Ngaahi Maʻuʻanga Tokoni Faifaleʻí

Te u tokoniʻi fēfē e niʻihi kehé ʻi heʻenau faʻufaʻu ha ngaahi palani?

ʻI hoʻo hoko ko ha taki ʻo e Siasí, ʻoku ʻi ai ho faingamālie makehe ke poupouʻi ʻa e fakafoʻituitui ʻoku nau fefaʻuhi mo hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo e ponokalafí pea ki honau ngaahi malí, mātuʻá, mo e niʻihi kehe ʻoku kau ki aí. ʻE lava ke tokoni hoʻo poupoú ke fakasiʻisiʻi ʻa e ongoʻi mā ʻoku faʻa hoko ʻi hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo e ponokalafí (vakai, Wendy Ulrich, “It Isn’t a Sin to Be Weak,” Ensign, Apr. 2015, 30–35).

ʻOku maʻu ʻe he fakafoʻituitui tokolahi ha ola lelei ʻi heʻenau fakalakalaka mo muimuiʻi ha palani fakatāutaha ke ikunaʻi ʻa e ponokalafí. ʻE fie maʻu fakatouʻosi ʻe he tokotaha ʻoku sio ponokalafi mo hono malí pe ha mēmipa ʻo e fāmilí ha palani fakafoʻituitui ke maʻu ʻa e fakamoʻuí. Ko e fatongia ia ʻo e fakafoʻituitui kotoa pē ke fekumi ki ha fakahā fakatāutaha, maʻu ha ngaahi tali, pea fakalakalaka mo muimuiʻi ʻene palaní. ʻI hoʻo hoko ko ha takí, te ke lava ʻo fakalotolahiʻi ʻa e taha kotoa pē ʻi hono fakatupulaki e ngaahi palaní, ka ko e fatongia ke faʻufaʻu e ngaahi palaní mo fakafuofuaʻi ʻenau ola leleí ʻoku ʻa e fakafoʻituitui kotoa pē ia.

Makatuʻunga ʻi ha ngaahi fetalanoaʻaki kuo ueʻi fakalaumālie mo e fakafoʻituitui mo honau ngaahi malí pe fāmilí, te ke lava ʻo fakalotolahiʻi kinautolu ke faʻufaʻu e ngaahi palaní ke ikunaʻi ʻa e pole faingataʻa ko ʻení. ‘I hono fakatupulaki ʻe he fakafoʻituitui ʻa e ngaahi palani ke liliú, te ke lava ʻo poupouʻi kinautolu ʻi he ngaahi founga ko ʻení:

• Nofotaha ʻia Kalaisi.

• Fakakau mai e ni‘ihi kehé.

• Fakaʻaongaʻi e ngaahi maʻuʻanga tokoni ʻoku feʻungá.

Nofotaha ʻia Kalaisi

Neongo ‘oku ʻoku lahi ‘a e ngaahi founga ke tokoniʻi ʻaki e fakafoʻituitui ke nau fakalakalaká, ka ko ho fatongia ko ha takí ke tokoni‘i e niʻihi kehé ke ha‘u kia Kalaisi, maʻu ‘a e fakamoʻui fakalaumālié, pea feinga ke fakalelei mo e ‘Otuá pea mo kinautolu kuo nau fakamamahiʻi ‘aki honau ʻulungāangá.

ʻI hoʻo fakalotolahiʻi e fakafoʻituitui ke fakatupulaki ʻenau ngaahi palaní, feinga ke tokoniʻi kinautolu ke fakatupulaki ʻenau tui ki he Tamai Hēvaní mo Sīsū Kalaisí. Tokoni‘i e niʻihi kehé ke nau fakatokangaʻi ʻa e ngaahi tāpuaki ʻoku maʻu mei he talangofua ki he Tamai Hēvaní. Fakalotolahiʻi kinautolu ke nau fakaʻaongaʻi ʻa e ngaahi tāpuaki ʻo e Fakalelei ʻa Sīsū Kalaisí pea ke tauhi ʻenau ngaahi fuakavá. Fakaafe‘i kinautolu ke nau fekumi ki he fakahinohino ʻa e Laumālié ʻi heʻenau fakahoko mo fakaleleiʻi ʻenau ngaahi palaní.

Feinga ke tokoniʻi e fakafoʻituituí ke nau tafoki ki he Fakamoʻuí. Ko Ia ʻa e maʻuʻanga ivi mo e poto taupotu tahá. ʻOkú Ne ʻafioʻi mo ʻofeina ʻa e tokotaha takitahá. ʻI he tafoki e fakafoʻituitui ki he ʻEikí, ʻe tataki kinautolu ʻi he founga ke tali ʻaki e palopalema ko ʻení, pea te Ne tokoniʻi kinautolu. Fekumi ki ha tataki fakalaumālie ki he founga ke poupouʻi ai e fakafoʻituituí mo e ngaahi malí mo e founga ke tokoniʻi ai kinautolu ke langaki honau vā fetuʻutaki mo e Fakamoʻuí.

Fakakau Mai e Ni‘ihi Kehé

‘Oku tupulekina fakapulipuli ‘a e ponokalafí mo faʻa ohi mai ha ongo‘i mā. ʻE ala tokoni hono fakalotolahi e fakafoʻituituí kotoa pē ke fetuʻutaki mo e niʻihi kehé ke nau ongoʻi kuo fakamālohia kinautolu. ʻOku mahuʻinga ke langaki fakatouʻosi ʻe fakafoʻituituí mo honau ngaahi malí ha polokalama ke tokoniʻi ʻa e kakai ʻoku nau poupouʻi kinautolu mo ʻenau tupulakí.

ʻOku makatuʻunga ʻa e lahi mo e natula ʻo e tokoni ʻoku fie maʻú ʻi he ngaahi meʻa makehe ki he fakafoʻituituí. Ko ha taha ne siʻisiʻi pē ʻene mamataʻi e ponokalafí te ne fie maʻu pē ha taimi siʻisiʻi ange mo ha tokoni siʻisiʻi ange mei tuʻa ke taʻofi ʻa e palopalemá. ‘E tatau pē ki hono malí. Ka neongo ia, ko ha fakafoʻituitui kuó ne mamata‘i ʻa e ponokalafí ‘i ha vahaʻataimi lōloa ʻo ʻikai ʻilo ki ai hono malí pe kuó ne aʻu ki ha tuʻunga fakatuʻutāmaki ʻo e ponokalafí mahalo te ne fie maʻu ha taimi mo ha tokoni lahi ange. ʻE ala fie maʻu foki ʻe hono malí ha taimi mo ha tokoni lahi ange.

Fāmilí

ʻE lava ke maʻu ʻa e ʻofá, poupoú, mo e fakahinohinó mei he kau mēmipa ʻo e fāmilí. Fakalotolahiʻi e fakafoʻituituí ke nau maʻu ivi mei he mālohinga ʻo honau ngaahi malí, mātuʻá, pe kāingá ʻi he fekuki mo e palopalema ʻo e ponokalafí. Ka neongo ia, ʻoku totonu ke fakakaukauʻi ʻe he fakafoʻituituí ʻa e mamahi ʻe ongoʻi ʻe he kau mēmipa ʻo e fāmilí. Fakalotolahiʻi e fakafoʻituituí ke fekumi ki ha tokoni mei he kau mēmipa ʻo e fāmilí ʻa ia ʻoku nau mateuteu ke tokoniʻi kinautolú. ʻOku meimei ke tupulekina fakapulipuli hono fakaʻaongaʻi ʻo e ponokalafí; ko ia ai, ʻe lava ke hoko hono fakahaaʻi lelei ke ʻiló ko ha tokoni ia ki he fakaakeaké. ʻI he tuʻunga ʻo e malí, fakamaʻú, pe tukupā ha ngaahi hoa mali, ʻoku fuʻu fie maʻu ke fakahā.

Fakaʻaongaʻi e Ngaahi Maʻuʻanga Tokoni ʻoku Feʻungá

ʻOku faʻa lahi ha ngaahi meʻa ʻoku nau takiakiʻi e fakafoʻituituí ke ne fakaʻaongaʻi ʻa e ponokalafí. Neongo ʻoku mahuʻinga ʻa e ngaahi fakaleleiʻi fakalaumālié, ka ʻoku ʻikai ko e tokoni pē ia ʻe taha ʻe fie maʻu ʻe he fakafoʻituituí. Te nau ala fie maʻu ke fakahā ha ngaahi meʻa kehe ʻi heʻenau moʻuí, hangē ko e ngaahi ivi takiekina fakaemoʻui, fakaʻatamai, mo fakasōsiale. Fakalotolahi‘i lelei e fakafoʻituituí ke nau fakakaukau ki ha fa‘ahinga tokoni ʻe ala fie maʻu ke tokangaʻi ʻa e ngaahi ivi takiekina kehe ko ʻení ʻi heʻenau moʻuí. ʻE ala kau heni hono kumi ha tokoni mei he ngaahi maʻuʻanga tokoní hangē ko e ngaahi uepisaiti falalaʻanga mo ha kau mataotao fakafaitoʻo mo fakaʻatamai.

Kau Palofesinalé

ʻE ala fie maʻu ha kau mataotao fakafaitoʻo mo moʻui lelei fakaeʻatamai, tautautefito ki he taimi ʻoku ʻikai loko ola lelei aí neongo e feinga lahi e fakafoʻituituí ke taʻofi e ponokalafí mei heʻenau moʻuí. ʻE ala fie maʻu foki ʻe he ngaahi malí ʻa e faʻahinga tokoni ko ʻení ʻi heʻenau fehangahangai mo hono lavakiʻi ʻo ʻenau falalá. Ko hai pē ʻoku nau fili ke kau ʻi heʻenau ngaahi palani ke ikunaʻi ʻa e ponokalafí ʻoku totonu ke ongoʻi fiemālie mo e ngaahi tuʻunga moʻui ʻo e ongoongoleleí.

Tekinolosiá

ʻE ala tokoni ʻa e ngaahi meʻangāue ʻinitaneti lahi kehekehe ki he fakafoʻituituí ke fakafepakiʻi ʻa e ʻahiʻahi ke sio he ponokalafí. ʻOku ʻomi ʻe he niʻihi ko ʻení ha fakamatala ʻaonga, hangē ko e “Addressing Pornography” konga ʻo e ChurchofJesusChrist.org, ko e Support Guide: Help for Spouses and Family of Those in Recovery, ko e ngaahi sēnolo ʻi he mītia ʻa e Siasí, fightthenewdrug.org, mo ha toe meʻa lahi ange. ʻOku ʻomi ʻe he ngaahi maʻuʻanga tokoni fakaʻilekitulōniká ha ngaahi meʻa ke fakalakalaka ai hangē ko e monitor pe block access, mo e ngaahi maʻuʻanga tokoni kehe, hangē ko e fortify.com, ke ne fai ha fakaleleiʻi ʻo ha meʻa kuo ʻosi fokotuʻutuʻu.

Ko e Ngaahi Konga ʻo ha Palani Lelei

ʻI hono faʻufaʻu ʻe he fakafoʻituitui ʻa e ngaahi palaní, fakalotolahiʻi kinautolu ke nau fakakaukauʻi ʻeni:

• Hiki ‘enau ngaahi palaní, fakahaaʻi e ngaahi ʻekitivitií mo e ngaahi taumuʻá ke mahino, pea toki vahevahe, fakafuofuaʻi, pea toki liliu ʻa e ngaahi palaní ʻo ka fie maʻu.

• Ko hono ʻiloʻi e founga ke kei tukupā ai, neongo e taimi ʻoku fehangahangai ai mo e ngaahi faingataʻá.

• Ko hono fa‘u ʻo ha palani ke haʻisia ki ai, ʻa ia te nau lava ʻo lipooti ʻenau fakalakalaká ki ha mēmipa falalaʻanga ʻo e fāmilí, kaungāmeʻa, pe taki ʻo e Siasí. ʻOku ʻikai fie maʻu ke fakahoko mo e pīsopé ʻa e ngaahi lipooti haʻisia ki he meʻa ʻokú fakahoko pe ʻikai ke fakahokó.

• Fakaafeʻi ha mali, mātuʻa, pe mēmipa kehe ʻo e fāmilí, pe ha tokotaha kehe ke vakaiʻi mo muimuiʻi ʻa e ngaahi palaní. ʻE lava ke ʻaonga hano lipooti maʻu pē ki ha taha kehe ʻa e anga hono ngāueʻi lelei ʻo e ngaahi palaní. (Vakai, “Ko e hā ʻoku fie maʻu ke u tokanga taha ki aí ke ikunaʻi ʻeku tōʻonga ponokalafí?”)