Digital Only: Young Adults
How Setbacks in My Education Changed the Way I See Change
How I went from feeling behind to feeling content in my educational journey.
There I was, staring at another article with multiple comments and suggestions. Most were valid and helpful, but I still felt down. Since I’m a writer, my work is constantly changing. Usually I’m OK with it, but this time I found myself frustrated.
Did everything always have to change?
My articles weren’t the only thing changing. My plans for graduating university in a timely manner were changing too. After serving a mission, switching majors and COVID-19 had set my education back. While my friends were all graduating, I was halfway through school. Generally, I felt behind. Things had changed so much from the way I’d expected them to go.
During this time, I became a communication intern with BYU–Pathway Worldwide.
Through work, I spoke with students around the world who were single parents, returning to school after years away, or struggling financially. Some had experienced way more unexpected changes than I had, and they were thriving.
But how?
As I came to know two specific students, Darlyn and Alexander, I took note of the lessons they taught me.
Change Is Inevitable
When I held an online interview with Darlyn and she turned on her camera, she gave me the biggest smile. It was morning in Singapore, and she had gotten up early to meet with me before getting her three kids to school and herself to work.
Darlyn had always wanted to get a master’s degree, but at 36, she was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer. This upset her plans for further education and her plans for life.
As I listened to her story, I thought that if anyone had a right to be upset with difficult changes, it was Darlyn. But she pointed out the blessings and mercies she’d received and the people who had served her. Darlyn accepted the change of plans with grace. Instead of focusing on what she had lost, she focused on the experiences she had gained. Just as President Russell M. Nelson taught, “The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.”1
Ultimately, Darlyn joined BYU–Pathway Worldwide because she wanted to keep her mind healthy. She told me she didn’t hate having cancer—she was grateful it led her to BYU–Pathway and to deepen her relationship with Jesus Christ.
I left that conversation wanting to change my perspective of change. Because Darlyn had put aside resentment and anger about her circumstances, she was able to take control of her life. Instead of challenges and change deterring her progress, they propelled her forward.
Heavenly Father Never Changes
Alexander was sitting in his car in American Samoa when we talked over the phone. I was astonished as he told me about how he gave up his full-ride football scholarship to serve a mission. After returning home, he felt guided to help with his family’s business and marry his sweetheart in the temple. Only then did he feel prompted to finish his education, and BYU–Pathway was the perfect solution for him.
When Alexander told me he had enrolled and withdrawn from school twice because of a hurricane and then because of a house fire, I was shocked. He had chosen to serve the Lord for two years before pursuing his education and was then faced with significant adversity—yet he persisted. When I asked him how he kept moving forward, he mentioned the story of Nephi getting the plates from Jerusalem. Even though Nephi did what God asked, it still took him and his brothers three tries to be successful. But Nephi never lost faith, because God had promised to provide a way for Him (see 1 Nephi 3–4).
Alexander taught me that everything in life is subject to change except for our loving Heavenly Father. As President Nelson also taught: “The Lord never slumbers, nor does He sleep [see Psalm 121:4]. He ‘is the same yesterday, today and [tomorrow]’ [Mormon 9:9]. He will not forsake His covenants, His promises, or His love for His people.”2
I truly know now that no matter what changes I face, His commandments, blessings, and love are unwavering and eternal. Alexander taught me that if I set my path toward God and Jesus Christ and rely on Them, I will be able to face the uncertain future with hope and faith.
Finding Peace on My Own Journey
Thanks to these friends and my time at BYU–Pathway, I see change in a new light! Looking back, if my personal plan for education hadn’t been altered, I never would have found a major I love or met the wonderful people in my life. I know now that as long as I trust Heavenly Father and focus my life on Jesus Christ, I’ll be able to conquer whatever change comes my way.