“Ko e hā ʻoku totonu ke u akoʻi ki heʻeku tamá ke fakahoko ʻi he taimi ʻokú ne sio ai ki he ponokalafí?” Tokoni maʻá e Ngaahi Mātuʻá (2021)
“Ko e hā ʻoku totonu ke u akoʻi ki heʻeku tamá ke fakahoko ʻi he taimi ʻokú ne sio ai ki he ponokalafí?” Tokoni maʻá e Ngaahi Mātuʻá
Ko e hā ʻoku totonu ke u akoʻi ki heʻeku tamá ke fakahoko ʻi he taimi ʻokú ne sio ai ki he ponokalafí?
Kuo fakatahaʻi ʻe he Siasí ha ngaahi fakakaukau mei ha kau mataotao ke nau faʻu ha foʻi vitiō ke tokoni ki he ngaahi mātuʻá ʻi hono kamataʻi ha ngaahi fealeaʻaki fekauʻaki mo e ponokalafí mo e fānau ʻi he toʻu ʻo e Palaimelí.(vakai, “What Should I Do When I See Pornography? (Ko e Hā ʻOku Totonu Ke u Fai ʻi he Taimi ʻOku ou Sio Ai he Ponokalafí?)”).
ʻOku akoʻi mai ʻe he vitiō ko ʻení:
-
Ko hotau sinó ko ha meʻaʻofa ia mei he ʻOtuá.
-
ʻOku kau ʻi hono tokangaʻi hotau sinó ʻa hono maluʻi kinautolú.
-
ʻOku ʻuhinga e ponokalafí ki ha ngaahi fakatātā ʻo ha kakai ʻoku siʻisiʻi pe ʻikai ha vala ʻoku tui. ʻOku lahi ha ngaahi feituʻu te tau lava ʻo sio ai ʻi he ponokalafí. ʻE lava foki ke mahulu hake ʻa e ponokalafí ʻi ha ngaahi fakatātā pē.
-
ʻOku ʻi ai ha konga ʻe ua ʻo hotau ʻutó: ko ha konga ʻo e fakakaukaú mo ha konga ʻo e ongó. ʻOku fusi ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa e konga ʻo e ongó ke tau feinga ke lahi ange ʻetau sió, ka te tau lava ʻo fakaʻaongaʻi ʻa e konga ʻo e fakakaukaú ke tau hanga kehe mei ai.
-
Naʻe ʻomi ʻe he ʻOtuá ha ngaahi ongo mālohi ʻo e fie ʻiló mo e fetokangaʻakí ke tokoniʻi kitautolu ke tau fie mali mo faʻu ha ngaahi fāmili.
-
ʻI he taimi ʻoku tau sio ai ki he ponokalafí, ʻoku totonu ke tau fakahoko ha meʻa ʻe tolu:
-
ʻAi ke ke ʻiloʻi ia pea pehē, “Ko e ponokalafí ia.”
-
Tamateʻi ia, pe tafoki mei ai.
-
Talaange ki ha mātuʻa pe tokotaha lahi falalaʻanga.
-
Ke kamataʻi e ngaahi fealēleaʻaki mo e toʻu tupú, mahalo ʻe saiʻia ange e ngaahi mātuʻá ke mamata ʻi he foʻi vitiō “How to Talk to Your Kids about Pornography (Founga Ke Talanoa ai ki Hoʻo Fānaú fekauʻaki mo e Ponokalafí).”
ʻOku akoʻi mai ʻe he vitiō ko ʻení:
-
ʻOku lelei ʻetau ngaahi ongo fakasekisualé pea kuo foaki mai ia ʻe he ʻOtuá kiate kitautolu. ʻI he taimi ʻoku fevahevaheʻaki totonu ai ʻi he nofo-malí, ʻe tokoni ʻa e ngaahi ongo ko ʻení ke fakatahaʻi ʻa e ngaahi hoa malí mo faʻu ha ngaahi fāmili.
-
ʻOku mātuʻaki mahuʻinga ʻa e fetalanoaʻaki tauʻatāina mo ʻofa mo e toʻu tupú. ʻOku fakanatula pē ʻetau fieʻilo ki he fehokotaki fakasinó. Ko hoʻo taumuʻa ko e mātuʻá ke fakamahinoʻi ia mo foaki ha poupou. ʻI he taimi ʻoku ongoʻi ai ʻe he toʻu tupú te nau lava ʻo talanoa mo ha tokotaha lahi falalaʻangá, ʻe ala lava ange ke nau vahevahe ʻenau ngaahi fehuʻí, ngaahi aʻusiá mo e ngaahi ongó.
-
ʻOku fieʻilo ha toʻu tupu tokolahi ki he ʻuhinga ʻoku fakatuʻutāmaki ai ʻa e ponokalafí. Te mou lava ʻo aleaʻi ʻa e founga ʻoku fakaʻaliʻali ai ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa e ngaahi vā fetuʻutaki halá pea ʻoku fakahaaʻi ai ʻa e kakaí ko ha meʻa ke puleʻi kae ʻikai ko ha kakai moʻoni ʻoku ʻi ai haʻanau ngaahi fakakaukau mo e ngaahi ongo. Te mou lava foki ʻo aleaʻi e founga ʻoku uesia ai ʻe he ponokalafí e fakalakalaka ʻo e ʻatamai ʻo ha tokotaha taʻu hongofulu tupu ʻi heʻene ako ki he founga hono fai ʻo ha ngaahi filí.1
-
Kapau kuo mamata ponokalafi hoʻo fānau toʻu tupú, ʻoku ʻikai ʻuhinga ia ʻoku maʻunimā ia ʻe he ponokalafí.
Ko e ʻapí ʻa e feituʻu lelei taha ki he fānaú ke ako mo alea ai fekauʻaki mo e tōʻonga fakasekisualé. ʻOku kau heni ʻa e ako fekauʻaki mo e ala mo e ʻofa ʻoku leleí, ngaahi lea ʻofá, mo e mahuʻinga ʻo e tōʻonga fakasekisualé ʻi he nofo-malí. ʻI hoʻo tokoniʻi hoʻo tamá ke maʻu ha mahino ʻoku lelei ki he tōʻonga fakasekisualé, ʻokú ne ako e founga ke ʻilo ai ʻa e totonú mei he halá. ʻOkú ke tokoni foki ke teuteuʻi hoʻo tamá ki he ngaahi fatongia ʻo ha hoa mali mo e mātuʻá.
Ngaahi Fakakaukau Lahi Ange
Tokoni ke mahino ki hoʻo fānaú ʻa e fehokotaki ʻi he vahaʻa ʻo e ngaahi ongo fakasekisuale ʻoku nau maʻu pe te nau maʻú pea mo e ʻulungaanga fakasekisuale ʻoku totonu ke fakatatali kae ʻoua leva kuo malí. Akoʻi kiate kinautolu ʻoku ʻikai ke nau angakehe koeʻuhí ʻoku nau fieʻilo ki he tōʻonga fakasekisualé pe koeʻuhí kuo nau mamata ʻi he ponokalafí. ʻE ala tokoni ʻa e vitiō “Replacing Myth with Truth: A Better Way to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography (Fakafetongi e Talatupuʻá ʻAki e Moʻoní: Ko Ha Founga Lelei Ange ke Talanoa ki Hoʻo Fānaú Fekauʻaki mo e Ponokalafí)” ke tataki hoʻomou fepōtalanoaʻakí.2 Te ke lava foki ʻo fakakaukau ki hoʻo ngaahi aʻusia pē ʻaʻau ʻi hoʻo ako fekauʻaki mo e tōʻonga fakasekisualé. Ko e hā ha meʻa te ke toe fakahoko? Ko e hā ha meʻa ʻokú ke fakaʻamu naʻe kehe hoʻo fakahokó?
Fehuʻi ki hoʻo fānaú pe ko e hā ʻenau ongó ʻi he taimi ʻoku nau fanongo ai ki ha talanoa ʻa ha taha fekauʻaki mo e fehokotaki fakasinó pe taimi ʻoku nau sio ai ki ha fakatātā taʻefeʻungá. Aleaʻi ha ngaahi founga ke tali ʻaki e ngaahi tūkungá—ʻo tatau pē ʻi ʻapi mo mavahe mei ʻapí—ʻi ha feituʻu ʻoku ʻikai fakafofongaʻi ai ʻa e fehokotaki fakasinó mo e tōʻonga fakasekisualé ʻi ha founga fakaʻapaʻapa pe langaki moʻuí.
Fakaʻaliʻali ha ngaahi fakatātā ʻo hoʻo fānaú pe fāmilí. Vahevahe hoʻo ngaahi ongo fekauʻaki mo e taimi naʻe fāʻeleʻi ai hoʻo fānaú pe fekauʻaki mo e fiefia mo e fiemālie ʻoku nau ʻomi ki hoʻo moʻuí. Fakamatalaʻi ange ʻoku fakataumuʻa ʻa e fehokotaki fakasinó ke fakahaaʻi ʻa e ʻofá pea ʻoku malava ai ke fāʻeleʻi ʻa e fānaú mo e ngaahi fāmilí ke nau fakataha. Vakai ki he “Ko e Fāmilí: Ko ha Fanongonongo ki Māmani” ke tokoni ʻi hono akoʻi e tokāteline ʻo e nofo-malí.