Digital Only
Single and Pregnant—Important Decisions
The author lives in Utah, USA.
When I found out I was pregnant, I was grateful I could pray to know what to do next.
I was 22 years old when I faced the hardest decision I would ever make. The little blue plus sign did not seem real. I wasn’t ready to tell my family; instead, I turned to a friend. She accompanied me to a health-care unit to confirm my fears. My friend, trying to help, brought up abortion as a way to resolve my situation. She said that it could be my forever secret and that this way, I wouldn’t have to tell my family or the father of the baby.
Later, alone in my room, I thought about what my friend had said. An overwhelming feeling came, and I realized that I could not take this baby’s life away.1 I had made a choice that had led to this pregnancy, and now I needed to give this baby life so she could make her own choices.
Somehow I mustered the courage to tell my mom the news. Though disappointed in my actions, she supported me through everything. I also reached out to the father, who brought up adoption as an option. I hadn’t thought about it before then. Various choices swirled in my thoughts as my mom and I went to one of my first ultrasounds. The image on the screen showed my baby waving. In that moment, I knew that I needed to do whatever was best for my child.
I had fallen away from God for a long time, and I didn’t know if I even believed in Him anymore. But after that ultrasound, I fell to my knees and prayed, “What do I do, Father?”
My answer came slowly and softly, but at one point I shared with my mom the impression I felt: “This baby doesn’t feel like mine.” I began to look into adoption and eventually realized that this was the answer. I had felt the promise of Doctrine and Covenants 112:10: “Be thou humble; and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to thy prayers.”
I once again prayed with all my heart when it was time to meet the adoptive family. The meeting went well, but additional confirmation came when my dad, who had not been fully supportive of the adoption, asked the potential adoptive family if they could really love the baby as their own. The adoptive father answered with such a strong conviction: “We are all God’s children. It doesn’t matter how our children come to us; they are ours, and we love them.” That was when everyone, including my dad, felt that this was the right thing to do.
Everything seemed to just fall into place. Their family and mine have grown to be one big family. We celebrate birthdays and holidays together and gather for Sunday dinners. Following my repentance and the strengthening of my faith, I was able to see my daughter sealed to her parents and older sister in the temple. I have seen God’s love for me as He has helped me through my struggles, and I have seen His love for my daughter in placing her with her forever family.
Making the choice was not easy, but God has strengthened me. I know “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Philippians 4:13).