2020
Bōro ko Deili kōn Kinej ko Rem̧wilaļ: Meļeļe kōn Ko̧kkure ko ilo Baam̧le eo
Oktoba 2020


Bōro ko Deili kōn Kinej ko Rem̧wilaļ: Meļeļe kōn Ko̧kkure ko ilo Baam̧le eo

Jon̄ak ko rejjab em̧m̧an remaron̄ waļo̧k ilo jabdewōt kain jem̧jerā. Kile jon̄ak ko rejjab em̧m̧an remaron̄ kwaļo̧k ko̧kkure eo ak kōbōjrake m̧okta jān an jinoe.

Pija
upset woman and husband

Pija ko kar kōjerbali n̄an un ko n̄an kōmeļeļe wōt, pija jān model ro

Raan ko ļo̧k, juon baba erub būruōn ekar ko̧o̧ļ eō. Leddik eo nejin Jenna (et ko rekar oktak) ekar pād ettoļo̧k ilo kaļōj im ekar jerā, ekar lukkuun m̧ōkaj an leddik eo nejin im ļaddik eo jeran iakwe doon. Ļaddik eo jeran, etan in Jake, kar kōņaan bwe erro en m̧are iien eo m̧ōkajtata im kadikļo̧k an Jenna ko̧o̧le ak kōnono ippān ro jinen im jemān. Jenna ekar joļo̧k an bōd n̄an er, ekar kōmeļeļeiki kōn kajoor in iakwe eo an Jake im ikdeleel eo an bwe kom̧ro en joļo̧k eļap am̧ro iien ippān āinwōt juon ripālele.

Baam̧le eo an Jenna rekar jino inepata ke rekar lo bwe Jake ekar wōr pāleen m̧okta ļo̧k im nejin ak ekar jab ba n̄an Jenna. Rekar ko̧o̧ļe lio kar ippān m̧okta, eo ekar ba bwe Jake emaļkaro im ekammo. Ke Jake ekar jeļā menin ekar jino illu. Ekar ba bwe ro jinen im jemān rekar “kabojooj” im ba kōn iien eo rekar jab m̧ōņōņō kōn kōm̧m̧an kōjak in kajirere eo me ekar ba kōn jeļā eo an Jenna. Jake ekar kōm̧m̧an kōjak ilo an ba bwe Jenna make kar kāālet bwe en jab bar kōnono ippān ro jinen im jemān. Ro jinen im jemān Jenna rekar lukkuun aikuji kōnke ko̧o̧ļ im text ko aer rekar jab uwaak.

Aolep rekar kōņaan juon baam̧le eo elem̧ōņōņō, ak jekdo̧o̧n n̄e armej rej kajjieon̄ mour kōn gospel eo, jem̧jerā ko remaron̄ kōmetak. Jet apan̄ ko rej tōprak in likjab in meļeļe im kōņaan ko an armej make ekkā aer waļo̧k ilo baam̧le ko. Ijoke, ilo juon em̧ eo ewāmourur jem̧jerā ko ie, armej rej joļo̧k an doon bōd kōn likjab in m̧wil ko im kōkm̧anm̧anļo̧k jem̧jerā ko, ak ilo jem̧jerā ko rejjab em̧m̧an, enaaj wōr jon̄ak in kabojooj im nana aer kōm̧m̧an n̄an doon me ej erom̧ ko̧kkure.

Ko̧kkure ko Renana im Gospel eo

“Kom̧ ar rupe bōro ub ko būruōn kōrā ro pāllemi, im jako jān kōjatdikdik an ajri ro nejimi” (Jekab 2:35).

Ko̧kkure ko ekoba m̧akūtkūt ko rej n̄an kōmetak ak kajebwebeik. Ekoba jon̄an m̧wil ko jet me emaron̄ koba kōjool, kōjebwebweik, kōnana, im jorrāān ko ilo ānbwin im m̧ōm̧ ilo kanniōk.1 Kaburom̧ōjm̧ōj eo, m̧wil in ko̧kkure ko ekkā aer waļo̧k, ippān jet ritijem̧ļo̧k ro rej watwate e bwe tarrin 1 m̧ōttan emān in ajri ipeļaakin laļ in enana aer kōm̧m̧an n̄an er ilo ānbwin, m̧ōm̧ ilo kanniōk ak en̄jake.2 Rūtto ro rej barāinwōt eļap jon̄an ko̧kkure er, kōn jon̄an tarrin ne 1 ilubwiljin 4 kōrā im 1 ilubwiljin 10 em̧m̧aan rekar en̄jake jorrāān ilo ānbwin jān eo pāleer.

Ko̧kkure emaron̄ waļo̧k ilo jabdewōt jem̧jerā, jim̧or m̧aan im kōrā remaron̄ erom̧ ro rej kōm̧m̧an ko̧kkure eo. Ijoke, em̧m̧aan ro ekkā aer kōjebwebweiki im kōm̧m̧an jorrāān ko ilo ānbwin im m̧ōm̧ ilo kanniōk, im kōrā ro ekkā wōt an ļap aer mijak, kōmakoko, ak lukkuun kōmetak er jān ļeo pālele.3

Ko̧kkure ej kōmetak mour an jim̧or armej eo emetak kōn naan im armej eo ejorrāān im ejjab jim̧we ilo katak ko an Rilo̧mo̧o̧r. Rikanaan ro raan kein rekar kwaļo̧k bwe “ro rej kakkure pāleen ak ro nejin … naaj ņaruwier im̧aan Anij ilo aer jab kōm̧m̧ane eddo kein aer.”4 Riko̧kkure ro ekkā aer kōjekdo̧o̧n ak kōm̧m̧an n̄an kōņaan ko aer make kōn katak ko an gospel. N̄an waanjon̄ak, ikar kapilōk juon ripālele eo me ļeo pālele ekar ko̧kkure eo pāleen ilo an ellolo im ikkure kōn jāān ko aerro, ak ijjeļo̧kin an jeorļo̧k bōd, ekar kōņaan bwe kōrā eo pāleen en joļo̧k an bōd im kwaļo̧k ke kōrā eo “eļapļo̧k an jerawiwi” eļan̄n̄e ejjab jeorļo̧k an bōd. Ekar m̧akoko kōn an kōrā eo metak im ba bwe ejim̧we im̧aan mejān Anij ak eban erom̧ juon rijerbal ilo tampeļ. Ke kōrā eo pāleen ekar kōnono ippān ritōl ro an Kabun̄ in, ekar kajejtokjen aer kinaake im kōļapļap kōn inepata ko an kōrā eo pāleen, ej ba bwe elōn̄ an nan̄inmej in inepata. Ļeo pālele ekar jum̧ae “pedped ko an … kautiej, iakwe, [im] jeļā ņae doon”5 im nana an kōm̧m̧an n̄an kōrā eo pāleen. Kijejeto ko an n̄an mour kōn katak ko an gospel ekar jab maron̄ kōkm̧anm̧anļo̧k būrabōļōm eo me ekar ejaake.Kajjojo iaad jemaron̄ ejaake m̧wil ko rejjab em̧m̧an. Ewōr jet m̧wil ko rej ekkeijel ippān elōn̄ kain ko̧kkure ko, im n̄e reļļapļo̧k im ekutkut men kein, enaaj nana ļo̧k jem̧jerā eo. En̄rein rej jet iaan jon̄ak in ko̧kkure ko me remaron̄ jipan̄ eok kile m̧wil ko renana ilo kwe make im ilo ro jet.

Pija
sad little girl

1. Lāj

“Kōn loeir raar m̧oņ, wūno kōn mej an asp ko ej ilo tieir: … [lo̧n̄ir] e obrak kōn kanejnej im meo̧” (Rom 3:13–14).

Juon em̧m̧aan ekar lotok eō n̄an kappok jipan̄ ņae kōņaan ko an lio pāleen, eo ekar kajirere kake e kōn an “aikuj jipan̄.” Ilo m̧ōnjar eo ekar lukkuun jouj im ļap an wūjlepļo̧k an, ak ilo m̧weo elāj ilo an luuki kōmetak āinwōt kein dan̄dan̄ whip. Ekar kōm̧m̧an kōjak kōn kōļļā eo an im ekar ņa etan katak ko an “juon jerbal an leddik jidikdik.” Ekar ba n̄an ļaddik eo nejin, “Ij kōjatdikdik bwe kwoban m̧ōjņo im immijakjak āinwōt jem̧am̧,” im joļo̧k aolepān rainin kōn taļboon ippān jinen, eo me rej kajirere kōn ļōmaro pāleer. Armej ro rej likūt rejim̧we ilo aer kōmetak im “iakwe n̄an kaen̄taan ro jet” (Katak im Bujen Ko 121:13). Ro uwaan baam̧le kein rej rupe kien ko an Jisōs n̄an “jab ekajet” im “jab liaakļo̧k” (Luk 6:37) āinwōt rejjab aorōk, kwaļo̧k jab kōņaan, ak kūr etaer.

2. M̧oņ

“Kwo juk kōn jitōbōn m̧oņ, im kwaar likūtļo̧k Jitōbōn Anij” (Alma 30:42).

M̧oņ ekkā an waļo̧k ilo m̧oņ āinwōt eo ej kōm̧m̧an ko̧kkure eo ej kadikļo̧k kōm̧m̧an ko an, ņa ruōn ro jet, im ukōt naan ko. Rein kar kōmetak er retarpok, āinwōt juon iaan etale im jerbal ippān ekar kōmeļeļeiki: “[Ļeo pālele ekajoor] illu innem joļo̧k an bōd innem ba, ‘Ekwe am̧ bōd’ … enej kōnnaan n̄an n̄e ijino tōmake.”6 Kariab kōn m̧ool an bar juon armej ņa etan kapok, im likūt eo me kar kōmetake eo ilo pok im jab meļeļe kōn emmemļo̧kjeņ ko an im tōmak ko an. Āinwōt m̧oņ ko jet, kapok ej jerbal n̄an ukukot bwebwenato ko im likūt riab eo im̧aantata.

Ro rej ko̧kkure ro jet lukkuun kōttōbar n̄an kōjekdo̧o̧n aer kwaļo̧k m̧ool ke relukkuun metak im ekkā aer naaj watōk er kar kōmetak er. Ke Jenna ekar kwaļo̧k an eddo wōt būruōn kōn kōm̧m̧an kōjak ko an Jake kōn ro jinen, Jake ekar illu im kwaļo̧k bwe Jenna ekar “kōmetak” e. Jake ekar pād ilubwiljin “ro rej lam̧ōj bōd … im er make rej nejin kipiliia” (Katak im Bujen Ko 121:17). Ekar jab kwaļo̧k wōt bōd in bwebwenato ko an ak ekar barāinwōt illu kōn m̧ool eo.7

Pija
man with head in hands

3. Jekpen Ņae Ko

“Kwaļo̧k jirilo̧k ko am̧ im bōd eo kwaar kōm̧m̧anee” (Alma 39:13).

Juon armej eo ettā ej en̄jake ajļo̧k ilo an kōmetak ro jet im ukweļo̧k im kōm̧m̧an em̧m̧anļo̧k. Juon eo eļap an ko̧kkure ej kōjekdo̧o̧n elmakot ko kōn jekpen ņae ko. Āinwōt juon ij intōrpiuiki im bōk meļeļe ikkijeen ko̧kkure ekar keememejļo̧k, “Ekajoor nana aō mour kōn ko̧kkure ko ilo ānbwin, innem tokālik ikajoor ļōmņak bwe emaron̄ kar jab bōk jikin eļan̄n̄e in kar kiil wōt lo̧n̄iiū.” An “būrom̧ōj eaar jab n̄an ukeļo̧k” (Mormon 2:13) ak ijjeļo̧kin ekar kajejtokjen kōn illu im ņa ruōn.

Kōn jipan̄, ikar ba juon kōttan n̄an kōrā eo pāleeō bwe ijjan̄in kar lo an kwaļo̧k an būrom̧ōj ium̧win iiō ko in an kajirere kōn ļeo pāleen. Uwaak eo an ekar jab ajļo̧k ak nana tamm̧ūn: “Em̧m̧an, bar juon e men ijjab kōm̧m̧ane!” Armej eo eļap aer kōm̧m̧an ko̧kkure ko rej m̧akoko kōn eddo ko aer im em̧ōkaj aer illu im rej bōbraeik er make. Ekkā an m̧ōkaj aer metak kōn men dikdik ko.

4. Utiej Bōro

“A kōn ettā būruōmi jabdewōt en ļōmņak ro jet rem̧m̧an jān e” (Pilippai 2:3).

Utiej bōro ekoba taitōļ ko rej kabwijeri im aolep men e. Juon em̧m̧aan ekar lam̧ōje kōrā eo pāleen im ajri ro aolep iien ekar ļōmņak rejjab “kautiej” e. Eļan̄n̄e tōmak eo aer ejjab jejjet n̄an kōņaan eo an, rej kwaļo̧k ke ejjeļo̧k an “maron̄” ak “rejjab pokake.” Utiej bōro ej jiāe im mije wōt kajoor im kōņaan wōt wiin. N̄an oktan, juon baam̧le eo em̧m̧an ej jerbal ippān doon, ijo ewōr aolep rej jon̄an wōt juon, im membōr ro “kōm̧m̧an jim̧we n̄an eo juon” (4 Nipai 1:2). Ripālele ro rej aikuj jon̄an wōt juon,8 ijo kajjojo ewōr aer maron̄ in kwaļo̧k ainikier im ļōmņak im tōmak ko aer raorōk.

5. Kōjebwebweik

“N̄e jej … kōjerbal ankoņak ak bōkjab ak kipel ioon jetōb ko an ro nejin armej raņ, ilo jabdewōt jekjek in jab wānōk, … lan̄ ko make rej jenļo̧k [im] Jetōb eo an Irooj ej būrom̧ōj.”

Men̄e jej kaorōk anemkwoj in kāālet ko ad, ekabwūlōn̄lōn̄ ewi jon̄an an ro uwaan baam̧le ko ba n̄an doon wāween n̄an ļōmņak, en̄jake, im kōm̧m̧an. Jet iaan rej kōjebwebweik ilo aer kaleln̄on̄ er, kajooke er, kōjoole er, ak kaamijak er. Juon em̧m̧aan ripālele ekar kōtmene bwe lio pālele ej aikuj kōpooj kam̧abun̄ eo aolep jibbon̄ ilo jet iien, en kōpooj kōņaan ko an me ekar kajjitōk, im ron̄jake e ikkijeen “aikuj ko” an, eo me ekkā an koba ta eo me emaron̄ kar kōkm̧anm̧anļo̧k. Ekar etale jon̄an an joļo̧k jāān im jino illu eļan̄n̄e ejjab uwaake text ko an.

Bar juon m̧am̧a ej kwaļo̧k an inepata kōn jiron̄ eo nejin ej kwaļo̧k aolep iien n̄e jiron̄ eo nejin ej kwaļo̧k an būrom̧ōj ak ejjab mour kōn jon̄ak an juon m̧am̧a. Eļan̄n̄e kōtmene ko rekar jab bōk jikier, ak eļan̄n̄e ļeo pāleen ej kwaļo̧k an inepata, ejjab ba jabdewōt.

Pija
holding hands

Kōjatdikdik im Kōmour

“Iar ron̄jake am̧ jar, Iar lo am̧ dānnin kōmjaalaļ: Lo, Inaaj kemour eok” (2 Kiin̄ 20:5).

Men̄e ko̧kkure ej kōmetak bōro, oktak emaron̄ bōk jikin aolep iien. Ro rej metak maron̄ tōpar kein jipan̄ ko ilo jetōb im ko retijem̧ļo̧k im kappukot kajoor in Pinmuur eo an Rilo̧mo̧o̧r n̄an kōmour kinej ko aer. N̄an kappuktok jipan̄, etal n̄an abuse.ChurchofJesusChrist.org.

Ro em̧ōj ko̧kkure er rej aikuj ukweļo̧k im kappukot jipan̄. Menin emenin aikuj ej wōnm̧aanļo̧k wōt “itok n̄an m̧wilaļ in ettā” (3 Nipai 12:2) im bōk eddo eo elikio kōn m̧wil ko aer. Oktak ebōk eļapļo̧k jān kallim̧ur ko an jidik wōt iien im kijejeto ko me rej kajejtokjen būrabļōm ko. Metak in ukweļo̧k em̧ool ej būrom̧ōj eļap, im jet reban kōņaan kōm̧m̧ane, eo me ej etal jān armej eo ej metak kōn jokāālet ko reppen kōn wāween n̄an kōjparok er make.9

Jemedwōj Ilan̄ ej inepata kōn kōj ejjeļo̧k oktak jān baba eo ekar kooļe eō kōn leddik eo nejin. Iakwe eo an Anij ej “depakpakļo̧k āinwōt indeeo” (Moses 7:41), im Em̧wūlaļ an metak n̄e ajri ro Nejin rej kōmetak doon. Ilo iien bwebwenato em̧m̧an ippān Enoch, E ej jan̄. “Rein jeiūm im jatūm̧, er rej eļtan pā ko Peiū make, … im [kar letok] kien eo, bwe ren iakwe doon, im bwe er ren kāālet Eō, eo Jemāer, … a lo, er ejjeļo̧k aer en̄jake, im er rej dike bōtōktōkier make” (Moses 7:32–33). Elōn̄ būrom̧ōj ilo lan̄ im ilo laļ n̄e ānbwin ko im jetōb ko rej metak im kinejnej. Em̧ool, kōn ettā, kajoor an Anij, im jipan̄ ko retijem̧ļo̧k im rekkar, emaron̄ bōjrak an m̧wil kein ko̧kkure m̧wil im ejaake juon em̧ eo eļap kautiej ie, ineem̧m̧an, im iakwe.

Kakeememej ko

  1. N̄an meļeļe ko reļļapļo̧k ikkijeen jorrāān ko ilo ānbwin, lale abuse.ChurchofJesusChrist.org. N̄an ko̧kkure ko ilo m̧ōm̧ ilo kanniōk im kōmetak, lale Benjamin M. Ogles, “Agency, Accountability, and the Atonement of Jesus Christ: Application to Sexual Assault” (Brigham Young University devotional, Jan. 30, 2018), speeches.byu.edu; im Chieko N. Okazaki, “Healing from Sexual Abuse” (Brigham Young University conference, Oct. 23, 2002).

  2. Lale Maryam Ajilian Abbasi, Masumeh Saeidi, Gholamreza Khademi, Bibi Leila Hoseini, Zahra Emami Moghadam, “Child Maltreatment in the World: A Review Article,” International Journal of Pediatrics, vol. 3, no. 1 (2014), 353–65.

  3. Lale Hamby, S., “Current controversies: Are women really as violent as men? The ‘gender symmetry’ controversy,” in Claire M. Renzetti, Jeffrey L. Edleson, and Raquel Kennedy Bergen, Sourcebook on Violence Against Women, 3rd ed. (2018), 78–82.

  4. “Baam̧le Eo: Juon Naan in Kean̄ n̄an Laļ in,” Liaona, Māe 2017, 145; barāinwōt lale abuse.ChurchofJesusChrist.org.

  5. “Baam̧le eo: Juon Naan in Kean̄ n̄an Laļ in.”

  6. Jason B. Whiting, Megan Oka, im Stephen T. Fife, “Appraisal distortions and intimate partner violence: Gender, power, and interaction,” Journal of Marital and Family Therapy (2012), suppl: 1:113–49.

  7. N̄an waanjon̄ak ko jet an jeje ko rekwojarjar kōn , lale Jon 3:19–21; Jerbal 7:54; 2 Nipai 1:25–26; im 2 Nipai 4:13.

  8. Lale “Baam̧le Eo: Juon Naan in Kean̄ n̄an Laļ in”; barāinwōt lale H. Burke Peterson, “Unrighteous Dominion,” Ensign, July 1989, 6–11, n̄an meļeļe ko reļļapļo̧k kōn katak ikkijeen jon̄an wōt juon im kajjitōk ko n̄an ļōmņak kaki ikkijeen bujen jem̧jerā ko.

  9. Ro rej pād ilo jekjek in ko̧kkure ko ekkā aer jelm̧ae jokāālet ko kōn ekōjkan aer kōjparok er make, ak kōn ro jet, barāinwōt n̄e rej aikuj kōjenoļo̧k jikier ak kōm̧m̧an jon̄an aer iiaio ippān ro rej kōmetak er. Būreejtōn James E. Faust (1920–2007) ekar kōmeļeļeik bwe jekjek in epen n̄e juon epo ilo “a prolonged and apparently irredeemable relationship that destroys a person’s dignity as a human being” (“Enriching Your Marriage,” Liahona, Apr. 2007, 3); barāinwōt lale “Help for Victims” jekjen eo an website eo an Kabun̄ in ikkijeen bōbrae ko̧kkure n̄an bōk eļapļo̧k meļeļe im kāālet ko jet.

Būriin