Fakahaaʻi ‘Okú ke Tokanga

ʻOku lahi ha ngaahi founga te tau lava ʻo fakahaaʻi ai ʻoku tau ʻofa, tautautefito ʻi he taimi Kilisimasí. Te tau lava ke lea ʻaki ia, text, tohi ha pōpoaki, foaki, vahevahe, lotua, taʻo ha meʻa, hivaʻi, fāʻofua, tā ha foʻi hiva, tō ha fuʻu ʻakau pē fakahoko ha ngāue fakamaʻa. ʻAhiʻahi fakahoko ia.

ʻĪmisi

communicating you care

Ko e uho ʻo e ngāue fakaetauhí ke fakahaaʻi e ʻofá ki he niʻihi kehé. Naʻe pehē ʻe Sisitā Sini B. Pingihemi, ko e Palesiteni Lahi ʻo e Fineʻofá: “ʻOku toki fakahoko pē ʻa e ngāue fakaetauhi moʻoní ʻi he aʻutonu fakatāutaha ki aí ʻo fakalotoa ʻe he ʻofá. … ʻI hono fakalotoa ʻe he ʻofá, ʻe hoko ha ngaahi mana, pea te tau ʻilo ha ngaahi founga ke ʻomi ai hotau kāinga kuo ‘pulí’ ke talitali lelei mo fālute ʻe he ongoongolelei ʻo Sīsū Kalaisí.”¹

Ko hono fakahaaʻi ko ia ki he niʻihi kehé ʻetau tokangá ko ha konga mahuʻinga ia hono fakatupulaki ʻo e ngaahi vā fetuʻutaki fakatāutahá. Ka ʻe kehekehe pē ʻa e ongo ʻe maʻu ʻe he kakaí takitaha. ʻE founga fēfē leva haʻatau fakahaaʻi ʻetau ʻofa ki he niʻihi kehé ʻi ha ngaahi founga ʻe mahino mo nau fakahoungaʻi? Ko ha ngaahi founga ʻeni ke fakahaaʻi ai ʻoku tau tokanga, fakataha mo ha ngaahi fakakaukau ke kamata ʻaki.

Lea ʻAki Ia

Taimi ʻe niʻihi he ʻikai ke ʻi ai ha meʻa ʻe toe lelei ange ʻi hoʻo lea ʻaki e ngaahi ongo ʻokú ke maʻu fekauʻaki mo ha taha. Neongo ʻe ala ʻuhinga ʻeni ke ke talaange ai ki ha taha ʻokú ke ʻofa ʻiate ia, ka ʻoku kau foki ai haʻo vahevahe e meʻa ʻokú ke saiʻia ai ʻiate kinautolú pe fakahoko ha fakahikihikiʻi moʻoni. ʻOku tokoni ʻa e fakamahino ko ʻení ke fakamālohia hotau ngaahi vā fetuʻutakí. (Vakai, ʻEfesō 4:29.)

Kumi ha faingamālie ke fakahā ai ki he tokotahá ʻokú ke saiʻia ha taha ʻo hono ngaahi mālohingá.
ʻAʻahi ki ai, telefoni ki ai, pe ʻīmeili, text, pe ʻave ha kaati ʻo fakahaaʻi ange ʻokú ke fakakaukau kiate kinautolu.

ʻAʻahi

Ko e tuku ko ia ha taimi ke talanoa mo fakafanongo ki ha tahá, ko ha founga lelei ia ke fakahaaʻi ai e lahi hoʻo fakamahuʻingaʻi iá. Neongo pe ʻokú mo talanoa ʻi ʻapi, lotú, pe ha toe feituʻu, ka ʻoku tokolahi ha kakai ʻoku nau fie maʻu ha taha ke nau talanoa mo ia. (Vakai, Mōsaia 4:26; T&F 20:47.)

Fokotuʻu haʻo taimi ʻaʻahi ʻo fakatatau mo e fie maʻu ʻa e tokotaha ko iá. Tuku ha taimi ke ke fakafanongo moʻoni ai mo mahino hono ngaahi tūkungá.
ʻI he ngahi feituʻu ʻe faingataʻa ai ke ʻaʻahi ki he ngaahi ʻapí koeʻuhi ko e vā-mamaʻó, ngaahi tūkunga fakafonuá, pe ha toe ngaahi tūkunga pē, fakakaukau ke kumi ha taimi ke mou fakataha ai ʻi he hili e ngaahi fakatahaʻanga ʻa e Siasí.

Tokoni ʻaki ha Taumuʻa

Manatuʻi ʻa e ngaahi fie maʻu ʻa e fakafoʻituituí mo e fāmilí. ʻOku fakahaaʻi ʻe he ngāue tokoni ʻuhingamālié, ʻokú ke ʻofa. ʻOkú ne fakatahaʻi e meʻaʻofa mahuʻinga ʻo e taimí mo e ngāue fakapotopotó. Naʻe pehē ʻe Sisitā Pingihemi, “ʻOku lava e fanga kiʻi ngāue tokoni faingofua ʻo hoko ko ha ivi tākiekina mālohi ki he niʻihi kehé.”²

Fai ha ngaahi ngāue tokoni ʻokú ne fakamālohia ʻa e fakafoʻituituí pē ngaahi fāmilí, hangē ko e tokoni ki hono tokangaʻi e fānaú kae lava e mātuʻá ʻo ō ki he temipalé.
Kumi ha ngaahi founga ke fakamaʻamaʻa ai e ngaahi kavengá ʻi he taimi ʻoku lōmekina ai e moʻuí, hangē ko hono fufulu e ngaahi matapā sioʻatá, luelue mo e kulií, pe tokoni ʻi honau ʻapí.

Fai Fakataha ha Ngaahi Meʻa

ʻOku ʻi ai ha niʻihi ʻoku ʻikai fai ha fetaulaki lelei ʻi he ngaahi talanoa fakamātoató. Ko ha kakai ʻe niʻihi, ʻoku hoko ʻa e fetuʻutaki ʻi hano kumi ha ngaahi meʻa ʻoku tau mahuʻingaʻia tatau ai pea fakaʻaongaʻi ha taimi ʻi hono fai fakataha e ngaahi meʻa ko iá. Kuo naʻinaʻi mai e ʻEikí ke tau “ʻiate kinautolu mo fakamālohia” (T&F 20:53) hotau kāingá.

Mou ō ʻo luelue, palani ha pō vaʻinga, pe fokotuʻu ha taimi tuʻu pau ke mou fakamālohisino fakataha ai.
Ngāue fakataha ʻi ha ngāue tokoni ʻa e koló pe Siasí.

Foaki ha Meʻaʻofa

ʻI he taimi ʻe niʻihi ʻoku siʻisiʻi e taimi pe ngaahi faingamālie ke feohí. ʻI ha ngaahi ʻulungaanga fakafonua lahi, ʻoku hoko e foaki meʻaʻofá ko ha fakaʻilonga ʻo e ʻofá mo e tokangá. ʻE lava foki mo e toutou foaki ha kiʻi meʻaʻofá ke fakahaaʻi ai hoʻo loto ke fokotuʻu ha vā fetuʻutaki ʻoku lelei angé. (Vakai, Lea Fakatātā 21:14.)

ʻAve maʻanautolu ha fakaneifua ʻoku nau manako taha aí.
Vahevahe ha lea, potufolofola, pe ha pōpōaki kehe ʻokú ke ongoʻi ʻe ʻaonga kiate kinautolu.

Ko ha Ngāue ʻo e ʻOfá

ʻI he fakaʻau ke ke maheni mo kinautolu ʻokú ke ngāue fakaetauhi ki ai pea ʻokú ke feinga ke maʻu ha ueʻi fakalaumālie ki aí, te ke ʻilo pau ai e founga ke ke fakahaaʻi ai hoʻo ʻofá mo e tokangá kiate kinautolu fakafoʻituitui.

ʻOku fai ʻe Kimipelī Seipoloti mei ʻOlikoni, USA ha talanoa ʻi he taimi naʻá ne fekumi ai ki ha tataki fakalaumālié mo foaki ha ngaahi meʻaʻofa ke fakahaaʻi ʻene ʻofá:

“ʻI he taimi ʻoku ou ongoʻi loto mamahi aí, ʻoku ou tuʻu ki ʻolunga ʻo taʻo mā sukini (zucchini), ʻo meimei ko ha ngaahi foʻi mā ʻe valu. Ko e meʻa makehe ʻoku ou fakaʻaongaʻi ke ngaohi ʻakí ko e kiʻi lotu fakalongolongo ʻoku ou fai lolotonga hono taʻó, ke u ʻiloʻi pe ko hai ʻokú ne fie maʻu e ngaahi foʻi mā ko iá. Kuó u toe maheni lelei ange mo hoku ngaahi kaungāʻapí ʻi he hoko ʻa e foʻi mā sukini mafaná ko ha founga ke nau fakaafeʻi ai au ki honau ngaahi ʻapí mo ʻenau moʻuí.

“ʻI ha ʻaho ʻe taha ʻi he faʻahitaʻu māfaná, naʻá ku afe atu ʻi ha fāmili he veʻehalá naʻa nau fakatau fuamelie. Naʻe ʻikai ke u toe fie maʻu fuamelie, ka naʻe fiefia lahi e kiʻi tamasiʻi sino siʻisiʻí ʻi heʻene sio mai mo ʻamanaki pē ko e tokotaha hoko au ke u fakatau ʻene fuamelié. Naʻá ku fakatau ha fuamelie, ka naʻe ʻi ai foki mo ʻeku meʻaʻofa maʻana. Naʻá ku foaki ange ki he kiʻi tamasiʻí ha foʻi mā ʻe ua. Naʻá ne tafoki ki heʻene tamaí pe ʻe sai pē, ʻo ne pehē ange, ‘Sio Teti, ko ʻeni ʻoku maʻu pē meʻa ke tau kai he ʻahó ni.’ Naʻá ku ongoʻi fiefia moʻoni ʻi he faingamālie ke fakahaaʻi ʻeku ʻofá ʻi ha founga faingofuá.”

Naʻe kole ʻe ʻEletā Sefilī R. Hōlani ʻo e Kōlomu ʻo e Kau ʻAposetolo ʻe Toko Hongofulu Mā Uá, ki he “tangata mo e fefine taki taha—pea mo ʻetau kau talavou mo e finemui matuʻotuʻa angé—[ke nau] tukupā lahi ange ke fetauhiʻaki ʻi he ʻofa, ʻo fai ia tuʻunga pē ʻi he ʻofa haohaoa ʻa Kalaisí. … ʻOfa ke tau ngāue fetākinima mo e ʻEiki ʻo e ngouevainé, ʻo foaki ki he ʻOtuá mo ʻetau Tamaí ha nima fietokoni ʻi he fatongia mafatukituki ko hono tali ʻo e ngaahi lotú, fai ha fakafiemālié, holoholoʻi ʻa e loʻimatá, pea fakamālohia e ngaahi tui ʻoku vaivaí.”³

ʻOku Tokanga ʻa Sīsū Kalaisi

Kimuʻa hono fokotuʻu ʻe Sīsū Kalaisi ʻa Lāsalosi mei he maté, “[Naʻe] tangi ʻa Sīsū.

“Pea lea ai ʻa e kau Siú, Vakai ki hono lahi ʻo ʻene ʻofa kiate iá.” (Sione 11:35–36).

Naʻe folofola ʻa Sīsū ki he kau Nīfaí, “ʻOku ou ʻofa mamahi kiate kimoutolu.” Peá Ne ui ʻa kinautolu ʻoku puke mo faingataʻaʻiá, ʻa honau niʻihi ne ketu pe kuí pea “naʻá Ne fakamoʻui ʻa kinautolu” (vakai, 3 Nīfai 17:7–9).

Naʻe tā ʻe Sīsū e sīpingá maʻatautolu ʻi Heʻene tokanga ki he niʻihi kehé. Naʻá Ne akoʻi kitautolu ʻo pehē:

“Ke ke ‘ofa [ki he ʻEiki] ko ho ‘Otuá ‘aki ho laumālié kotoa, mo ho‘o mo‘uí kotoa, mo ho lotó kotoa.

“Ko e ʻuluaki pea ko e lahi ia ʻo e fekaú.

“Pea ko hono ua ʻoku tatau mo iá, Ke ke ʻofa ki ho kaungāʻapí ʻo hangē pē ko koé” (Mātiu 22:37–39).

Ko hai ʻokú ne fie maʻu hoʻo tokangá? Te ke lava fēfē ʻo fakahā ange ʻokú ke tokanga?