Though I grew up in the gospel, it has taken a long time for me to learn some basic doctrines and principles “line upon line, precept upon precept” (2 Nephi 28:30). In 2012, I happened upon an address by Elder David A. Bednar given in 2001. In this address, titled “In the Strength of the Lord,” he talked about the redeeming power that comes to us from Jesus Christ because of His Atonement. But he also opened my eyes to an additional blessing I had never before considered: Christ’s strengthening and enabling power.
The word grace refers to this strengthening and enabling power. The Bible Dictionary teaches us, “It is … through the grace of the Lord that individuals, through faith in the Atonement of Jesus Christ and repentance of their sins, receive strength and assistance … that they otherwise would not be able to maintain if left to their own means” (Bible Dictionary, “Grace”). And Elder Bednar taught that this power “strengthens us to do and be good and serve [and endure] beyond our own individual desire and natural capacity.”1
When I came to understand this doctrine that year, I was so excited and inspired. Since I was serving as bishop at the time, I assumed that I had learned this principle in order to bless the members of my ward. I believed that Heavenly Father would guide me in teaching them this principle so that they could better access Christ’s strengthening and enabling power in their lives and families.
But later that year, I unknowingly began a personal journey during which I had the privilege of applying and using this power myself.
In November 2012, I was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. The following months brought surgery, chemotherapy treatments, and a few other complications. As I suffered and struggled, I relied on what my Heavenly Father had just taught me. I tried to keep my prayers focused on this plea: “Please bless me, Heavenly Father. I need the strengthening and enabling power of my Savior, and I need it right now.” My pain wasn’t ever taken away at these times, but I had a strong sense that my burdens were eased and made lighter, as Alma and his people experienced (see Mosiah 24).
As I look back, I recognize my Heavenly Father’s miraculous hand. That year, He guided me to and tutored me about the Atonement of Jesus Christ—not just for my ward but for me. He knew that within months I would go through the most difficult adversity of my life and that I could not endure if left to my own means, with only my natural capacity. He lovingly prepared me and provided me with a life-changing perspective just before I would desperately need it. What a blessing!
I love my Heavenly Father and trust Him implicitly. This experience has significantly improved my relationship with Him. My prayers and my thoughts of Him are totally different today—not because I know more about prayer but because my trust in Him and relationship with Him have deepened.
I began having abdominal pain on October 28, 2012, which turned out to be the last Sunday I served as bishop. I had surgery on November 16, 2012, and I was released as bishop in January 2013 after serving for about two and a half years. I continue to long for this special season of service and grieve its loss. But I have come to understand that while my plan was to serve for five years, God’s plan was for me to serve for two and a half. This is part of what I’ve learned in such a sweet way—to submit to His plan. “We don’t know what the Lord is trying to teach us, but if I really trust Heavenly Father, it really doesn’t matter what I don’t understand. I know that God has a plan for me that usually is totally different than the plan that I have for myself. It’s not always easier, but it’s always better.”2
Notes
1. David A. Bednar, “In the Strength of the Lord” (Brigham Young University devotional, Oct. 23, 2001), 3, speeches.byu.edu.
2. “Courage” (video), ChurchofJesusChrist.org.