“Do My Children Recognize the Meaning of the Sacrament?,” Liahona, June 2023, United States and Canada Section.
Do My Children Recognize the Meaning of the Sacrament?
Five ways we can help our children have a more spiritual experience with the sacrament.
Illustrations by Casey Nelson
One Sunday at church, I found myself in the hallway with my young daughter as the sacrament hymn finished. I was trying to teach her to be quiet during the passing of the bread and water. As we fought our battle of wills for yet another Sunday, I began to feel a great weight of discouragement.
Was I doing the right thing? Would she ever learn? How long had it been since I’d been able to reverently partake of the sacrament myself?
An older man shuffled out of the chapel with the tray of bread. My daughter thrashed in my arms, and I felt close to tears. As he held the bread out to me with one hand, he gently placed his other hand on top of my daughter’s head.
I looked up and the man smiled at us both. His eyes were full of compassionate understanding and love. My overtaxed mother’s heart was able to refocus on the true meaning of the sacrament. My impatience with my daughter dissolved, replaced with love for her and for my Savior. I knew my Savior wasn’t disappointed in my efforts to teach my daughter. I wasn’t failing her or Him. He loved her. He loved me.
With time, my daughter learned to sit quietly, so I’m no longer worried about her actions distracting others while they reflect on the Savior and renew their covenants. Now the deeper concern in my heart is that she learn to recognize the meaning behind the ordinance and the power of the covenants.
So how can we teach our children what it means to partake of the sacrament? Here are five ways parents can help their growing children transition their understanding of the sacrament from outward motions to the inward heart.
Set an Example
It might seem simple, but I’ve always found that my example is doing more teaching than my words ever do. More importantly, this is one thing I have control over. As much as I sometimes wish it were different, I can’t make my children choose God.
But I can choose God.
I can choose to learn about the sacrament and strengthen my own testimony of the power of the covenants associated with this ordinance. I can choose to let my children see me living the gospel, gaining strength from my covenants, and honoring my promises.
Elder Jorge M. Alvarado of the Seventy taught, “The influence we have on our children is more powerful as they see us walking faithfully on the covenant path.”1 Are we doing our part? Do we understand what it means to partake of the sacrament? Do our children know it’s important to us because of how we act and what we say?
The Burial of Christ, by Carl Heinrich Bloch
Teach the Symbolism and Scripture Stories
While our examples will do a lot, deliberate teaching will also provide our children with the knowledge they need to deepen their understanding of the sacrament. We can teach them what the bread and water represent. We can teach them the stories of Jesus, so they have something to reflect on as they partake of the sacrament.2
Like Nephi, as we teach, we “talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins” (2 Nephi 25:26).
Prayer at Gethsemane, by Del Parson
Each child learns differently. Some learn through sound, others through sight, and some though physical actions. The sacrament is a tangible reminder of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It involves all of our senses. It’s the ultimate teaching experience. Heavenly Father wants us and all our children to learn about the sacrament! We can use His example in seeking a variety of ways to teach our children about who Jesus Christ is, what He has done for them, and how the sacrament can bring them closer to Him.
Photograph by Wendy Gibbs Keeler
Encourage Their Personal Relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ
We teach our children to pray to Heavenly Father and to come to Jesus Christ because, ultimately, their learning and progression depend on their own desire to know Them and have Them in their lives. Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught, “In our daily life it is our paramount task and blessed opportunity to encounter God.”3
Are our children encountering God every day? Are they learning to “hear Him”?4 While we can’t force their relationship with their Heavenly Father or the Savior, we can create opportunities for the Spirit to be present and then draw their attention to how the Holy Ghost feels and what they are learning. We can encourage and make time for their personal prayers and scripture study.
As I navigate the preteen and teenage years with my children, I’m learning that the best thing they can have is a growing testimony of all three members of the Godhead. I know that their ability to understand and appreciate the sacrament is connected to their relationship with Them.
Detail from Suffer Little Children to Come unto Me, by Carl Heinrich Bloch
Help Them Reflect on Personal Spiritual Experiences
As our children have more spiritual experiences, they will have memories to draw on while they partake of the sacrament. An essential part of the sacrament is our promise to “always remember him” (Doctrine and Covenants 20: 77, 79).
We can encourage our children to record their spiritual experiences, share their testimonies of Christ, and recall times when they’ve been influenced by the Holy Ghost. The Spirit they feel as they partake of the sacrament can help them remember past spiritual experiences. As they recall their spiritual memories, they recall the feelings they had and the love they felt. This can give them the courage to act on new promptings they receive—perhaps even those they receive during the sacrament.
Elder Ulisses Soares of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught, “The more we remember the Lord, the more power we will have to stay on the correct path, doing what He expects of us.”5
Listen to the Promptings of the Holy Ghost
As our children deepen their personal relationship with Jesus Christ by learning the meaning of the sacrament, they will naturally begin to act on promptings they receive as they remember Him in their daily lives. Likewise, we need to be in tune with the Holy Ghost and be ready to receive His further promptings about how we can teach our children about the sacrament.
When we are discouraged or feel like our children aren’t learning as quickly as we hoped, the Spirit can direct us to what we should do next. Perhaps we will be inspired with the right words or the best actions to take with a particular child. Perhaps we will be comforted and told to keep going on the path we are on.
Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ know and love our children perfectly. They will help us teach them because They also want them to understand the meaning of the sacrament and the importance of the covenants. Our Father and our Savior are working in our children’s lives just as we are. We can trust that They clearly see the path forward for us and for our children.
My daughter’s testimony is just starting to take root. Some Sundays she is more focused on the sacrament than others. But when I remember the man from my ward all those years ago, I feel hope in her ability to learn and in the future of her faith. We all learn step by step. My desire is that one day the bread will be passed to her from the hand of a worthy priesthood holder and she will see in him the hands of her Savior.