Husbands are consulted before their wives or children are called to Church positions. Should wives be asked for permission before their husbands or children are called to positions?

Boyd D. Beagley, director of pre-service training, Church Educational System. The Brethren have counseled that before a wife or a child is to receive any Church calling, the ecclesiastical leaders discuss the call with the husband and receive his consent to issue the call. Because the wife has such an important role in teaching, training, and helping the children, in addition to organizing and keeping the home in order, it is important that the husband give his support and consent when a calling is issued to his wife. Callings in the Church often require a united family effort, and it is important that full support be given by all family members. It is the father who has the responsibility to see that this occurs.

In the Church, a father has the responsibility of being the “patriarch” of his family. This means he is to be the person, in consultation with his wife, who brings order and harmony to the home. If this is not done, each family member can all too easily be pulled away from the family-centered life-style by various outside influences, causing serious damage to the unity and effectiveness of the family unit.

Paul has given counsel in Ephesians 5:22–25 [Eph. 5:22–25]: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.”

Paul’s statement is very emphatic concerning the father presiding over the family in righteousness. One of the prerequisites for presiding righteously is that the husband do his utmost to love his wife as Christ loved the Church. As this occurs, we do not find unrighteous dominion by the father.

Therefore, when a man is called to a position in the Church, the Brethren have counseled that the wife should be asked if she can support her husband in the new position. Having personally conducted these interviews many times, I have asked the wives to feel free to express their feelings, and often they do. I cannot recall having a wife say that she would not support her husband. However, some have told of busy schedules, or other circumstances that may have an impact on the calling. This information has been welcome and helpful.

When the father is functioning as the patriarch of his family, striving to love his wife as Christ loves the Church, presiding with faith and confidence, and trying to fulfill his responsibility by seeing that love, harmony, and support of gospel principles are always present, the home will ever feel the presence of our Father in Heaven.