Lesson 12 Teacher Material

Nurturing the Marriage Relationship

The Lord wants to help us build joyful, eternal marriages. Using prophetic counsel and the teachings and example of Jesus Christ, students will discover ways they can nurture their current or future marriage. Students will also be invited to determine ways to faithfully cleave to their spouse.

Suggestions for Teaching

We can nurture our marriage by living the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Improving Our Teaching and Learning

Expect students to fulfill their role as learners. “A sense of purpose exists in a class where teachers expect students to fulfill their role as learners and assist them in doing so and where students are trusted to contribute in significant ways” (Gospel Teaching and Learning: A Handbook for Teachers and Leaders in Seminaries and Institutes of Religion [2012], 15).

Invite a student to read aloud the statement by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland in section 1 of the preparation material. Then invite a few students to share examples of couples they know who have happy marriages.

Arrange students into small groups, and designate a leader for each group. Provide each group with a copy of the following handout, read the instructions together, and then give students sufficient time to complete the activity. (If there is time, you might even invite the groups to create their blog post or video during the activity and have it ready to share with the class.)

Key Principles to Nurturing a Happy and Eternal Marriage

The Eternal Family Teacher Material—Lesson 12

Imagine your group is going to write a blog post or create a video called “Key Principles to Nurturing a Happy and Eternal Marriage.” The principles for your blog post or video should be drawn from sections 1 and 2 of the preparation material or from the scriptures. Since you can’t cover every important point in your blog post or video, decide which are the five most important ways to complete the following principle: Husbands and wives can nurture a happy and eternal marriage by …

• Example:

• Husbands and wives can nurture a happy and eternal marriage by following the Savior’s example of love and righteous sacrifice (see Ephesians 5:25, 28–31).

The following questions can help you decide which principles to include:

• Why should this principle be included in our blog post or video? In what way does living this principle contribute to a happy and lasting marriage?

• Did the happily married couples we talked with in preparation for class mention this principle? If so, what did they share about it?

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Key Principles to Nurturing a Happy and Eternal Marriage

After groups have had sufficient time to identify and record five principles, ask them to write their top three principles on the board (or to share their blog posts or videos). After the principles have been identified, invite students to share what they learned from this experience. As they share, consider asking questions similar to the following to help students take effective, righteous action.

• When have you seen this principle in action? What did you observe?

• How can the Savior’s life and example deepen your understanding of this principle?

• If you are single, what are some ways you can practice this principle to help prepare you for a happy marriage?

• If you are married, how could applying this principle to your marriage lead to greater happiness?

After time for meaningful discussion, invite students to record a specific action they will take either to prepare for a happy marriage or to better nurture their marriage.

Husbands and wives are to cleave to each other.

If possible, show the following video clip of President Russell M. Nelson sharing an experience he had observing a married couple on an airplane (show from time code 0:24 to 1:50). This clip is from the talk “Nurturing Marriage” (Ensign or Liahona, May 2006, 36).

If the video or audio recording is not available, read the following statement together:

As we Brethren travel about the world, sometimes we see worrisome scenes. On a recent flight, I sat behind a husband and wife. She obviously loved her husband. As she stroked the back of his neck I could see her wedding ring. She would nestle close to him and rest her head upon his shoulder, seeking his companionship.

In contrast, he seemed totally oblivious to her presence. He was focused solely upon an electronic game player. During the entire flight, his attention was riveted upon that device. Not once did he look at her, speak to her, or acknowledge her yearning for affection.

His inattention made me feel like shouting: “Open your eyes, man! Can’t you see? Pay attention! Your wife loves you! She needs you!”

I don’t know more about them. I haven’t seen them since. Perhaps I was alarmed unduly. And very possibly, if this man knew of my concern for them, he might feel sorry for me in not knowing how to use such an exciting toy. (“Nurturing Marriage,” 36)

• What is troubling about the husband’s behavior in this situation?

• What things can get in the way of spouses connecting to each other and nurturing their marriage?

Invite a student to read Doctrine and Covenants 42:22 aloud. Emphasize that husbands and wives are to love each other with all their heart and cleave only to each other. Consider inviting students to answer one or more of the following questions to help them deepen their understanding of this principle.

• What does it mean to cleave to your spouse and “none else”? (Doctrine and Covenants 42:22). (You may want to review the statement by President Spencer W. Kimball in section 3 of the preparation material.) Why is cleaving a powerful expression of love?

• What are different ways fidelity in marriage (faithfulness to your spouse) can be challenged? How can spouses protect themselves against any form of infidelity in marriage? (Consider inviting students to review the statements by Elder L. Whitney Clayton and President Nelson in section 3 of the preparation material.)

• How can a married couple balance and create space for their personal interests while properly nurturing and maintaining complete devotion to their marriage?

Give students time to record their responses to the following question, which they were invited to ponder in section 3 of the preparation material:

• What adjustments do you need to make now to be better prepared to cleave to your future spouse or to more fully cleave to your spouse if you are married?

Conclude the lesson by testifying of the Lord’s desire and ability to support us in building joyful, eternal marriages as we put forth our best effort.

For Next Time

Invite students to prayerfully study the preparation material for the next lesson, which is about the sweet and sacred gift of sexual intimacy. Encourage students to come to class ready to talk candidly and respectfully about this gift and how to protect it.