Fefaʻuhi mo e Ponokalafí: Maluʻi, Tali, & Fakamoʻui

Fai ʻe Joy D. Jones

Palesiteni Lahi ʻo e Palaimelí

Mei ha malanga ʻi he tefitoʻi fakakaukaú naʻe fai ʻi he konifelenisi ʻa e Kautaha Fakatahataha ʻa ʻIutā ke Fakafepakiʻi e Ponokalafí 2018, ʻi Sōleki Siti, ʻIutā.

ʻE ala tokoni ʻa e ngaahi founga ʻe tolu ko ʻeni ʻo e ʻofá ki heʻetau fānaú ʻi he ngaahi fakafepaki te nau ala fehangahangai mo ia fekauʻaki mo e ponokalafí.

ʻOku fakamamahi kiate au ʻa ʻeku ʻilo ki he ivi tākiekina ʻoku maʻu ʻe he ponokalafí ki he iiki taha ʻi hotau sosaietí—ʻa ʻetau fānaú. ʻE malava ke fakatupu ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa e ongoʻi fakamāʻiá, takihalaʻí, ongoʻi taʻetotonú, mole e mapuleʻi kitá, lomekina ʻe he maʻunimaá, pea fakamoleki kotoa ki ai e taimí, fakakaukaú mo e iví, ko ha fakakina ʻoku lahi fau. ʻOku fuʻu fie maʻu kitautolu hono kotoa—ʻa e mātuʻá, fāmilí, kau faiakó, kau takí—ke tau mamata moʻoni, mahuʻingaʻia, mo maluʻi ʻetau fānaú mo e toʻu tupú.

ʻOku kau ʻa e ʻofá ʻi he ngaahi meʻaʻofa maʻongoʻonga taha ʻa e ʻOtuá. Ko e ʻofa ki he ʻOtuá mo e ʻofa ki he kaungāʻapí ko e ongo fekau lahi taha ia kuo ʻomi kiate kitautolu meia Sīsū Kalaisí. ʻOku ou tui ko e ʻofá ko ʻetau meʻatau maʻongoʻonga taha foki ia ki hono tauʻi ʻo e ponokalafí.

Ko hono moʻoní, ʻoku hangē ko e kananga ʻoku pehē, “ʻoku tamateʻi ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa e ʻofá,” ka ke tau toe manatuʻi foki ʻoku tamateʻi ʻe he ʻofá ʻa e ponokalafí. ʻOku ʻikai ke ʻuhinga ia ʻe malava heʻetau ʻofa ki ha taha ʻo liliu ʻenau maʻunimaá pe ko ʻenau tōʻongá. Ka ʻe lava ʻe he ʻofá ʻo fakaʻaiʻai kitautolu—ʻi he founga ke tau mateuteu aí, founga ke tau tali ʻakí, founga ke tau fanongo aí—ʻo tautautefito ki heʻetau fānaú. Kapau te tau maʻu ha ʻamanaki lelei ke fakangata ʻa e mahaki fakaʻauha ko ʻení mei māmani, kuo pau ke muʻomuʻa ʻa e ʻofá pea hoko ia ko e makatuʻunga ʻo ʻetau ngaahi feinga kotoa pē.

ʻOku ou fie fokotuʻu atu ha founga ʻe tolu ki hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo e ʻofá ʻa ia ʻoku ou fakaʻamu te tau tokanga, tali, pea mo fakahoko ia. Ko e founga ʻe tolu ko ʻení ʻoku pīkinga ia ki he konga ʻe tolu ʻo e fepaki mo e ponokalafí ʻe ala fehangahangai mo ʻetau fānaú.

ʻUluakí, tau fakahaaʻi ʻa e “ʻOku ou ʻofa ʻiate koé” ʻaki ʻetau maluʻi moʻoni kinautolu. Ko hono uá, tau fakahaaʻi ʻa e “ʻOku ou kei ʻofa ʻiate koé” ʻaki e founga ʻoku tau tali ʻaki ʻenau ʻilo ki he ponokalafí, pe ne nau taumuʻa pehē pe ʻikai. Pea ko hono tolú, tau fakahaaʻi ʻa e “Te u ʻofa maʻu pē ʻiate koé” ʻaki ʻetau tokoniʻi kinautolu ʻi heʻenau ngāue ke fakaakeaké ʻo kapau kuo fuʻu tōtuʻa ʻenau ngāue ʻaki iá pe aʻusia ʻa e maʻunimaá. ʻI he kupuʻi lea kotoa pē, ko e ʻofá ʻa e meʻa mahuʻinga tahá.

1. Maluʻi: “ʻOku Ou ʻOfa ʻIate Koe”

Fakakaukauloto ki ha fānau ʻokú ke ʻofa ai. ʻI he taimi ʻokú ke pehē ange ai ki he fānau ko ʻení, “ʻOku ou ʻofa ʻiate koé,” ʻoku ʻuhinga ia ki he hā? Ko hono moʻoní, ʻoku ʻuhinga ia ke tau ʻoange ʻa e maluʻi koeʻuhí ke tau lava ʻo tokoniʻi ʻa kinautolu ʻoku tau ʻofa aí ke nau aʻusia honau lelei tahá mo fehangahangai mo e ngaahi pole ʻo e moʻuí. Ko e konga ʻo e maluʻí ko hono fakatupu ha ngaahi vā fetuʻutaki ʻoku mālohi, falalaʻanga, mo hokohoko leleí. ʻOku tokoni ʻa e faʻahinga vā fetuʻutaki ko ʻení ke fakamālohia ai ʻetau vā mo ʻetau fānaú. ʻI heʻetau langa ha vā fetuʻutaki mālohi ʻoku falalaʻangá pea maluʻi ʻetau fānaú mo e makapuná—pe ko ha fānau pē—ʻoku tau ʻoange ai ha potu ʻoku malú maʻanautolu ke nau kumi tokoni ki ai. ʻOku tokoni ʻa e maluʻi ko ʻení ke mahino kiate kinautolu honau natula totonú pea tokoniʻi kinautolu ke mahino honau vā mo e ʻOtuá. ʻOku tokoni ʻa e ongoʻi mahuʻingaʻia mo ʻofaʻí ke maʻu ai ʻe he fānaú ʻa e mahinó pea ke nau falala ki ha Tamai Hēvani ʻofa ʻokú Ne ʻomi e ngaahi fakahinohinó maʻa ʻenau fiefiá.

ʻOku ou hohaʻa naʻa kuo tokolahi ha ngaahi mātuʻa ʻoku teʻeki ke nau ʻiloʻi moʻoni ʻa hono fakatuʻutāmaki ʻo e ponokalafí pe ʻoku nau fakakaukau ko ha palopalema pē ia maʻá e kakai kehé. Ko hono moʻoní, ʻoku uesia ʻe he palopalema ko ʻení ʻa ʻetau fānau tangatá mo ʻetau fānau fefiné, pea ʻoku ʻikai ke lahi feʻunga ʻetau talanoa kau ki aí.

ʻI he ngaahi taʻu lahi kuo mahili atú, ne ma fanongo mo hoku husepānití ki ha talanoa ʻuhingamālie ʻa ia kuo tā tuʻo lahi ʻema talanoa ki heʻema fānaú. Ko e talanoá ʻoku fekauʻaki ia mo ha ngata huhu kona matuʻotuʻa naʻá ne kole ki ha kiʻi tamasiʻi kei talavou ke ne fua ia ki he funga moʻungá ke ne sio fakaʻosi ki he tō ʻa e laʻaá kimuʻa pea mate ʻa e ngatá. Naʻe momou ʻa e tamasiʻí ka naʻe palōmesi ange ʻe he ngata huhu koná he ʻikai ke ne uʻu ia kapau te ne ʻave ia. Hili ʻa e fakavaivai ko iá, naʻe angaʻofa ʻa e tamasiʻí ke ne fua ʻa e ngatá ki he tumutumu ʻo e moʻungá ʻa ia ne na mātā fakataha ai e tō ʻa e laʻaá.

Hili hono fua fakafoki hifo ʻe he tamasiʻí ʻa e ngatá ki he teleʻá, naʻá ne teuteuʻi ha meʻatokoni mo ha mohenga maʻana ki he pō ko iá. ʻI he pongipongi haké, naʻe kole ange ʻe he ngatá, “Kātaki muʻa tamasiʻi, ʻe lava ke ke toe fakafoki au ki hoku ʻapí? Kuo taimi ke u mavahe mei he māmani ko ʻení, pea ʻoku ou fie foki ki hoku ʻapí.” Naʻe ongoʻi ʻe he kiʻi tamasiʻí ʻokú ne malu pea naʻe tauhi ʻe he ngatá ʻa ʻene leá, ko ia naʻá ne fakakaukau ai ke ne fakafoki ʻa e ngatá ʻo hangē ko ʻene kolé.

Naʻá ne toʻo hake ʻa e ngatá ʻo ne puke ia ki hono fatafatá, peá ne fua fakafoki ia ki hono ʻapi ʻi he toafá ke ne mate ai. Kimuʻa siʻi pē peá ne tuku hifo ʻa e ngatá ki laló, naʻe tafoki ʻa e ngata huhu koná ʻo uʻu hono fatafatá. Naʻe kaila ʻa e kiʻi tamasiʻí mo ne lī ʻa e ngatá ki he kelekelé. “ʻE Ngata, ko e hā naʻá ke fai ai iá? Kuo pau leva ke u mate he taimí ni!” Naʻe sio hake ʻa e ngata huhu koná kiate ia mo ne mamali ʻo pehē: “Naʻá ke ʻosi ʻiloʻi pē hoku natulá ʻi hoʻo fua hake aú.”

ʻI he kuongá ni, ʻoku ou sio ki hono ʻoange ʻe he mātuʻá ʻa e ngatá ki he fānaú. ʻOku ou ʻuhinga ki he telefoni toʻotoʻó. He ʻikai ke tau ʻoange ʻa e telefoni toʻotoʻo ʻoku hū ki he ʻinitanetí ki he nima ʻo ʻetau fānau īkí, ʻa ia ʻoku ʻikai ke nau matuʻotuʻa feʻunga ke akonakiʻi lelei kinautolu, teʻeki ke nau malava ʻo fakaʻuhinga mo fili fakapotopoto, pea ʻikai ke nau maʻu e puleʻi ʻa e mātuʻá mo e ngaahi meʻangāue kehe ke tokoni ke maluʻi kinautolú. Naʻe pehē ʻe Seisoni S. Kalolo, ko ha palōfesa ʻo e moʻui fakafāmilí ʻi he ʻUnivēsiti Pilikihami ʻIongí, “ʻOku tau maluʻi ʻetau fānaú kae ʻoua kuo aʻu ki he taimi ke nau malava ai ʻo maluʻi pē kinautolú.” ʻOku ʻuluaki tupu e konga ʻo e ʻatamaí ʻokú ne pukepuke ʻa e ʻelito ʻo e fiefiá. ʻOku toki kimui ange ʻa e tupu kakato ʻa e konga ki muʻa ʻo e ʻatamaí ʻa ia ʻoku malava ke ne fai e fakaʻuhingá mo e fili fakapotopotó. “Ko ia ʻoku malava ʻe he fānaú ke nau ongoʻi ʻa e fiefiá, kae ʻikai ke nau malava ʻo mapuleʻi ʻenau angafaí.”¹

ʻOku totonu ke ʻi ai ha maluʻi ʻi he telefoni kotoa pē, ʻo kau ai ʻa e toʻu tupú’. Ko ha faleʻi lelei foki ʻeni ki he kakai lalahí. ʻOku ʻikai ha taha ʻe malu mei he uʻu ʻa e ngata huhu koná. ʻOku fili ʻe he mātuʻa ʻe niʻihi ʻa e telefoni pelú maʻa ʻenau fānaú ke fakangatangata pē ki he telefoní mo e text.

Makehe mei he telefoni toʻotoʻó ʻoku taʻefaʻalaua ʻa e ʻū meʻangāue fakaʻilekitulōnika ʻoku malava ke hū ki he mītia ʻoku ʻikai fiemaʻú ʻo fakafou ʻi he ʻinitanetí. Naʻe hā ʻi ha fakatotolo fakamuimui ko e pēseti ʻe 79 ʻo e ʻilo ki he ponokalafí ʻoku hoko ia ʻi ʻapi.² ʻOku malava ʻe he fānaú ke nau hū ki ai ʻi he tablets, telefoni toʻotoʻó, keimí, mīsini DVD toʻotoʻó, mo e TV, ka ko ha niʻihi siʻi pē ia ʻo e ʻū meʻangāue fakaʻilekitulōniká. ʻOku ou ʻiloʻi ha ngaahi fāmili kuo nau fokotuʻu ha feituʻu pē taha ʻi honau ʻapí ʻa ia kuo pau ke fakaʻaongaʻi ai ʻa e ʻū meʻangāue fakaʻilekitulōniká. ʻOku ui ia ʻe he ngaahi fāmili ko ʻení ko e “loki mītiá,” pea ʻoku tuku ʻenau ʻū meʻangāue fakaʻilekitulōniká ke lava ʻe he tokotaha kotoa pē ʻo mamata ki ai, ʻi he māmá. ʻOku ʻikai ha taimi ʻe nofo toko taha ai ha taha ʻi he lokí mo ha meʻangāue fakaʻilekitulōnika.

Kuo fili ʻe he ngaahi fāmili ʻe niʻihi ʻa e ngaahi lao hangē ko e tapu ke ʻi ai ha telefoni ʻi he loki mohé pe falekaukaú. ʻOku pehē ʻe ha niʻihi, “ʻOua naʻa teitei nofo toko taha mo ha telefoni.” Ka ko ha niʻihi ʻoku nau fakangofua māmālie ʻa e ngaahi apps ʻoku malava heʻenau fānaú ke fakaʻaongaʻí ʻaki ha polokalama ʻokú ne fakaʻatā e telefoni ʻa e fānaú ke fakapolokalamaʻi ʻe he mātuʻá. ʻI he founga ko ʻení, ʻoku nau akoʻi ai ko e falalá ʻoku ngāueʻi pea ʻoku mahuʻinga e malu ʻi hono fakaʻaongaʻi e telefoní.

ʻOku tatau ai pē pe ko e hā e ngaahi fie maʻu hotau fāmilí, tau akoʻi muʻa ʻa e mēmipa takitaha ʻo e fāmilí ke nau fakaʻaongaʻi fakapotopoto ki he leleí ʻa e tekinolosiá mei he kamataʻangá—ke nau fakatupulaki ha fakakaukau ʻoku maʻá. Tau akoʻi muʻa ki he fānaú ʻa e ngaahi founga ʻaonga ki hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo e tekinolosiá ki he leleí. Te tau lava ʻo akoʻi kinautolu ke nau fakafuofuaʻi ʻaki ʻenau fehuʻi pē kiate kinautolu, “ʻE maʻu nai ha ola lelei ʻi hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻení?” ʻE tākiekina heʻetau ngaahi fili he taimí ni ki he founga ke akoʻi ʻaki hotau fāmilí ʻa e ngaahi toʻu tangata ʻi he kahaʻú.

ʻI hotau tuʻunga ko e mātuʻá, ʻoku ou fakatauange te tau fakakaukau ki hono mahuʻinga ʻo hotau vā mo ʻetau fānaú pea mo e ngaahi ngāue pau ʻoku tau fakahoko ke maluʻi kinautolú. ʻI heʻetau fakamālohia ʻa e ngaahi vā feʻofaʻaki ko ʻení, ʻe mahino lelei ange ai ki he fānaú ʻa e ʻuhinga ʻoku fakatokanga mai ai ʻe he ʻOtuá ʻa e fakatuʻutāmaki ʻo e ponokalafí, te nau ʻiloʻi ʻa e founga ke fakaʻehiʻehi mei aí, pea te nau mateuteu leva kapau te nau fehangahangai mo ia.

2. Tali: “ʻOku Ou Kei ʻOfa ʻIate Koe”

ʻOku ʻikai ke faingofua ʻa hono fakatupu ha fepōtalanoaʻaki lelei, faitotonu, mo fakakaumeʻa ʻa ia ʻokú ne poupouʻi ʻa e fānaú ke nau vahevahe ʻenau fakakaukaú, aʻusiá, mo e fehuʻí mo ʻenau mātuʻá. ʻE lava ke tau fakaafeʻi ʻa e fānau ʻi he toʻu kotoa ke nau haʻu ʻo talanoa mo kitautolu kapau, pe ʻi he taimi, ʻoku kamata ai ha faʻahinga tuʻunga ʻo e palopalema ki he ponokalafí—mei he fuofua ʻilo fakatuʻupakeé ki he faʻa fakaʻaongaʻí, ki he fakaʻaongaʻi maʻu peé, ʻo aʻu pē ki he fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo fuʻu tōtuʻá. ʻOku sai ange ke fealeaʻaki ʻi he kamataʻangá, pea ʻe mateuteu ange ai e fānaú ke nau talanoa mo kitautolu ʻi he taimi ʻoku nau ʻiloʻi ai ʻoku ʻofaʻi kinautolú pea he ʻikai ha meʻa te nau lea ʻaki pe fakahoko te ne liliu e ʻofa ko iá.

Ka neongo iá, ʻoku hāhāmolofia ke haʻu ha fānau ʻo tala moʻoni ʻiate kinautolu pē. ʻOku faʻa hoko ia ʻi he taimi ʻoku fakatokanga ai ʻe ha mātuʻa tokanga ki ha fānau ʻaki ʻene fehuʻi ange, “ʻOku ʻi ai nai ha meʻa ʻoku hoko?” pe “Hangē ʻokú ke ngali kehé.” Ko e lahi ange e ʻofa ʻoku ongoʻi ʻe he fānaú, ko e faingofua ange ia ke ne tala totonu fekauʻaki mo ha meʻa.

ʻOku tuʻu ʻi honau ʻatamaí ʻa e fakapapauʻi ko ʻeni ʻo e ʻofá mei he fanga kiʻi aʻusia iiki ʻoku faʻa hoko maʻu peé. ʻOku fakatupunga ʻe hono talanoaʻi ʻi he ʻofa ʻa e fanga kiʻi palopalema īkí ha fakavaʻe ʻo ha tali lelei, koeʻuhí ko e taimi ʻe hoko ai ʻa e ngaahi palopalema lalahí, ʻe kei faingofua pē ʻa e fetuʻutakí. Ko e mahuʻinga tahá ko e ʻiloʻi ʻe he fānaú ʻe pehē hoʻo talí “ʻOku ou kei ʻofa ʻiate koe. ʻOku ʻikai ke ʻosi ʻeku ʻofa ʻiate koé koeʻuhí ne hoko ha meʻa. ʻOku ou ʻofa maʻu pē ʻiate koe.”

ʻOku ʻikai ke tau faʻa talanoa ki he toʻu tupú ʻi ha faʻahinga ʻuhinga, mo e fānaú fekauʻaki mo e taha ʻo e ngaahi teke mālohi mo e ʻahiʻahi lalahi taha te nau fehangahangai mo iá. ʻOku hoko ʻetau taʻe fie fai iá ke nau mateuteu ai ke akoʻi kinautolu ʻe he ʻinitanetí, fānau pe toʻu tupu kehé, pea naʻa mo e mītia ʻoku manakoá. Mahalo ko ha niʻihi ʻiate kitautolu ʻoku tau momou ke fakaʻaongaʻi ʻa e foʻi lea ponokalafi ʻi he haʻohaʻonga ʻo e fānaú ko e feinga ke maluʻi ʻenau fakakaukau maʻá. ʻOku ongo faikehe ia. Mahalo naʻe ʻikai teitei talanoa mahino pehē ʻetau mātuʻá mo kitautolu. Fēfē kapau ʻoku hoko ʻetau fepōtalanoaʻakí ke ne fakaʻaiʻai ke nau fie ʻilo? Fēfē kapau te nau fie ʻilo lahi ange? Te tau ʻamanaki fēfē ke fie talanoa mai ʻetau fānaú fekauʻaki mo e ponokalafí ʻo kapau ʻoku ʻikai ke tau teitei talanoa mo kinautolu fekauʻaki mo ia?

Ngaahi mātuʻa, kuo pau ke tau kamataʻi ʻa e pōtalanoá pea ʻoua naʻa tatali ki he fānaú ke nau haʻu kiate kitautolu. ʻOku ou manako ʻi he fokotuʻu ke toutou fakahoko ha fepōtalanoaʻaki angamaheni mo fakafiemālie kae ʻikai ko e foʻi tuʻo tahá pē. Ko e ngaahi lelei ʻo e fepōtalanoaʻaki tokangá ko e hoko ʻa e mātuʻá mo e kau taki falalaʻangá ko e kau mataotaó, kae ʻikai ko e Google; ʻe malava ke fakahoko ʻa e talanoá ʻi ha ʻātakai ʻoku malú; pea ʻoku fakatupulaki ʻe he talanoá ʻa e falala ʻa e fānaú. ʻOku tau fie maʻu ʻa e fānaú ke nau ongoʻi mateuteu mo fakaivia, kae ʻikai ilifia. ʻOku tau fie talanoa mo kinautolu kae ʻikai ko e talanoa fekauʻaki mo kinautolu.

ʻI heʻetau hoko ko e mātuʻa mo e kau faiakó, he ʻikai ke tau lava ʻo tokoniʻi ʻa e fānaú kapau ʻoku ʻikai akoʻi mo kitautolu. ʻOku mahuʻinga ke akoʻi ʻa e ko e hā ʻa e ponokalafi mo e ʻuhinga ʻoku totonu ke tau fakaʻehiʻehi ai mei he ponokalafí. Te tau lava ʻo ako maʻatautolu mo tokoniʻi ke mahino ki he fānaú ʻa e ʻuhinga ʻoku hala ai ʻa e ponokalafí, ʻuhinga ʻoku fakatuʻutāmaki aí, ʻuhinga ʻoku ʻikai ke tau fie maʻu ai ke ne fakamamahiʻi kinautolú, pea mo e meʻa ke nau fai ʻo ka nau ka fehangahangai mo iá.

ʻOku tau ʻoange nai ki heʻetau fānaú ha ʻuhinga feʻunga ʻi he toʻu totonú? Kapau ko e ʻuhinga pē ʻoku tau ʻoange kiate kinautolu ke nau fakaʻehiʻehi mei he ponokalafí ko e “ʻOku kovi ia,” ʻe faifai pea fakaiku ia ki ha ʻuhinga taʻetaau. Ka kuo pau ke tau fakahaaʻi ʻa e ngaahi ʻuhinga lahi taha te tau ala lavá ke fokotuʻu ha ʻulungaanga maʻa mo mahuʻinga ʻa ia ʻokú ne poupouʻi hotau toʻu tupú.

ʻOku ʻi ai ha ngaahi ʻuhinga feʻunga ke fakaʻehiʻehi ai mei he ponokalafí, ka ko ha ngaahi poupou ʻeni ʻe niʻihi mei he kautaha Fight the New Drug (Tauʻi ʻa e Faitoʻo Konatapu Foʻoú) ʻa ia ʻe ala tohoakiʻi e tokanga ʻo hotau kakai kei talavoú:

ʻE malava ʻe he ponokalafí ke ne liliu e founga ngāue ho ʻatamaí, pea ʻoku fakahaaʻi ʻe he ngaahi fakatotoló ʻe malava ke ne ʻai ho ʻatamaí ke siʻisiʻi mo ngāvaivai ange.
ʻOku malava ke maʻunimā ʻa e ponokalafí.
ʻE fakaʻauha ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa hoʻo falala pē kiate koé.
ʻE lava ʻe he ponokalafí ʻo ʻai koe ke ke tuenoa.
ʻE lava ʻe he ponokalafí ʻo fakamamahiʻi ʻa kinautolu ʻokú ke ʻofa aí.
ʻE lava ʻe he ponokalafí ʻo maumauʻi e feohi fakasekisualé.
ʻOku fehokotaki ʻa e ponokalafí mo e fakamamahí.
ʻOku ngaohi ʻe he ponokalafí e kakaí ke nau iku ʻo taʻefaitotonu.
ʻE hanga ʻe he ponokalafí ʻo fakamoleki ho taimí mo e iví.
ʻOku fakatupu ʻe he ponokalafí ʻa e loto-mafasiá, loto-hohaʻá, mo e fakamāʻiá.

Te u tānaki atu ki ai ʻoku fepaki ʻa e ponokalafí mo e ngaahi fekau ʻa e ʻOtuá. ʻI he ngaahi ʻuhinga ko ʻení mo ha ngaahi ʻuhinga lahi kehekehe pē, ʻoku tau fakahaaʻi ai ha ngaahi ʻuhinga lelei ke fakaʻehiʻehi mei he ponokalafí, ka ko e maʻu e ʻiló kae taʻe fai ha ngāué ʻoku fakatau ia ki he taʻefiemālie. Kuo pau ke tau fokotuʻu ha ngaahi fakangatangata mo e fakatuʻamelie ʻoku ʻuhingamālie mo ala tokoní. ʻOku mahuʻinga ke tokoniʻi e fānaú ke nau fokotuʻu haʻanau ʻuhinga pē ʻanautolu ki heʻenau fie fakamamaʻo mei he ponó. Kapau he ʻikai fili ʻe ha fānau maʻana pē ʻa ʻene fakakaukau fekauʻaki mo e meʻá ni, ʻe lava ke ne kau ʻi he niʻihi tokolahi fakaofo ʻo e kuonga ní.

3. Fakamoʻui: “Te U ʻOfa Maʻu Pē ʻIate Koe”

Ko e taimi ʻoku ʻilo ai e fānaú ki he ponokalafí pea fakafihiaʻi kinautolu ʻi aí, ʻoku nau fāinga ke fakafōtunga, ke fakaakeake, pea mo fakamoʻui. ʻOku fie maʻu ʻa e tokoni ʻoku moʻoní, fakamaatoató, hokohokó, mālohí, mo kātaki fuoloá ʻi he taimi ʻoku toʻo ai ʻe he fānaú maʻanautolu ʻa e fatongia ki honau fakaakeaké pea hoko atu ʻenau moʻuí. ʻOku ʻikai ha taha te ne lava ʻo fai ʻa e faʻahinga tokoni ko ʻení ʻo tatau mo e mātuʻá. ʻI he hili ʻetau tokanga mo akoʻi fakafoʻituitui ʻa e moʻoní, ʻi he hili ʻetau langa māmālie ʻa e falalá mo fakaʻaiʻai ʻa e fepōtalanoaʻakí, ʻe fie maʻu leva ke ʻiloʻi ʻe he fānaú ʻe neongo ai pē haʻanau fehālaaki mo haʻanau fili, te tau fakapapauʻi “Te u ʻofa maʻu pē ʻiate koe ʻo tatau ai pē.”

ʻOku ou manatu ki ha meʻa siʻisiʻi naʻe hoko ʻi homau fāmilí ʻi he ngaahi taʻu kuo hili atú. Naʻá ku mamaʻo mo hoku husepānití mei ʻapi, pea naʻe tokangaʻi ʻe homa foha lahi tahá ʻa e toenga ʻo e fānaú. Ne fetuʻutaki mai homa kaungāʻapí ʻo ofongi mai naʻe ʻi ai ha veeni tāmate afi ʻi homau ʻapí. Ne ma fakatovave atu ki ʻapi pea ne ma ʻiloʻi naʻe vaʻinga homa foha taʻu hongofulú ʻi he konga ki mui homau ʻapí, ʻa ia naʻe ofi ki ha loto ʻataʻatā ʻeka-ʻe-ono naʻe lalahi mo mōmoa ai ʻa e sāfá. Naʻá ne feinga ke ʻiloʻi pe te ne lava nai ʻo tafu ha afi ʻaki e mofisifisi ʻo e uloʻi afí.

Naʻe mahino lelei ʻokú ne lava ia! ʻI he taimi ne ma aʻu atu aí, ne ʻosi tāmateʻi ʻe he tāmate afí ʻa e vela siʻisiʻi ne hokó, naʻe ʻosi talanoa ʻa e ʻōfisa tāmate afí mo homa fohá, pea naʻe kamata ke mātuku atu ʻa e kaungāʻapí. Naʻe fakamāʻia, ilifia, mo loʻimataʻia homa fohá, pea naʻá ne ʻiloʻi naʻá ne fai ha kovi lahi.

Ne mau hū kotoa ki fale. Naʻe mātuʻaki ilifia homa fohá, neongo ne fakatuʻutāmaki e meʻa naʻe hokó, ka ko e meʻa pē ne ma lava ʻo faí ko e fāʻofua ki he kiʻi tamasiʻi ʻofeina ko ʻení mo fakapapauʻi kiate ia ʻa ʻema ʻofá mo ʻema fiemālie naʻe ʻikai ha meʻa ʻe hoko kiate iá.

ʻI he taimi ʻoku ʻilo ai e fānaú ki he ponokalafí pea tautautefito ki he taimi ʻoku nau fihia ai ʻi hono ivi tākiekiná, te nau fakamāʻia, manavahē, pea loʻimataʻia foki. ʻOku faingataʻa ke aleaʻi ha meʻa naʻe fakahoko fakafufū pea ʻai ke ʻilo. ʻOku ongo fakamā mo uesiangofua. ʻE lava ke nau tōnounou mo faingataʻaʻia ʻi heʻenau feinga ke fakaakeake mo moʻuí. ʻOku mahuʻinga ʻenau fie maʻu ke ʻofaʻi maʻu peé. Ka neongo ia, ʻoku fie maʻu ke ʻiloʻi ʻe he mātuʻá ʻe ala tokoni maʻu pē ʻenau ʻofá ka ʻoku ʻikai ko e meʻa pē ia ʻoku fie maʻú.

ʻI he feinga ki ha fakamoʻuí, ʻe fie maʻu ke ke fakahaaʻi ʻa e ʻofa ko ia ʻokú ke maʻu ki hoʻo tamá ʻaki haʻo fekumi ki he maʻuʻanga tokoni totonú. Ko hoʻo ʻofá ko e fakavaʻe ia ki he meʻa kuo pau ke hokó, ka ʻo kapau ʻoku fihia ha taha ʻokú ke ʻofa ai, te ke faʻa fekumi ki he kau mataotao te nau ala tokoniʻi e taha ʻokú ke ʻofa aí pea tokoniʻi mo koe.

ʻI hoʻo fekumi mo e tokotaha ʻokú ke ʻofa aí ki ha fakamoʻuí, ʻoku ou fakatauange te ke maʻu ha ivi ʻi he Tokotaha ʻokú Ne maʻu e mālohi ke fakamoʻui e mataʻikafo kotoa peé, fakatahatahaʻi ʻa e kakaí, mo fakatupu ha ngaahi vā fetuʻutaki ʻoku ope atu ʻi he meʻa ʻoku tau lava ʻo fakakaukau ki aí. ʻOku maʻu ʻe hotau Fakamoʻuí, ko e Faifakamoʻui angamaluú, ʻa e mālohi ke fakahaofí. Te tau lava ʻo hoko ko e ngaahi mātuʻa ki heʻetau fānaú mo tokoniʻi ke nau haʻu kiate Ia, ka ko Ia toko taha pē ʻe hoko ko honau Fakamoʻuí. Pea ko e meʻa fakaofo tahá, ʻokú Ne ʻofa ʻi heʻetau fānaú ʻo haohaoa ange ia ʻiate kitautolu—ʻo tatau ai pē pe ko e hā.