Jesus Christ Is Your Strength
Modesty: My Long Journey
“Mom, give me ONE good reason I should dress modestly. I’ve heard them all.” (Or so I thought.)
I wish I could say that I grew up loving the principle of modesty, but truthfully, I didn’t. Although my parents taught me that modesty was important, I thought the immodest outfits on the shows I watched were much cuter than anything modest.
I heard a lot of reasons for dressing modestly that did not make sense to me, from “Modest is hottest” to “It’s your responsibility to dress modestly to keep boys’ thoughts out of the gutter.” The immodest way I dressed got me the attention I wanted. I was unwilling to even consider the blessings of dressing modestly, and I felt a lot of anger when people encouraged me to.
“Give Me One Good Reason”
One summer, I was going out with some friends. My mom saw the immodest outfit I was wearing and said, “Elizabeth, you are approaching adulthood. You really need to think about the kind of person you want to be, and with that comes the appearance you project.” When she said this, I was ready to fight.
“Mom, give me one good reason I should dress modestly. I’ve heard them all. And I’m still waiting to hear something that doesn’t involve boys and their thoughts. Give me something, anything, that makes sense.”
She looked out the window for a moment. After some time in silence, she looked up at me lovingly and quietly said, “Because it is a principle of obedience, and you love Heavenly Father.”
I was completely disarmed, unable to retort. Her words planted the seed I needed to begin to overcome this struggle.
The Truth about Modesty
I began to realize that modesty was not just about the way I dressed. Like the warnings in the scriptures against wearing costly apparel (see Alma 5:53; Mormon 8:36–39), my choice of clothing was just a symptom of being prideful in thought and behavior. And that pride was something I had held on to for so many years. I was unwilling to let go of what I wanted, which was really validation and attention, for what Heavenly Father wanted for me.
The For the Strength of Youth guide says, “Heavenly Father wants us to see each other for who we really are: not just physical bodies but His beloved children with a divine destiny” ([2022], 24). I began to see my body as sacred, something I needed to use to glorify God, not myself.
Filled with His Love
When I began to repent, Heavenly Father filled the parts of my heart that wanted attention with His love. This was so empowering and gave me so much hope that the desire for immodesty started to leave my soul.
The way I spoke started to change, my love for others grew, and my desire to serve increased. I didn’t just adopt the principle of obedience to God in my life; I began to love it. I could feel its protective power. This change helped me prepare to go to the temple and make beautiful, sacred covenants in His house.
I now love modesty because I love the principle of obedience, something I never thought would be the case. But Heavenly Father never gave up on me, and He will never give up on you in whatever you are struggling with, even if it is a long, bumpy journey.