4 Suggestions from General Conference about Turning Outward
I came into conference with my own situation in mind, but the answers I received were universal.
Photograph from Getty Images
A few weeks before general conference, my stake announced a return to weekly in-person church. At first, I was excited. But I went home after the first week of in-person meetings feeling disappointed.
Like many young adults, I was forced to move during the pandemic, and although I had met a few ward members virtually, when I went to church for the first time, most of the faces were still unfamiliar. I missed the quiet Sundays at home with my husband and our peaceful sacrament meetings for two. Going from the quiet, intimate setting of my house to an echoey chapel full of lots of noises and distractions felt like a step down for my spirituality.
So before general conference started, I prayed for help in changing my heart. That prayer was answered again and again. No matter what the speaker called it—ministering, strengthening communities, building the Lord’s kingdom—they focused on the importance of turning outward, and the Spirit impressed on me that this was what I was missing at church. Here are four things I learned that we all can apply as we try to look outside ourselves:
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Fill your interactions with kindness.
Elder Gary E. Stevenson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles spoke of the importance of kindness. He called it “a fundamental, healing gospel principle—one that can heal hearts emotionally [and] spiritually.”1 We each have different needs, but genuine kindness is universal. True kindness goes beyond being polite or fulfilling a duty—it is an expression of love. Kindness comes as we thoughtfully consider others’ needs in our efforts to turn outward.
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Make space for everyone.
We can’t forget to reach out to those on the edges. Every member “has God-given gifts and talents that can help build up His kingdom now.”2 President M. Russell Ballard, Acting President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, made that point in regard to marital status, but it can apply to race, class, and culture.
Elder Edward Dube of the Seventy shared an experience he had when he felt out of place as a new Seventy and Elder Jeffrey R. Holland reached out to him in love.3 As we follow the guidance of the Spirit, we too can discern who needs our love.
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Value others’ experiences.
Elder Jorge T. Becerra of the Seventy taught that welcoming those on the margins includes recognizing the value of their experiences. He reminded us that all are parts of the “body of Christ” (1 Corinthians 12:27). He said, “I often wonder who we are missing in our various congregations that would strengthen us and make us whole.”4
It’s tempting to try to solve the problems of those who are struggling, but that’s not always the best approach. By listening with compassion, we show our love for others. We create a welcoming environment. We also can learn valuable things by listening to those whose experiences fall outside the norm.
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Expand your vision of quorums and classes.
President Russell M. Nelson said, “Your priesthood quorum is meant for more than just a meeting.”5 Although he was addressing priesthood holders, the same holds true for Relief Society classes. Both groups can be a source of connection and spiritual strengthening when they extend beyond the classroom.
Right now, in this pandemic, there are many approaches to Priesthood and Relief Society meetings—from fully in-person to nonexistent. But President Nelson reminded me that we can uplift others without sitting next to them in a church building. We should always support others in our classes and quorums and allow them to support us.
Although I came into conference with my own situation in mind, the answers I received were universal. The speakers didn’t give advice for enduring the noises and distractions that come with large congregations or even feeling out of place in a new ward or branch. Instead, they spoke about the fundamental issue that I didn’t know I had—my need to look past my own comfort and turn outward. I’m grateful for the inspired messages of leaders that helped me in my journey. I know that as each of us looks beyond ourselves, our own joy will increase as well.