. You have no wingman; sitting at church is awkward; parties can be torture; relatives feel they can comment when no one should be saying a word. …
Fitting into a Church focused on family can also be challenging. But the reality is that a majority of Church members do not live in perfect family situations. I’m not sure anyone lives in that perfect, ideal family. So why keep the emphasis? Because family is our destiny, and we are on this earth to learn the skills of strong family relationships, no matter what our own situation is. (“A Letter to a Single Sister,” Ensign, Oct. 2019, 40)
Ponder in Preparation for Class
In what ways can we exercise faith in Jesus Christ and His teachings on the family even when our family circumstances are not ideal?
Section 2
How can I move forward in faith when desired blessings are delayed?
Abraham and Sarah knew what it was like to have some desired blessings be delayed and others go unfulfilled in this life. When Abraham was 75 years old, he and Sarah had no children (see Genesis 11:29–30; 12:4). Yet the Lord promised him, “I will make thy seed as the dust of the earth” (Genesis 13:16). The Lord also promised that Abraham and his posterity would be given the land of Canaan as an inheritance (see Genesis 17:8). Later, when Abraham was 100 years old and Sarah was 90, they were promised that Sarah would bear a son to be named Isaac (see Genesis 17:17, 19). Though this promise and some other promises to them were fulfilled, the Lord’s promises that they would have innumerable posterity and receive the promised land were not fulfilled in Abraham’s and Sarah’s lifetimes.
In the book of Hebrews, the Apostle Paul referenced these promises to Abraham and Sarah.
Study in Preparation for Class
Read Hebrews 11:8, 11–13, and consider what you can learn from Abraham and Sarah’s example about exercising faith in Jesus Christ when desired blessings are delayed or unfulfilled in this life.
President Dallin H. Oaks of the First Presidency explained, “Faith means trust—trust in God’s will, trust in His way of doing things, and trust in His timetable” (“Timing,” Ensign, Oct. 2003, 12).
Waiting upon the Lord for blessings we desire can test our patience and obedience. While serving as a member of the Seventy, Elder Spencer J. Condie shared:
Sometimes, in our earthly impatience, we may lose sight of the Lord’s precious promises and disconnect our obedience from the fulfillment of these promises. (“Claim the Exceeding Great and Precious Promises,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2007, 17)
President Ballard similarly taught the following about waiting upon the Lord:
Waiting upon the Lord implies continued obedience and spiritual progress toward Him. Waiting upon the Lord does not imply biding one’s time. You should never feel like you are in a waiting room. …
The personal growth one can achieve now while waiting upon the Lord and His promises is an invaluable, sacred element of His plan for each one of us. … The Lord honors those who serve and wait upon Him in patience and faith [see Isaiah 64:4; Doctrine and Covenants 133:45]. (“Hope in Christ,” 55)
Record Your Thoughts
Record experiences or teachings that have shaped your confidence that the Lord will fulfill His promises even if blessings are delayed.
Section 3
How can I contribute in the Lord’s Church regardless of my family circumstances?
Some Church members whose family circumstances don’t currently match those described in the family proclamation may wonder how they fit in the Church. The Apostle Paul compared the Church of Jesus Christ to the physical body to teach us why each Church member is needed.
Study in Preparation for Class
Read 1 Corinthians 12:12, 16–17, 21, 25–27, and think about how every member of the Church is vital and contributes to the whole.
Our unique circumstances can bring value and experience to our ward or branch families. President Ballard emphasized:
Never forget that you are a child of God, our Eternal Father, now and forever. He loves you, and the Church wants and needs you. Yes, we need you! We need your voices, talents, skills, goodness, and righteousness. (“Hope in Christ,” 55)
Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles also taught:
Any one of us could isolate ourselves from this ward family on the basis of our differences. … Instead, let us share our gifts and talents with others, bringing brightness of hope and joy to them, and in so doing lift our own spirits. (“Belonging to a Ward Family,” Ensign, Mar. 1996, 16)
Ponder in Preparation for Class
What can I do to better understand other members of my ward or branch and help them to feel valued and included? If I feel like I don’t belong in the Church, what can I do to allow the Savior to help me feel my value and place in His Church?