2021
Te u Tokoniʻi Fēfē ha Fānau ʻOku Ongoʻi Loto-Mafasia?
ʻAokosi 2021


Te u Tokoniʻi Fēfē ha Fānau ʻOku Ongoʻi Loto-Mafasia?

Te ke tokoniʻi fēfē hoʻo fānaú ʻi he taimi ʻoku loto-foʻi aí?

ʻĪmisi
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ʻOku ʻi ai ha ngaahi taimi ʻoku ongoʻi loto-mamahi pe loto-foʻi ai e taha kotoa pē. ʻI hoʻo hoko ko ha mātuʻá, mahalo te ke fakatokangaʻi ha ngaahi liliu ki he ʻulungaanga hoʻo fānaú ʻo ʻikai ke mahino lelei ʻa hono ʻuhingá. Ko ha ngaahi meʻa ʻeni ke ke fakatokangaʻi mo ha ngaahi founga ke tokoniʻi ai hoʻo fānaú.

Fakatokangaʻi ha Ngaahi Meʻa ʻoku Ngali Fakatupu Hohaʻa

Kapau ʻoku ʻita lahi ange pe loto-mamahi hoʻo fānaú ʻo laka hake ʻi ha uike ʻe ua, mahalo te ke fifili pe ʻokú ne maʻu e loto-mafasiá. ʻOku lava ke hā kehekehe mai e loto-mafasiá ʻi he fānaú mo e toʻu tupú mei heʻene hoko ʻi he kakai lalahí. ʻE kau e ngaahi fakaʻilonga ko ʻení, ʻi he taimi ʻoku loto-mamahi pe loto-mafasia ai hoʻo fānaú:

  • Ngaahi fuʻu liliu lahi ʻi he tōʻongá.

  • Tō lalo ʻaupito e maaka ʻi he akó, hangē ko e holo mei he A ki he F.

  • Liliu ʻi he ngaahi kaungāmeʻá, ʻo taimi lahi ʻoku faʻa fili ha ngaahi kaungāmeʻa ʻoku ʻikai ke leleí.

  • Ta‘eoliʻia.

  • ʻIkai ke toe saiʻia ʻi he ngaahi ʻekitivitií.

  • Liliu ʻi he tōʻonga mohé, ʻo kau ai e faʻa mohé pe ʻikai maʻu ha mohe feʻungá.

  • Palopalema ʻi he tukutaha ʻo e tokangá [ʻi ha faʻahinga meʻá].

  • Ongosia.

  • ʻIkai ha tokanga ki he kahaʻú.

  • Hanu ʻoku felāngaaki mo mamahiʻia ka ʻoku ʻikai hāsino mai hano tupuʻanga.

  • Fai ha ngaahi fakamatala pe fakakaukau fekauʻaki mo e maté pe taonakitá.

  • Ngaahi liliu ʻi he anga ʻo e maʻu meʻatokoní.

ʻI he taimi ʻoku loto-mafasia ai e fānaú, ʻe ala ongoʻi ʻe he mātuʻá ʻo hangē ko hanau foʻuí pe naʻa nau fai ha fehalaaki. Manatuʻi ʻoku ʻikai ke kamata maʻu pē ʻa e loto-mafasiá koeʻuhi ko ha meʻa naʻe fai ʻe ha taha, pea he ʻikai ke lava ia ʻo tuku ʻaki hono tala pē ki he kiʻi tamasiʻí/taʻahiné ke tuku ʻene ongoʻi loto-mafasiá. ʻOku faʻa hoko e loto-mafasia ʻi he fānaú mei he ongoʻi lōmekiná. ʻI hoʻo hoko ko ha mātuʻá, fai ho lelei tahá ke ke nonga pē mo tukutaha ho tokangá ke fakafanongo mo fakapapauʻi. ʻE lava ke ke akoʻi fakaeloto hoʻo kiʻi tamasiʻí/taʻahiné mo tataki māmālie ia ke fakatupulaki e ngaahi taukei ʻe tokoni ke ne matuʻuaki ai e ngaahi ongo fakaeloto mālohí.

Founga ke Tokoniʻi ai Hoʻo Kiʻi Tamasiʻí/Taʻahiné

Fokotuʻu ha vā fetuʻutaki mālohi ange ʻi he mātuʻá mo e fānaú

Kapau ʻokú ke fakatokangaʻi ha ngaahi fakaʻilonga ʻe niʻihi naʻe hiki atu kimuʻá, tokoniʻi hoʻo fānaú ke ne ongoʻi ʻoku poupouʻi mo ʻofaʻi ia. Kumi ki ha ngaahi founga ke fakaleleiʻiʻaki e vā mo hoʻo fānaú. ʻE tokoni eni ki hoʻo fānaú ke fefaʻuhi lelei ange mo e ngaahi tūkunga fakamafasiá. ʻOku kau ʻi he ngaahi founga ki hono fakatupulaki ʻo e vā fetuʻutaki ʻa e mātuʻá mo e fānaú ʻa e:

  • Taimi fakataautaha mo iá (fānaú).

  • Pōtalanoa mo fakafanongó.

  • Fakapapauʻi ki hoʻo fānaú ʻe fakaʻau pē ke toe lelei ange.

  • Fai hano fakahikihikiʻi.

  • Fakamahinoʻi ange ʻa e ngaahi mālohingá.

  • Ngaahi fakahaaʻi ʻo e ʻofá.

  • Tokoniʻi hoʻo fānaú.

Kumi tokoni mei he niʻihi kehé

Neongo ko ho fatongia ke tokoniʻi hoʻo fānaú, ʻoua te ke feinga ke fakahoko toko taha pē ia. Naʻe pehē ʻe ʻEletā Sefilī R. Hōlani ʻo e Kōlomu ʻo e Kau ʻAposetolo ʻe Toko Hongofulu Mā Uá: “Kapau ʻokú ke puke ʻi he ʻapenitikí, ʻe finangalo ʻa e ʻOtuá ke ke feinga ke maʻu ha tāpuaki fakataulaʻeiki mo e tokoni fakafaitoʻo lelei taha ʻe ala maʻú. ʻOku pehē pē ʻa e loto-taʻotaʻomiá pe mafasia fakaelotó. ʻOku finangalo ʻa e Tamai Hēvaní ke tau fakaʻaongaʻi e ngaahi meʻafoaki fakaofo kotoa pē kuó Ne foaki mai ʻi he kuonga fakakōsipeli nāunauʻiá ni.”1

Fekumi ki ha tokoni mei he Tamai Hēvaní ʻi he lotu, kae pehē foki ki ha tokoni mei he fāmilí mo e ngaahi kaungāmeʻá, kau taki ʻo e Siasí (kau ai e kau taki ʻi he Lakanga Taulaʻeiki Faka-ʻĒloné pe Kau Finemuí) pea malava pē ke kau mo ha taha fakapalōfesinale kuo ako ki he moʻui lelei fakaeʻatamaí.2 Kapau te ke fakakaukau ke kumi ha tokoni fakapalōfesinale, fili ha tokotaha faleʻi ʻoku taukei he ngāue mo e fānaú pea lava ke mahino ki ai e ngaahi hohaʻa ʻokú ke maʻu fekauʻaki mo hoʻo kiʻi tamá. ʻOku mahuʻinga ke ke kau ki hono tokoniʻi hoʻo kiʻi tamá peá ke ʻalu ʻi he lahi taha ʻe malavá ki he fakataha faleʻí fakataha mo hoʻo fānaú.

Ko e toketā hoʻo fānaú ko ha maʻuʻanga tokoni ia ʻe taha te ke lava ʻo kumi tokoni ki ai. ʻE lava ke ʻomi ʻe he toketaá ha faitoʻo ʻi he taimi ʻoku fie maʻu aí ke tokangaʻi ʻaki e ngaahi fakaʻilonga ʻo e loto-mafasiá.

Tānaki atu ha fokotuʻutuʻu ki he moʻuí

ʻOku mahuʻinga ki hoʻo kiʻi tamá ke ʻi ai ha fokotuʻutuʻu. Kapau ʻe ʻiloʻi ʻe hoʻo kiʻi tamá e meʻa ke ʻamanaki atu ki ai mo e taimi ʻe hoko aí, te ne ongoʻi nonga ange pea malava ke ne matuʻuaki ha liliu. Ko ha ngaahi founga ʻeni ʻe niʻihi ke tānaki atu ʻa e fokotuʻutuʻú ki he ngāue fakaʻaho pe fakauike hoʻo kiʻi tamá:

  • Fakakaukauʻi ha taimi pau ki he mohé.

  • ʻĀ hake he taimi tatau ʻi he ʻaho kotoa pē.

  • Vahevahe ange kiate kinautolu ʻa e taimi-tēpile ki he ʻaho ko iá.

  • Fakangatangata e taimi ngāue ʻaki ʻo e naunau fakaʻilekitulōniká.

  • Longomoʻui fakaesino—ko ha meʻa lelei ha luelue ʻo ʻeveʻeva fakafāmili.

  • Kau fakataha ʻi he tupulaki fakalaumālié, kau ai ʻa e fai maʻu pē ʻo e ako ki he ongoongoleleí mo e lotu fakafāmilí.

  • Maʻu meʻatokoni fakataha ko ha fāmili ʻi he ʻaho kotoa pē.

Poupouʻi hoʻo kiʻi tamá ke kau ki he ngaahi ʻekitivitī fakafāmilí hangē ko ha vaʻinga pe sio faiva fakataha. ʻE lava foki ke tokoni hano tā ha sīpinga ʻo hono tokangaʻi pē kitá pea akoʻi ki hoʻo fānaú ʻa e ngaahi founga te ne lava ai ʻo tuku ha taimi ke ne tokangaʻi pē ia. Mahalo te ke fili ke fakaʻaongaʻi pe fakahoko ha ngaahi ʻekitivitī mohu fakakaukau fakataha mo hoʻo fānaú pe fāmilí.

Manatuʻi ʻoku malava pē ke ʻi ai e fehokotaki fakatoto ki he loto-mafasiá, pea mahalo te ke loto-siʻi mei hoʻo faingataʻaʻiá ʻi hoʻo feinga ke tokoniʻi e loto-mafasia hoʻo fānaú. Kapau ʻokú ke maʻu e ngaahi fakaʻilonga ʻo e loto-mafasiá, ʻoku mahuʻinga ke mapuleʻi e ngaahi fakaʻilonga ko iá pea fekumi ki ha tokoni fakapalōfesinale kapau ʻoku kamata ke ke ongoʻi lōmekina. Kapau ʻoku ʻikai te ke tokangaʻi lelei koe, te ke fakatokangaʻi ʻe faingataʻa ange haʻo tokoniʻi hoʻo fānaú ʻi heʻenau faingataʻaʻiá.

Ngaahi Maʻuʻanga Fakamatalá

  1. Jeffrey R. Holland, “Hangē ha Ipu Kuo Maumaú,” Liahona, Nōvema 2013, 41.

  2. Justin K. McPheters and Rebecca M. Taylor, “Is Therapy Right for Me?” (fakaʻilekitulōnika pē) Ensign, Feb. 2020.

Paaki